Welcome to Gaia! ::

The pen hovered over the piece of paper. The letter had a heading- it wasn't hard to write Dearest Mother and mean it with all of one's heart. But the rest of the words got stuck. They lingered in a world that seemed so far away now, so removed from the reality she knew now.

Keleres bit her lip, not quite hiding an uncharacteristic frown. Candidates milled around in the barracks, but the young redhead straddled two worlds, seeing both Rivercrest and Western as she stared into empty space.

Marinel noticed his friend Kel sitting and writing. She didn’t seem to be in her usual good spirits, and he had a feeling a bubblypie wouldn’t cheer her up.

Instead, he headed over to her. “Writing home?” He asked. He knew the feeling. While he didn’t have parents to write home to due to Thread, he had people from his caravan he still liked to keep in contact with.

Kel looked up as Mari approached her, a brilliant smile replacing her frown. Around him, it didn't feel like a mask, either. Well, not too much. Her heart still twisted a little- if Mari ever found out... would he judge her?

"Life has changed so much for us. It's hard to put it into words. What would you say to your parents, if you could?" Ceylisse wasn't her birth mother, but she was as close to a mother figure as Keleres could remember having.

Oh! She was smiling now. Marinel hesitated, but then his expression relaxed. He echoed her bright smile. She was different from any other candidate he’d met. He felt different. As if he had just as much value as his brother. It was a new feeling, and it wasn’t unwelcome. He’d always been second best.

“I suppose I’d ask my father if he were proud of me,” he offered. “My mother died giving birth to me, but I always heard I was more like her. I would write to her and tell her all about my life, I guess, and tell her about my friends. Like you, Kel. How I ran from home and was reunited with Dolly. And probably about how I’m trying to get a dragon, too.”

Her mouth widened in surprise, her jaw dropping open. "Oh, I'm so sorry for your loss. I had no idea. You must think I'm so insensitive..." She glanced away, an expression of pain flickering through bright green eyes.

In an effort to steer the conversation to a better place, she took another tact. "Those sound like good words, Mari. Would you mind if I borrowed them?" She tried to make her smile light and easy, in a semblance of humour, but the pain still lingered in her gaze. "My mother lives in Rivercrest. Her name is Ceylisse." For the first time since she had been adopted, mentioning her name lit a spark of hurt in her heart, and she looked down at her letter.

Ceylisse, as a concept, seemed so strange now. With the veil of Weyrlife to shape her judgement, living in a brothel seemed a lot... worse... than she had realised. What had once seemed a matter of honour and compassion now held a layer of amoral. Would people judge her? Would Mari judge her?

She forced the pain to the back of her mind. The pen still hesitated in her mind. "I miss her. I don't miss that life, though. Have you been to Rivercrest before?"

“What? No! I’m not sad.” He’d never met the woman, he couldn’t really miss her, could he? He did wonder what having a mother must be like. That didn’t make him any different from a weyrbrat, really, did it?

“Go ahead,” he said. “I’m not a harper, though. My brother’s the wordsmith.” He wasn’t sure he was altogether talented with words, but woodcraft was another thing entirely. “You must miss her, being in this new place,” he said, with understanding. “Are you going to tell her about the dragons?”
“I don’t think so,” he said. “What’s it like?”

"Oh." She found herself saying, wondering if it was easier to not feel things about people you didn't know? Perhaps she was a bit too much of a bleeding heart? Somehow, the thought made her smile. It was better to know you were something than to not know at all! Still, had she been in Mari's shoes, she might have been mournful. She mourned not remembering her own parents, and her sister... She brushed her cheek absently with her index finger, and for a brief moment lost herself in the space on the far wall once more.

"Is he now? I had no idea! A wordsmith and a rider. That makes a potent combination." She wore a bit of a charming smile, a hint of mischief in that enthralling gaze. When he asked about her telling her mother, she nodded. "She knows why I'm here- she agreed to let me be Searched. I wrote to her after I failed to Impress last time... Perhaps it would be best to wait until I had more news of clutches and dragons. It feels... strange to try and tell her about normal weyrlife." But Mari wouldn't understand the essence of the differences, if he hadn't felt Rivercrest deep in his body, like she did.

"Rivercrest is pretty on the outside. Flashy, full of glamour. A life of luxury wrapped up in airs and pretenses. It's beautiful, really. Or it can be. It has its darker side. It's a place of heartbreak and hurt- maybe more so than others... Although perhaps not as much as Nabol? It is a Hold of entertainers, to put it politely." She ran a hand through her hair, distracted, but also endeared to him. Mari was so innocent and sweet. She felt like she was allowed to be her own person around him; no matter what, he couldn't judge her. He couldn't have a reason to dislike her, if he had never experienced Rivercrest.

“At least, I’ve always thought he was good with words,” he offered. “He has a way of getting his way. He’s much more eloquent than I am.” He hesitated and frowned slightly. He’d never experienced having a mother, but he figured they didn’t just want to hear highlights of weyr life. “I think you should write her,” he said. “She might worry if you don’t. I mean... you know her. Would she worry without word from you?”
Pretty on the outside, rotten on the inside? Hm. Like a redfruit that had bruised on the inside. Mari nodded at the comparison to Nabol. He understood now.
“It sounds like a place I wouldn’t go,” He said, “I’ve met enough courtesans and harpers here.” He offered her a smile. “You don’t have to go back there, if that’s what was causing your frowny face earlier.”

"Oh." She raised her brows at him, smile quirking a little. "He sounds like the overly charming sort... Make sure he doesn't boss you around too much, okay?" She managed a grin, and tilted her head. Mari knew his brother well, surely he'd be okay... Still, the young man before her was very sweet. She kind of felt the need to protect him- from the world outside.

"You're right. I should. I'm just not sure what I should say. Maybe just... keep it brief... She would worry, that is certain." The pen fell to the paper, and she began to scribble in an elegant hand, the sudden scratchings music to her ears.

Weyrlife is a well-oiled machine, from lessons to training, I feel like I am becoming a whole new person. The people are very different too, and I'm making more friends. I hope you are proud of me.

She paused again, looking up to smile at Mari and holding his gaze. "It's definitely a place in which you need to be careful, but it can be beautiful in the right company. I'd like to show you, someday, if you would come. If we Impress. Perhaps we can make a promise?" As for her frown, she chuckled a little. "Sometimes, I have too much time to think. And overthinking isn't always the best way of speaking to your loved ones- it should come from the heart, right?" The smile on her face was true and sincere. As before, Mari had somehow brought out a side of her that seemed more genuine than she had thought possible.

Boss him around? Marinel smiled at that. If only. He missed his brother’s pushy advice. “He’s busy bossing his dragon,” he said, “but he is. I could never hope to be as charming.”

She seemed nervous about writing her mother, Marinel observed. He couldn’t help but wonder why. “You could,” he said. “But you don’t have to. There’s plenty of paper available and there’s always ink.” She had such nice hand writing! He wasn’t looking close enough to read it, but the way she shaped her letters...

What? She was inviting him there? He hesitated. It really didn’t sound like his sort of place, from the way she’d described it. But maybe if she were there with him it would be better. “We could go together,” he said and offered her a smile. “Sure. When we Impress.”

Kel tilted her head a little at Mari's comment. He didn't seem upset or even perturbed, but it didn't sit well with her to think that he might want to be someone other than himself. "You're perfect the way you are. No need to be charming when you are sincerely sweet." The manner in which she spoke, so matter-of-fact-ly, took the complimentary shine from her words and turned them into a bare truth.

When it came to the letter, Kel was running out of ideas. It was hard to say exactly how she felt. It would be the kind of thing they would drink tea over, after a long night (or day) of working. Letters were a way of bridging distance, but they couldn't foster intimacy in the same way a look might, or a cup of klah. "Maybe I'll try and sketch a picture of the Weyr, or a dragon, instead? They say a picture speaks a thousand words." She smiled at the thought, though she knew she was no artist.

Her heart skipped a beat, and she flushed a little. Suddenly, the prospect of sharing that part of her world with him seemed daunting. He didn't seem keen or comfortable, and afterall, she barely knew him! She knew how she had come to feel around him- which was a little bit more normal- but that was what friendship did, right? No sense in dragging your friends through Between-on-Pern. "You don't have to if you don't want to!" She laughed, realising her mind was taking a step back, and her instincts were taking over once more. No, it would be best if he wasn't subjected to Rivercrest. At least, not her Rivercrest. "Sorry, I shouldn't have asked in the first place." A coy veil of thick eyelashes, a slightly downturned regard, and she set herself back to her letter with all the primness and propriety of some fair lady.