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Generally for me, it's the other way around, and that's a huuuuge freaking turn off for me. emotion_donotwant

When I go out with a guy, I like to live in the moment; go with the flow. Whenever I contemplate years down the line, I've either felt neutral or just cringe at the idea of children or marriage. Perhaps this is because I don't want either of those things for a good while yet (if at all), or perhaps it's because I've just not found 'the one' yet. I'd like to think that marriage is something that happens once you're already living together and you've established that you're going to grow old together, and I've found no one of the sort yet.

But yeah, thus far all of my ex's have mentioned their 'future plans' to me; how many kids they want, etcetera and that just freaks me out way too much. It's easy for a bloke to say stuff like that; they don't need to go through with the whole childbirth and mothercare crap. My most recent ex, I dated for about a year and a half then I realised it wasn't working, and I had just lost interest when I found out he was considering proposing. gonk It was just a huge big no-no to me; hell we hadn't even lived together, and that's a big enough step in itself without cramming it all into one package.

Financially, I don't share my money with anyone; the only thing I would consider sharing financially is the likes of a mortgage for a house, in which me and my partner had already previously had experience in living together.

I guess it all boils down to the fact that I've never yet had a steady relationship that's exceeded 18 months, therefore before the 2 year barrier is broken (if it ever will be) with a future relationship, then I'll never ever consider more of a future with the person. I'll just see how things go as far as the relationship's concerned first. I'd never ever want to feel like I'm pushing myself into a corner.

Yeah; I guess my biggest fear for me is to make a hasty decision then regret it later. emotion_sweatdrop
And if it's a decision that I'll have no chance of getting out of (e.g. pregnancy, mortgage), then I'll want to avoid it wherever possible.

Well, I had to recently end a relationship with this guy because he was moving too fast for me. "We should go to the same college. We should get married. We should have like 3 kids and a dog named Spot."

NO.

That's annoying when people are planning my future for me. I'm not very eager for going to a community college when I've been accepted to a better one. I'm not very excited for a ring to be placed on my finger. I don't need that weight right now. And kids. I don't want to explain that. He wanted the picket fence house family. I cannot give him that. Maybe someone else.

Thanks. heart

I started dating a man who was essentially my "best friend" so he knew what I wanted, and I knew what he wanted before we started "dating".
Also.. we moved in together BEFORE we made it official.. only a few hours before.. but still! Clearly we were determined to make it work and we had a lot of the same goals.
We are both headed in the same general direction, we both want the same things in life, our "timelines" are very similar, our ideas, ******** nearly everything is so much alike it's crazy.

We've been together for nearly four years and everything is just awesome. We're working towards our goals together, we are support systems for one another.

I have my life partner, I know I will be with this man for the rest of my life. I couldn't be happier. heart

I dated someone for a year and half.. we lived together as well.. he was my first "serious" boyfriend.. I wanted to make it work, but everything was all wrong. Our priorities were different, our morals, our life goals, our EVERYTHING was different. sure it was great being 16 and 17 with him.. but that was it.. we were never going to last and I felt as though I was just wasting time being with him.
As much as he loved me, and as much as he begged me to stay.. I would have been ******** miserable and in turn he would have been too. He might not have realized it at the time.. but a few years down the road he would.

You only have one life, why waste it with someone you are miserable with.

AHAHAHAHAHAHAHA Oh god... ohhh oh oh oh.. oh that is so funny. *wipes tear* Okay, I just wanted to thank you so much for making me laugh so hard.

Yeah, that was moving way too fast. I know exactly what you mean. Someday... perhaps but not right now.

I've only dated 2 guys in real life. I really liked them both but the first one like all the same things i did, we had the same goals. But i have no idea why feel apart. All i know is that, after we spent a weekend together and he went back to school he cheated on me. He thought that because i didn't come to school after that weekend that i was saying "I don't want to be with you" emo
It broke my heart and i basically kicked him in the balls for what he did to me. We've been good friends ever since and that's all we ever will be. So really it was on his part that he didn't trust me enough to talk to me about anything. Even if he spent weeks crying cause "he cheated on me" I made it clear i wasn't happy with what he did. We were dating for 2 years and i was considering losing my virginity to him. But then it was a slap in my face for thinking about really. I'm sort of glad that i didn't lose it to him because it opened my eyes really. I'm still a virgin and i don't want to lose to someone that i don't trust at all. Not to mention he has dated all my friends... *that just proved to piss me off more* So i don't talk to him for a long time. But now i'm more or less over it all.. I still hate him for what he did but i've learned a lot from it.


My second boyfriend i just didn't plan for anything to happen and just go day by day with it. But he wanted to plan things out and i told him what happened in my first relationship he said he was fine with it. That he understood and then the next day he broke up with me and it was like wtf? So really in around about way... Until i meet a guy that i trust fully and fully know him... I'm not dating because i'm tired of dating liar's and asshats. He is married to my ex best friend and they have a kid and house together already... I refuse to talk to them both.


But i'd have to say... That i thought my first boyfriend was going to work out but i saw that it wouldn't after i got cheated on. In retro spect until someone can prove that they trust me. I'm not touching that boyfriend girlfriend thing until then...

But when you do meat someone you want to stay with it will show. ^__^ i look at my mom and dad and what they have i would love to have... but just a tad bit different.