It's funny... when you think you have a Happily Ever After how quickly it can be taken away. We hit the 5 year in remission point... thought were were out of the woods and now my father has Esophageal Cancer.
This time we don't have Kai; This time we just have each other and haunting painful memories of how life was just 5 years ago....
If I have learned nothing else, I have learned that life isn't fair. Life has a sick sense of humor.
We lost Kai... I'll lose my mind if I lose my dad.
Another Quest Thread, Whoop-Dee-Do I suppose… But this one is important to me and I think that I’ve finally healed enough that I would appreciate this rather than hurt miserably every time I think about it.
This is Swirly’s quest for her real life familiar, best friend, and chemo-dog – Kai.
I lost her on September 29, 2008. Kai was 3 years old, going onto 4 in 2009…
A short life, a burst of beauty and love and then gone. Going just as quickly as she came, but I’ll start at the beginning.
Also, as a sidenote -- This is a memorial for me... Something that hurts me to write but makes me smile through the tears... I'm going to be rather intensive on stories... Please keep with me. ((Sitting pretty, I only wish the shot showed her front paws))
Posted: Tue Jun 22, 2010 7:18 pm
The Beginning
((Taken at Novablu's Home. Kai's first ever picture. Wearing the collar that I slipped onto her at the Amishman's house. 6-7 weeks))
It was cold out, the end of January… just a couple of weeks away from my sixteenth birthday. I’d been going through a really rough spot, depression… anxiety… and all-in-all I was miserable. The teenage daughter that parents dread having entirely was me. I was repressed emotionally from my parents, rebellious, and sometimes spiteful. Of course, I didn’t see it that way, but hindsight is a Bit** sometimes.
My Dad came to me, my least favorite person, and sat me down for a talk. He was at his wits ends, mom was at her wits ends, and so was I. I’ll never forget what he said to me that day,
“Ann, We can’t keep going like this… Something has to give. How do you feel about having your own dog?”
I cried then, I’d wanted a dog since I was old enough to say the word, but my parents had a strict “one dog only” rule and our old Bassett Hound was well and truly my dad’s dog. I know to some people that seems like a buy-out. “Oh, your kid is a brat so you GIVE her something.” To me? It was like being given a slice of heaven and a reason to keep on going and to stay motivated with all I did.
A few days later dad had me go get in the car and go with him to our Amish neighbor’s house. They had puppies that were five-six weeks old and I could pick one out now, but he or she had to stay for another week or two. The pups were in a pig barn, warm and a bit smelly but not bad. Ten of them, the litter had been huge and beautiful. The mix a half-Doberman and a travelling sales man were the parents. I sat in the warm straw and had a lap filled with wriggly mostly long haired pups. They were the most uniquely colored puppies I had ever seen.. bright orange coats tipped with black. Black Doberman eyebrows and eyeliner even at that young of an age.
That’s when I saw her.
It was instant, final, and beautiful. There was my Kai-girl. The only puppy in the litter that was as short-haired as her mother, a pretty orange coat and distinctive black eye makeup. I put the tiny collar on her that I had brought after holding and cooing to her for a long while.
Once back in the car dad asked me, “So why that one?”
“She just is.”
Best decision I've ever made.
`Swirly
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Posted: Tue Jun 22, 2010 7:28 pm
The Days of Sneaking
((My front porch - Kai-lark at 5 months))
I mentioned in my last post the “Strict One-Dog Rule.” Well… Dad hadn’t exactly gotten permission to get another dog, he had decided it. I cannot remember my dad ever sneaking behind my mother… They’re truly partners on everything, but for this one thing he kept it from her. Together I worked with my dad over the next week or two to build a dog pen in the heated area of the lower barn. A cement floor covered in a thick bed of straw, toys galore, fencing high enough for a puppy to not be able to get out of, but low enough for me to just climb over instead of building a gate.
It was about a week and a half later when dad and I brought Kai home. I was in heaven, playing rolling around with her… a little kid again. She was loving even then when I knew she had to be confused to be taken away from her family and all on her own. It hurt like hell, but I knew that mom had no idea so I had to go back inside before she came home from work. I’d be able to go back out once she went to sleep… but I had to be away from my pup for about 5 hours. It seemed like a lifetime.
Well, that system worked for about 3 days.. until mom came in after work one day to unload grain she had picked up at the feedmill.
She just looked at me as I clutched my wiggling puppy, fearful as all holy hell, “Where did you get that?”
“I’m not telling you.”
“Where did you get the puppy?”
“I’m not telling you?”
“Where?”
“You can’t take her back, I won’t let you.”
“Oh for heaven’s sake.. where did you get her?”
“I won’t tell.”
We back back and forth like this for some time, my mother’s posture stern and I was fighting the urge to cry. (Something I did a lot of in those days) Finally mom gave in and started to laugh. She actually climbed into the pen with me and we spent some time playing with Kai together.
I knew I had won this round… but I still had a bigger battle to win.
Making Kai into a house dog.
…….. I never did tell her where the pup came from. I have no clue if dad ever did either.
Posted: Tue Jun 22, 2010 7:34 pm
Mission Accomplished
((Taken at Novablu's home. The toy is still referred to as "Bob" we played Kai out so much that day that we had a photosession she had no knowledge of. 8 weeks.))
Winter gave away and Kai was a bright eyed girl, smart as a whip and eager to please. Which worked out well for me since I adored her beyond anything I have ever known to this day. My goal was to get her into the house, I wanted that dog to be with me all the time… Not just if I was outside. I wanted a sleeping companion, my own personal best friend. If that’s greedy, so sue me.
I worked hard with Kai, training her in obedience and gentleness of mouth. She adored cats, was obsessed with horses, and knew better than to chase cars. It would have been perfect if I hadn’t been so demanding…
I started slowly, “accidentally” bringing her in when I needed a drink or somehow managed to “run out” of treats for training… Which led to her sleeping with me at night…. To dad taking her out when he left… and eventually I won.
Kai had managed to wrap herself around all of our hearts and she wasn’t going to go anywhere at least for a little while.
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Posted: Tue Jun 22, 2010 7:46 pm
The Beauty of Kai
((Taken at Novablu's home, 12 weeks old. ))
Kai and I had an idyllic year together… She was trained beautifully, perfect for me and the rest of the family loved her every inch as much as I did.
This story isn’t entirely sad… I have to show some of my girls quirks and sparkles.. the beauty of her that still gets to me anytime I think of her…
Kai’s pretties:: In some, if not most of the pictures of Kai I have she’s wearing a choke-chain. I never actually used the chain on her unless I was required to for showing obedience. Even then, it wasn’t used to be painful or brutal. It was one of her pretties. I’ve never known such a vain dog in my life. Kai would –pout- if she didn’t have some sort of pretty on. The choke chain was her favorite, if I took it off and then went to put it back on she would lunge through it. Once, I dressed her up in an old shirt and she laid down and refused to let me take it off until late that night… We bought a new Christmas tree when Kai was just shy of two and the box had a ribbon on it made of cheap plastic. As a razz I tied it around her neck in a bow. She refused to let me take it off, Kai wore that cheap piece of plastic until March when it finally broke off. Her other favorite game was for me to put a dishrag on her head “babushka” style as we called it. She’d frolic about, going to everybody in the house for compliments until the knot would come untied. Vanity on her, was beautiful.
Sit-Pretty:: When Kai would lay down, it was deliberate and amusing… She’d lower herself gracefully and cross her paws one over the other daintily.
Gentle!:: Gentlest mouth on a dog I’ve ever known, if offered food she would open her mouth and wait patiently for the food to be put in her mouth and released before she’d back away to chew it. Children too young to know any animal manners were safe around Kai, she never snapped, snatched, or got over-excited even if I had her favorite food.
Carb-Beast:: She loved carbs. Bread, cookies, bread, crackers, oh yes.. and bread. Once, I left a plate where I shouldn’t have to go grab a drink. The little hellion (only being all of… 6 months old and an opportunist at times) knocked my plate over. Now imagine this:: A giant smoked turkey leg, veggies, mashed potatoes, and two dinner rolls. What would your dog take and run? The meat. What did my brat take? The dinner rolls. She didn’t touch the turkey or anything else, she ran off with my bread. My parents used to bring her home crackers from restaurants just so they could make them into treats. Kai got to where she knew what a take-out box meant for her.
I’ll add more later… there are so so many more things I loved about her… it’s hard to find the best way to really describe my girl.
Posted: Tue Jun 22, 2010 7:56 pm
The First Battle
[[A usual for Kai, flipped back ear... as if she didn't have time to right them]]
It was May now, two months after the plastic bow and shriveled and died away and my parents were being sneaky. There were constant doctor’s appointments for dad and vague answers as to why they were going to the doctor’s office so often together. I’ll always remember the day I found out, it was May 4, 2007… The day before I bombed my SATs and the day my world was shaken badly.
Dad had pancreatic cancer.
The internet told me he was most likely going to die in 6 months, the doctors told him the same thing.
I cried, in the past year Kai had taken my dad from my least favorite person to my favorite… We had bonded through her and while I would have been upset before this, now I was truly devastated.
They operated and came out with good news, the cancer had not spread beyond 80% of his pancrease and his spleen. The surgeon had removed all signs and had given a hopeful prognosis. I remember that doctor still, he had kind eyes and even though the battle was just beginning… I believed that day everything was going to be okay… I was almost upbeat until I went into his ICU room.
I have to say this, there is nothing more terrifying than a child seeing their father hooked up to all those machines, so weak he couldn’t get out of bed or even brush his own hair…. I stood behind him that day in the ICU and brushed his hair and cried. This was my dad laying weakly in bed, the father that had taken me fishing and talked to me about being a better and stronger person when I was bullied at school…. Unable to even talk because he was too weak.
I went home that night and held Kai, held her and cried.
When dad came home from the hospital… it was a change.
Kai was no longer just mine.
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Posted: Tue Jun 22, 2010 8:07 pm
Chemo-Dog Keeps Sanity
((shot of humor, that'd be dad.. I'm sure he'd be THRILLED to be on Gaia... not))
The months of chemo were dark. No friend or visitors for fear of germs hurting my dad.
He had chemo, then radiation, then chemo and radiation, then another round of chemo.
I was out a lot during this time, a flake – it was too hard for me to grasp, but Kai was there.
I’d come home late at night from work to see dad sitting up, sick in his chair with Kai just standing beside him with her head on his knee. She was big dog, about 70 lbs and she couldn’t sit on his lap. I don’t know how many hours a day she spent just standing like that, but she was dutiful and wouldn’t leave his side for more than a few minutes. She would still come love on me, but then it was right back to dad.
Mom had to work, my sister was away at college, I had high school and work.. but dad always had Kai. She was with him 24/7, unless he was gone. Always there for him to weakly pet her head and get a lick on the hand.
I don’t know how dogs know when someone is sick, but Kai knew and she never budged.
As the months passed, light started to come into the house again… we could joke more.. dad could eat more than jell-o and popsicles. His frame was gaunt compared to the once santa-clause like father I had had. (White hair and beard included)
We were healing.
Then the official news came:: My dad was in remission, he had beaten the cancer and the treatments were going to stop. Oh, there will always be the 6 month check-ups and insulin shots from losing his pancreas.. but he was going to live. My dad had beaten the odds.
Posted: Tue Jun 22, 2010 8:15 pm
The Final Battle
((I cry almost everytime I see this picture, last digital shot taken of Kai))
Dad had healed, the house was happy again. All was right in the world.
And then it wasn’t.
My parents had gone out of town for the weekend, just for R’n’R and such… I was working and hadn’t wanted to get away. Just me and Kai for three whole days..? Life was perfect. It was on Friday night I realized her neck was swollen and strange looking.
I held her neck and felt the almost tennis ball sized lumps on each side of her throat. She was her usual happy self, but I didn’t approve of what I saw. Getting online I started to search, finding out it was her lymphnodes, I called my parents in a panic. There was really only one prognosis for swollen lymphnodes in dogs.
I checked the rest of her body, finding that all the rest were swollen as well just not as badly.
When they came home, they took Kai to the vet while I was at school… I rushed home that day and was given a hard blow –
Kai had cancer, and they couldn’t cure it.
I held her that day and sobbed til I felt like I was broken. We had just gotten through everything with my dad… Kai had only been three for a few months. The vet had given her pills and the prognosis that I would have my girl til November at the latest. My baby was going to die, and I couldn’t stop it.
The next week was a haze for me, between sobbing myself to sleep, crying on the chair in the living room holding her, or just crying at work. Nothing could console me. I remember the night that my father and I spent, sitting in the almost dark living room, both of us quietly crying as we told stories back and forth about Kai. Once again she had managed to strengthen our bond. Even when it was supposed to be about her she helped others and our tears were hurting her, she would pace between us, unsure. It was rough, but we both decided no more tears in front of her, she obviously knew something was wrong, but thought she had done something.
I had graduated high school in February and had nothing but work to do. I remember that first night at work, I leaned over the sink and cried for an hour while washing dishes, my managers thought I was insane. I knew what was truly wrong though..
My heart wasn’t just breaking, it was dieing.
`Swirly
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Posted: Tue Jun 22, 2010 8:22 pm
Goodbye For Now
((This picture is from my front porch, the last thing Kai ever saw was this and my family... I sat out there alone that night and have done so many nights since just for that feeling of closeness))
My parents had left the decision up to me, I got to decide when the vet would come out to our house to put her down. I requested 4 days off of work, the first to just be with her, the second for the deed to be done, and two days to wallow and sob like a child. I should have taken two weeks.
Kai had grown weak by then, she slept 22+ hours a day, only got up to eat a bit of food and she no longer had control over her bowels. I knew it was time, but god it hurt so bad.
On September 29, 2008 our vet, a man with snow white hair and electric blue eyes came to the house. I had her head in my lap, dad was sitting with her rump on his hip, stroking her, and mom was fluttering beside me.. too upset to be close. I remember I did not shed a tear as the vet looked her over and what he said to me made me feel… almost.. better?
He said, “You’re doing the right thing, this girl’s heart is strong… She could last a long time still but she’d be suffering. You are doing the right thing.”
I wanted to cry, god how I wanted to. I held my Kai as he injected her with the shot and murmured to her softly as she slowly went limp in my arms. The vet left quietly, not asking for anything… Just leaving. Once I knew it was over for Kai, over chemo-dog, I cried. I held her and cried until I couldn’t breathe or see. My parents both cried with me… the three of us were broken that day.
I carried my Kai to her grave that day… Said my goodbyes and I haven’t been back since. Soon I think, soon I’ll be able to go out and sit with her… but until then I have my memories and I have my pictures.
I miss you Kai, I miss you more than you’ll ever know.
Posted: Tue Jun 22, 2010 8:24 pm
Battle Weary, Round 2.
On November 30, 2013 -- My mom and dad had a talk with me. They needed to tell me that my dad's cancer was back. It was the exact same type of cancer cell as before but now it was in his Esophagus.
I lost it; sobbing like a train wreck.
My father, I remember told me bitterly a couple of months into his chemo and after his surgery had said, "I'll never have a major surgery again... If I get cancer again I would rather just die then be in this much pain again."
Those words came back like a punch in the throat, echoing like some sick cartoon birdies circling. Was it possible that he would stick to that? Had the cancer given him a death sentence? My mom had already talked him into the surgery and treatments... the doctors are "hopeful" the prognosis "brighter."
Here is what doctors consider good nowadays:
- 20% of people with his diagnosis live longer than 5 years after being diagnosed.
- 10% of people do not live through the major surgery that is required to re-shape the stomach/remove a few inches of the esophagus.
- 20-30% of people, after the surgery, wish they were dead instead of having gone through the surgery.
- If this round of cancer is defeated... He is highly likely to get it again; just somewhere else.
My father has made peace with death, he is calm, composed, and cheerful. "There are worse things than death, Toad.... There are worse things."
To be completely candid; I've never felt such helpless rage and bitterness.
Within the next 30-60 days my father will be going to a major medical center for a surgery that has the above statistics. If he does well he will be on a clear liquid diet and absolutely nothing solid for 5-6 months. If it goes poorly, he will be on a feeding tube.
I know that this doesn't affect Kai, obviously, but it's so wrong this time... We don't have our chemo-dog. My dad doesn't have his steady best friend this time. Nobody to stand at his knee for hours and hours.
I don't even know how to feel.
An update
Starting onward from 2013:
Dad's surgery was a failure; from radiation his esophagus has actually melted to his aorta. My mother, sister, her partner, and I were gathered for what was expected to be an 8 hour surgery. The hospital gave us a buzzer; much like a restaurant buzzer and it went off 2 hours in. Told us that the cancer is inoperable --
Since then we've been doing cryogenic freezing treatments and rounds of chemo. There's now a mass on his lung, but since he's undergoing chemo there's nothing to do besides continue on the chemo.
Day in and day out we're living with the knowledge that this cancer won't go away and that what we're doing is trying to extend length of life without getting rid of all quality of living.
My dad is weak, tired, and more and more often losing the ability to speak coherently. It hurts my heart so very much.
This is why I've been off of the internet so much, because of spending my free time with family while I have them. I think of Kai so much while dad is weak and trying to fight. She was always with him. Always. It was hard to get her to go outside sometimes because she didn't want to leave him alone.
More importantly; dad still misses her. On one of my last visits (in January '16) he was talking about her.
She's still chemo dog. Forever.
Onwards we trudge; continuing to fight.
`Swirly
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Posted: Tue Jun 22, 2010 8:26 pm
My Quest and A Request
Not all stories end in tragedy, but all end in bittersweet memories…
My request here is that if anybody has a story they want to share, or a quest they’ve done/completed.. please share it with me… I know I’d love to hear it, and I appreciate someone taking the time to read this.
WIP of Ref - huge img - bless both of you for the help, you know who you are.
Well, this is a horse shop and Kai was a dog.. so I don’t want to get a soquili that LOOKS like her. What I want is something that will represent her spirit to me. Her vanity, loyalty, intelligence, and beauty.
I’ll be filling out the form and it’ll go here along with references when I have them.
Posted: Tue Jun 22, 2010 8:27 pm
Status
This -is- a quest, so I have to put this here...
4.5million/4.5million - Complete!
Everyone of you are amazing beyond belief... I have enough now to try to get Kai as a flutter and I'm going to continue to work and try for slots... if it takes me long enough I'll get her as an angeni. I'm hoping to be able to get the Angeni of Bittersweet Memories.. it only seems fitting.
There are two other shops for now that I'd like to get my Kai girl made into... SoA and Lucky Noodle~ I'm going to put this here because frankly I don't have the heart to make up another thread.. I can move this is I need to .. just reallly don't want to repost the story.. Once was hard enough.
3 Million/3 Million
Next Quest
A Soq of my dad... Having a hard time figuring out the form/etc...
Will be megamutant (My dad loves bears so I want clawed feet.. I know that much)
0k/??? Million
`Swirly
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Posted: Tue Jun 22, 2010 8:28 pm
Donators
Kind folks that are helping make this happen::
Lobbu - A ridiculous amount - I'm shocked beyond belief. Kaitia (sp?) - Another ridiculouos amount... - I'm so thankful Yaesumuji - Again, I feel so blessed and awed by kindness Ririka - May I be able to show you the kindness you show me Falen - You've always been such a friend, thankyou<3 Pippi - You're such a sweetheart, thankyouu LydaLynn - Ohwow... Words fail me ;o; anemosagkelos - ;laskdfja;lsdfkj You guys are all amazing -- I'm running out of coherant thought bunnyilove - awwwwr thankyouuuuu Greenie 0_0 - your kind words and act made me smile Quiet_Wolf - Your message meant a lot to me.. I'm glad I'm not the only one that feels that way. Kesmi - You've always been so sweet to me, thank you<333 Sherlock Complex - Thank you for the kind message, too <333 [Eskimo] - D'awwr ;o; thankyouuuu Nori Ishida - <333 Mai Nori, always such a sweetie Moon_Princess_Yuki - <333 thankyouuthankyouuu GallusDomesticus - such a sweetie <33333 Cheshirekitty - d'ee <33333 Monsieur de La Nuit - thankyoumuch <3 XxXPandamoniumXxX - You're so sweet <333 Sarei - o.o thankyousomuch Apotropaics - I just... wat? Bless you and bear claws.
The Form::
Quote:
Edit Category: Heavy? Soquili Species: Angeni Body Build: Normal Gender: Female Starting Stage: Adult Concept Origin: This soquili is a memorial for my chemo-dog, Kai. The one point I want to make clear is that I don't want the soquili to look like a dog. It's essentially her spirit. I have a roughly done reference for hair - but the rest is sort of a CC. WIP Needed? : If it’s not a bother?
~*~ Colors & Markings ~*~ Body: Red-gold Face: Reference: Heavy, Heavy Eyeliner Mane: Flaxen – In a half up-do. On the way down I’d like twisted hair and braids, woven ornate hair. The reference has the up-do how I want but the length should be to the ground – layered down in loose curls – thiiick hair. Her pelt was soso thick .. I loved it ;o; X In the hair:: little sparkly bits/a few hair pins maybe like this – Pins The shiny things should be reds/oranges/whites – Whatever is complimenting Possibly strings of pearls? Tail: Flaxen – matching the mane – very thick/long/decorated like the mane – down to the ground Hooves/Fetlocks: Flaxen Reference Image(s): X As you can see she’s red-gold all over with high/low lights thrown in subtly – I’d like a very subtle pearlescent sheen to her too
~*~ Physical Traits ~*~ Horn(s): N/A Wings: Wing style 2, but I'd like the tips of them seeming to have feathers falling off, or transparent, like the symptoms of sickness are taking its toll there. (Not sure how to incorporate both, but try, or CC which looks best for the concept) Other Notes: If she could be transparant-ish starting from the legs down I'd be really happy - kinda misty, hooves fading away.. to mist. I'd LU for forevers. and if she can't be transparant then mist/clouds around her hooves -- full on ghost if allowed Sparkling – with some pearl ropes beaded about on her wings. Color – shiny flaxen-y white – possibly glittery? I want her to be glitzy/glamoury without being glitter-puke and over-done. *headdesk* which I have a tendancy towards..
~*~ Accessories & Edits ~*~ Trading Post Items: None~ Custom Items: The Headdress/Scarves: Headdress/Scarf – Not sure on the size, just to suit her. Necklaces:: - Plenty of slim Silver chains with one holding a silver pendant of the cancer ribbon - whatever size you choose is fine for the pendant (small - medium - large)
Bracelets:: Matching
Box:: I'd like a box set at her feet that is rusted, dark, grotesque, and over all evil in appearance. I want it to be seen as something no one would dare want to approach and fear.
Other possibility:: a few white candles at her feet -- off to the side by where the dreamcatcher is? if it looks too busy just nix it XD
A lot of this is CC… but I’d –really- like the option to make small changes when I see the WIP~ I really try not to be fussy, but Kai is/was an extremely important part of my life @__@
Reference Image(s) for Items:
~*~ Tag Specifics ~*~ Name of horse: Kai Owner: `Swirly Breed: Memorial OC Temper: Irreplaceable Mate: N/A Tag Background: X If that could be made to fit I’d be grateful, otherwise similar CC Tag frame color: CC Tag feather color(s): CC
~*~ Existing Pets ~*~ If you didn't design this yourself (and it's not a commercial cosplay), did you get written permission to use the design?: Uhh… N/A?
~*~ Angeni ~*~ Desired Domain: Bittersweet Memories Justification for Domain Choice (required if Getting Domain): This dog was mine/my family’s world. She got us through some really traumatic times… and in the end we lost her to the same vicious beast that she had gotten my family through. I know it’s dramatic or perhaps melodramatic but it’s how I feel… Dad and I still can’t talk about our girl without crying. I swear there are more pictures of her up around the house than of me. She was the best thing for my family in more ways than I can imagine…
Powers from Domain (required if Getting Domain): Kai can, briefly, bring a good memory back to a Soquili’s mind – make it as strong as if it’s actually happening (relive something near and dear to that Soquili) but – the moment only lasts as long as she is physically in contact with the Soq that she’s helping – and its very physically/mentally draining on her.
Personality (required In general): Kai is a healer, definitely not in the typical way. She doesn’t mend cuts or heal sickness but she brings a peace to those around her without being obtrusive. One need not tell what’s wrong – she’ll just know and comfort gently without getting in the way or expecting an explanation.
Plot ideas (required): I’d like to get Kai into a plot of some sort with her acting as a marriage councilor – I think it would be absolutely fun to have a couple on the verge of breaking a lifemating and be ‘healed’ so to speak by having their memories heightened and being the catalyst to work through their own issues. (I have a couple of mine that I can use for this… It’d be extensive self-RP but once I have that done – possibilities are endless) From there Kai could set her sights on helping a torn Soquili – someone that isn’t inherently evil (IE not a Kalona/Skinwalker/etc) but was raised to embrace darker tendencies -- to pull someone back from the brink or getting them to forgive themselves for an ‘unforgiveable’ act. I’m also toying with the idea of her helping a grief stricken mother through the death of a child (this again are my own Soquili’s and I don’t want to say that’s what I’m going to do when I know I want to do the above RP already @__@)
So yeah… /endramble.
Posted: Tue Jun 22, 2010 8:30 pm
If Anybody Else Is...
Questing for a beloved pet? Post your form here to share it or link it.. I'll list usernames with links.
Whatever shops, doesn't matter... It's not about the art it's about the memory.
