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Posted: Fri Mar 28, 2008 3:12 pm
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I need help. And lots of it!
Ok, I was dating this guy, and I really really liked him. He was my first boyfriend. He was nice, kind, cute, smart, thoughtful, and a lot like me.
So after about a year, he was having problems and taking it out on me. He started getting really obsessed with me and power hungry. He even tried to forced himself on me, but I slapped him and walked out of the room. It was awkward to be around him, but I tried to help him through it. Finally it was too the point where I couldn't take it anymore. I broke up with him. He put me on several guilt trips, tring to get me back. I refused. It broke my heart as much as his, but I knew it was for the best, and I stuck to it.
We didn't even look at each other for a month. Finally, I decided to talk to him. He told me that I had no right to break up with him and he had every right to make me regret it. Yeah, I got ticked and walked off.
Then it happened, we got stuck in the same classes for the second semester. Did I mention for all classes? Yes. I was practally stuck with him, and he's determined to make me suffer. When in first block, I had to do a project, and I was assigned to do it with him. I did all of the work, and he took credit for it and said I did none of the work. The teacher believed him and I got a 50 while he got a 100.
Next, he started dating my best friend. Appearently she had a crush on him, but didn't tell me. He told me that he really dosn't like her the next day. I tried to tell her, but she said I was just jealous. She started talking about him non stop and was talking about how dare I break up with him. Then whenever I happened to be passing by, he would hold her hand or kiss her in front of me. Then I realized that he never kissed me or held my hand. It made me irritated that he would do that just to make me mad, but I ignored it. He would toss notes on my desk about all the stuff he would do for her, and I started throwing them away. Whenever I started doing something, he would say over my shoulder that I was doing it wrong, and I'd tell him to go away.
After a while, even through all the crap, I realized I still like him. It sucked! I couldn't get him out of my head, and he would constantly show up in front of me. My best friend even started taking his side, even when she knew all the crap he was doing to me because he would plan it with her. When I found out from another friend, she admited she did and talked about how fun it is. We then got into a fight and she refuses to talk to me. So I lost my best friend. And now I wonder what I even saw in them. They wern't like that before.
I feel like I should get someone else, so he'd leave me alone, but I feel like I would just be doing the same thing he is. I feel like I'm constantly complaining about him, but there's nothing I can do and all my friends are tired of hearing it. I can understand, and I'm tired of it to. I mean is there anything I can do? Can anyone tell me how to get him off of my mind? Please? I just want to go back to how things were before I started dating him!
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Posted: Fri Mar 28, 2008 5:49 pm
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Posted: Fri Mar 28, 2008 11:14 pm
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Posted: Wed Apr 02, 2008 10:12 am
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Posted: Wed Apr 02, 2008 2:39 pm
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Posted: Thu Apr 03, 2008 4:43 pm
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Posted: Fri Apr 04, 2008 4:39 pm
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Posted: Sat Apr 05, 2008 12:39 am
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yeah...EVERYONE HERE has a point. you should listen to them. look at yourself and what you're worth. stand up for yourself. you're no one's punching bag, as KIT3 said. keep yourself composed and walk w/ dignity, coz that'll really make them seem like fools compared to you. let the teachers in on it. it's your grade and that's permanent, so do what you have to do to prove your work. it is, after all, yours from the get-go. this harassment s**t needs to stop. i understand that as much as you try to bite back a retort, at times, you just want to shove something to their face to shut them to f*ng kingdom come. oh, and your friend...for them to be an accomplice to your suffering..they're not even worth crap. if you are to have some last parting words, choose them well, adn make sure your words has some bite to it, like a show stopper and words that allows you to have the finale. friends don't treat friends that way. first of all, they wouldn't even date an ex w/out your first opinion. they'd put your feelings into perspective first. don't let them ruin you. so figure out how you're going to manage that w/ dignity and respect for yourself.
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Posted: Tue Apr 08, 2008 3:28 am
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Posted: Wed Apr 09, 2008 9:32 pm
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HOLLYYYY smokes! (First off, what a friend.) But that's no place for me to be poking my head in. Heh, I wish you luck. Maybe just like start being a b***h and acting rude back at him? I dunno, it would be hard for me to do that. Also, you could also try finding a new boyfriend. I know that's not really the best solution, but maybe then he'd stop bothering you. However, you know probably real well, so that might not work. Btw, just by reading your paragraph thing you're like on my idol list. (Okay, you're not. No hard feelings, lol.) But standing up for yourself and not being pushed down (or at least trying) by this freak of nature, sex obssessed guy, GOOD JOB!
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Posted: Thu Apr 10, 2008 11:05 pm
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Posted: Sat May 10, 2008 5:47 pm
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Posted: Sat May 10, 2008 7:16 pm
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Posted: Thu May 15, 2008 2:08 am
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I was in almost the exact same situation, except that he broke up with me to be with my best friend he was cheating on me with. And that he was 8 years older than me. And he wasn't my first. Unfortunately, from my experience, things are not going to go back to the way they were before you met him or dated him. No matter how hard you try or try to pretend, things just aren't going to be the same. It will pass eventually, and you'll look back and wonder why you ever allowed yourself to be in a situation like this. He's obviously trying to make you jealous. And he's succeeding. Show him that you don't care. Spend some time alone and reflect. Start dating other guys casually if you're ready (and just so we're clear, dating is not the same as being boyfriend and girlfriend. Just because you're dating someone doesn't mean that you're treating them badly. Getting into a relationship after dating is a whole 'nother story). Treat him with a professional and courteous manner in school, and act like he doesn't exist the rest of the time. If he passes you a note, let the teacher know he's trying to disturb you from your studies. Same goes for your "friend." She obviously doesn't care about you as much as she used to. This is the kind of thing relationships can do to friendships. What you really have to ask yourself is what you really want. Do you want to be back together with him and have him treat you the same way that he treated you before? Or are you better than him, and know that you can find yourself someone more deserving of your love. No matter how much it hurts, you have to do what is in YOUR best interest. Not someone else's. I hope I could help you.
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Posted: Fri May 16, 2008 6:53 pm
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Ignore him. Stay as far away as possible. If that doesn't work, piss him off. It's actually quite simple, once you get the hang of it. I do it to this girl Jade who hates me all the time, because I hate her to.
Like what KitKat195 said, if you see them kissing, go: "Oh! How CUTE! You two will make beautiful babies!" Smile a really perky, cheesy smile, and walk off. That'll piss them off.
If he harasses you, saying things like: "You're doing this wrong." or "That answer is wrong." Or is harassing you by your looks and stuff, just agree.
Go: "I know. I do that on purpose, thanks for noticing!" when he tells you you're doing something wrong and smile.
If he tells you that you look ugly or something insulting, say: "Thank you! That was the idea, so happy you noticed." And, again, smile.
If anyone tells you that they hate or "strongly dislike" you, just say: "I love you too!!" All perky and annoying. Then walk off.
If this gets really out of hand with the harassing, then go to a teacher or someone. Most of the time they'll just tell the principal or someone then you and the boy will have a so called "Talk-That's-Supposed-To-Make-Everything-Better" and be done with it, and really it won't be. It'll just get you into deeper s**t with them. trust me, it's happened to me. Adults just don't understand.
When your Ex and Ex-BFFL realize that nothing they are doing is phasing you, they'll eventually stop. That's how I keep most people that I hate off my back, and it works every time.
The most hilarious part is when they try and make a comeback with a nasty comment and they can't find one. That's where it all pays off. You'll end up on top by the time they're done, and you'll be enjoying every minute of it!!
I hope you get this all figured out and behind you, and until you do I'll be checking back in here and helping you out. Peace for now, Lolly, I hope everything turns out okay.
heart ,
Yume mrgreen
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