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Posted: Wed Dec 05, 2012 10:19 pm
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Posted: Wed Dec 05, 2012 11:04 pm
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Posted: Wed Dec 05, 2012 11:20 pm
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Posted: Wed Dec 05, 2012 11:30 pm
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Posted: Wed Dec 05, 2012 11:49 pm
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Posted: Thu Dec 06, 2012 1:23 am
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Posted: Thu Dec 06, 2012 1:25 am
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Posted: Thu Dec 06, 2012 1:28 am
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Posted: Thu Dec 06, 2012 7:54 am
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Posted: Thu Dec 06, 2012 8:37 am
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Posted: Thu Dec 06, 2012 9:56 am
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Posted: Thu Dec 06, 2012 3:04 pm
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o0Roxy0o Is there something wrong with me?
To get straight to the point, I'm a horny 17 year old. And for some reason, it's gone. I never feel 'in the mood' anymore and it always feels like a task instead of a pleasure. I don't blame my boyfriend, but I feel sorry for him.
Our relationship is doing so well in all other aspects, so why can't I get myself to feel excited anymore? I used to watch any movie with sex and get excited, now, I feel nothing.
Help?
Girl, there is nothing wrong with you. It happens to a lot of chicks, really—even me, and I'm only a year older than you!
I sort of had the same problem with my boyfriend. We've been dating for a little over a year now, and around 7 months I sort of got uninterested by the thought of sex. And, as Gigi mentioned, our sex life also fell into a routine. Like, very vanilla sex with minimal variation.
Oh yeah, and we also have to keep quiet if his parents are home. At first, it was thrilling because we could've been caught ... but now it sucks because I like being loud. ( > ////// < );;;
You can always try to find a way to get your parents out of the house (point out events they might want to go to for cheap, like LivingSocial opportunities; perhaps there'll be a wine-and-cheese tasting nearby~) and once they're out of the house, you can get as wild and crazy as you want. Maybe try having sex in a different room than usual, like in the shower/bathroom, kitchen counter, dining room table, living room couch (whatever) during this opportunity.
The way I sorta solved this was experimenting with a tiny fetish of mine (him dominating me in bed,) but nothing too serious, just holding me down, going really rough—but going slower if it hurt me—or a spanking here or there. If you have any sort of sexual fantasy, you should try imagining it, just like thinking about if you and your BF were acting it out. If he's usually 'in charge' during bed, maybe it's time that you hold him down and ride him like a cowgirl~! ;D LOL. Or the opposite, if you're the one on top, haha!
One way that usually turns me on is just hearing about how attractive I am, and how much I turn my BF on, even if, in truth, I'm self-conscious about some body parts of mine. My BF would say things that start out like "I love it when ..." or "It turns me on how you ..." and "You make me horny when ..." Maybe you need to hear how awesome you are in bed in order to want to get in bed more. Hearing the effect you have on someone is a big, big ego boost, and makes you feel like a sex goddess.
Also, I also had a period where I felt like being sexual was more of a task. How I got over that? I just kind of tuned in on my BF when we were foolin' around, and I realized that I was the only one who could make him feel that way, and that felt really empowering. Now, it's like a challenge in my head, sort of: like, how can I make him feel even better the next time, how can I top myself? And it's not just about him, it's about me too! I regularly try to spice it up. I blatantly suggest how my BF should touch me in different ways, especially if what he's doing is not turning me on at all: faster or slower, having a rougher or softer touch, placing his hands on different places, etc.
Another thing you can try is just touching yourself, not sexually. Explore your body (or let your boyfriend do it, instead!) Let him touch you in different ways all over your body. Find your erogenous zones. For example, me and my BF were cuddling in bed—naked—and he just started to run his fingers really lightly up and down my legs and thighs and that got me soo hot n' bothered. There's more to it to making a girl horny than just her tits and her p***y: go find those places that make you begging him to touch you more, girl! ;D
One thing that gets me out of a "dry" spell is writing or reading really naughty stories/fanfiction. I heard that erotica was more effective for women than porn or videos were, because they can, as I said, imagine it.
You can also try some new sex toys, or flavored lube! Or even whipped cream, if you're cheap like me. Maybe you need some added stimulation? A vibrator incorporated in your sex life might be fun, but if you don't have access to getting one, you can also find similar sensations from a detachable shower head. My shower time dramatically increased when the shower head was replaced with a detachable one with different settings ... So much fun!
I have to ask, are you on the pill, or any sort of hormonal birth control? That is one way that can lower a lady's sex drive. I found that this was a contributing factor to my lowered sex drive, but then I got my prescription adjusted slightly (because I experienced some slight mood swings too) so now I'm back to normal and horny as ever, hahaha.
Few, that was long. Hopefully that gave you some interesting ideas to try~!
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Posted: Fri Dec 07, 2012 1:12 am
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Wow, this helped a lot! emotion_hug
I honestly do think it's the whole 'Parents are home, I don't want to get caught' thing. I'll speak to him and ask him to wait until they are out again, that way I can also give myself a break from sex.
I do feel we're stuck in a pattern, I'll definitely have to do a room change or something. It's always the same. We snuggle, foreplay, sex, sleep. It's like we can't have a sleepover without it and I honestly hate it.
As for toys and such, we've always been speaking of using cream or even that chocolate sauce or ice cubes. Although, none of that happens. I think him and I should make more of an effort to be more creative.
Thanks again for your help, I really feel a lot better about the situation now. emotion_bigheart
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Posted: Fri Dec 07, 2012 11:32 am
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Glad to have helped~♥
Everyone goes through this now and again, and sometimes it's hard to break out of habit if the circumstances aren't right. But don't worry, I'm sure that you'll be able to get your sex life back to wild and awesome.
> u <; Instead of sleeping, try going to the couch and watching the telly afterwards—dressed or undressed, howeve. For some reason me and the BF are much more talkative after we've did the dirty, so we might spend an hour cuddling in bed and just talking about random stuff or go to the living room, channel hopping and watching late night television (like Dave's Old Porn, where two comedians watch vintage porn and make fun of it together). Then we'll get in the mood again after we've had a little break time to rest up and relax.
If any of the tables in your kitchen is strong enough, I suggest fooling around a lil on that. But make sure you clean up/have a towel beneath you, haha.
Oooh, ice cubes are really, really fun! I totes recommend that. If he uses it down there, make sure he makes it warm again with his tongue~! ;D Vice versa with him, too. Suck on an ice cube before you go down on him and see how he likes it.
Lots of variation is the key to a good sex life. Have fun, dearie~! I'm sure your BF will be super turned on by your enthusiasm and new ideas. (;
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Posted: Tue Dec 11, 2012 2:16 am
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