cutting

[WindAndFire]

I CAN'T stop cutting and I seriously don't know what to do. I've gone through phases of cutting and not cutting, but I always seem to start again. I can't stop. My legs have probably over 100 scratches and cuts on them now, I tend to make 20-30 at a time. It started as a system of self-punishment, but now I just don't have control over it. Does anybody else have this problem? What should I do?  

[Tarrien]

Why do you cut? And can you stop the cause? Avoid it? If you can avoid it the cause- Then DO so.

Cutting is more trouble than it's worth, it takes too much time and energy to hide the scars.

If you're really REALLY upset, distract yourself with something else. Cutting is a way to distract yourself by concentrating on something.

Go on a run, walk or read a book or draw. Hell, if it makes you feel better draw yourself cutting rather than actually doing it, worked for me when I was upset enough to cut. Even that way the evidence is easier to hide/ get rid of. And you don't have to be a great artist either, I doubt you want to show it off later.... Don't do it if you're going to cut afterwards though.  

[Black_Daggers]

I had the same issue

hide or put away watever ur using to cut yourself with, itll stop some temptation

also if u wanna cut try holding an ice cube in ur hand for a long time, apparently it gives the same affect without hurting your body

Also finding the source of your problems is a good start to stopping  

[Sotur]

Black_Daggers

I had the same issue

hide or put away watever ur using to cut yourself with, itll stop some temptation

also if u wanna cut try holding an ice cube in ur hand for a long time, apparently it gives the same affect without hurting your body

Also finding the source of your problems is a good start to stopping

she's very right, black_daggers is. tho i'd never tried the ice thing [thanks for the tip, btw], it makes sense that it would work, for cutting IS, like fenera said, attempts at distracting oneself from something. indeed, something must be causing it. as for the self-punishment thing....i don't think that's right. if u don't mind me asking, what did u do that u thought u had to punish urself? without knowing, i can't be specific in my reply to it, but either way, i think it's not right. i used to cut, until i realized it's not worth it. for starters, hiding the scars is a pain. 2nd, the problem isn't solved, and 3rd, u get another problem by wanting to stop cutting and not being able to bcs ur body already associates the pain of cutting with a type of relief, in which case it becomes harder. so, yeah, bottom line, get rid of anything u might b able to cut urself with [reduce/stop temptation], and distract urself with something. writting could also help. letting out the steam, scribbling down evrything that's bothering u. after it, if u r scared of it falling into the wrong hands, dispose of it [if hiding it isn't enough]. that way u'll have let it out, and after getting rid of it, u won't have to worry about someone finding it.  

[WindAndFire]

Sotur

Black_Daggers

I had the same issue

hide or put away watever ur using to cut yourself with, itll stop some temptation

also if u wanna cut try holding an ice cube in ur hand for a long time, apparently it gives the same affect without hurting your body

Also finding the source of your problems is a good start to stopping

she's very right, black_daggers is. tho i'd never tried the ice thing [thanks for the tip, btw], it makes sense that it would work, for cutting IS, like fenera said, attempts at distracting oneself from something. indeed, something must be causing it. as for the self-punishment thing....i don't think that's right. if u don't mind me asking, what did u do that u thought u had to punish urself? without knowing, i can't be specific in my reply to it, but either way, i think it's not right. i used to cut, until i realized it's not worth it. for starters, hiding the scars is a pain. 2nd, the problem isn't solved, and 3rd, u get another problem by wanting to stop cutting and not being able to bcs ur body already associates the pain of cutting with a type of relief, in which case it becomes harder. so, yeah, bottom line, get rid of anything u might b able to cut urself with [reduce/stop temptation], and distract urself with something. writting could also help. letting out the steam, scribbling down evrything that's bothering u. after it, if u r scared of it falling into the wrong hands, dispose of it [if hiding it isn't enough]. that way u'll have let it out, and after getting rid of it, u won't have to worry about someone finding it.

Hmm, self punishment... Well, I originally started when my dad got cancer, and then I didn't stop for a while. Now it's like if I do anything wrong, if I make mistakes while I'm driving (aka not looking both ways 2-3 times before I make a left turn), if I eat junk food, if I fail an audition, if I fail a test/quiz at school.....basically whatever mistakes I make during the day, I think about at night and scrape up my skin accordingly.
And as for hiding scars, I'm already in deep water. I tried on a pair of my exercise shorts today to see if maybe I could wear them next week for drumline conditioning, and about an inch of cuts showed. scream I'm screwed.  

[Black_Daggers]

::note:: i just got on fake nails and im getting used to typing with them so if my spelling is bad i apologize

you cannot punish yourself for every little thing you do wring. you are only human. i used to do the same thing. if you punish yourself for eating wrong or saying something wrong, it not only affects your physical health, but your mental health as well.

i used to beat myself up because of little things, but i kept thinking about it and worked myself over about 1 little mistake that most people didnt think about, wether it was an outfit choice, something i said, or if someone didnt talk to me.

you need to remember, you make mistakes just like everyone else, the only difference is u feel you have to punish yourself.

just like sotur said, get it out, not on your skin, but on paper andmaybe just scream, or talk to someone. im having a problem right now and i broke down crying-a lot actully- but what helped is that i called people seeking guidence and it made all the difference.

Get it out of you then and review it later and if u feel an urge ask yourself is this really worth remembering, is it worth seperating my skin to leave a maark for this person or thing that happened.

hope thats helpful  

[Sotur]

ok, u REALLY shouldn't punish urself for that. some things just happen, and i don't need to tell u that the scars make living a hell. mistakes happen, a lot. and it's ok. it happens to evryone. i mean, for instance, the not looking b4 turning left...heck, if i punished myself ofr evrytime i made a mistake while driving i'd probably have lost all my blood by now. just a few days ago i hit the side rear-view mirror, got it out of place. i just tried to fix it, and that;s it. we r human, we can't be perfect. like black_daggers said, it isn't worth it. think about that when u get the urge to cut. and i'm not gonna lie to u, u WILL have the urges, even while u've stopped, u WILL have the urge to do it. but u'll have to be strong, u'll have to think it through, and stiop urself from doing it. i still get urges sometimes, but i fight them back, i find alternative ways of letting the steam out. and i know dealing with cancer sucks,. my bro is a cancer patient, so trust me, i know. it's hard, it hurts, it pressures u, ruins concentration, all of those things, i know they happen, i went thru them. but it's important, VERY IMPORTANT, that u do NOT hurt urself. find other ways, there are plenty. back on the self-punishment, again: it't not worth it. i know failing exams suck, all students know that. but instead of hurting urself, learn from it. if u fail,it might be bcs u didn't study enough. try other technics of studying, other habbits, but don't hurt urself. the cut isn't gonna change nor help ur grade, whereas making a change in ur study habits could make a great difference.  

[London Goth Goddess]

WindAndFire

I CAN'T stop cutting and I seriously don't know what to do. I've gone through phases of cutting and not cutting, but I always seem to start again. I can't stop. My legs have probably over 100 scratches and cuts on them now, I tend to make 20-30 at a time. It started as a system of self-punishment, but now I just don't have control over it. Does anybody else have this problem? What should I do?

Well, the good thing here is that you do know that there is a problem with it. I agree with the others to resist the temptation to hide or get rid of the things that you cut with. I've never had the problem, but one of my friends did, and stopping was the hardest thing that she'd ever done to date.
It's mostly in your head, a system of self-punishment, except that you lost control over it. You have to get it in your head that you are above the cutting, and you can stop it.
Don't give up, and good luck.  

[Ayllin]

Obviously I think you should quit immediatly, but it may be just too hard. Possibly find a less painfull way to 'punish yourself' and every week do less and less untill your mind's out of the system. They say it takes 3 weeks to break a habit. Maybe start scratching yourself with your nails, and then cutting your nails so short that they can't cause you any harm. Keep making the punishments less and less untill you just don't do anything at all. I HIGHLY encourage you to try the other's advice, but sometimes steps are easier than just out-right quiting. And you've already done the first step- to just about any problem- admitting it.

I dunno, maybe my advice is a bunch of bull and will only make things worse. If you can just hide the stuff and quit, by all means do it. But if your having problems with quiting maybe it's worth a try.  

[baigais]

Stray from self-punishment and go towards self-discipline.

You have the tools to hurt yourself, so put them away somewhere where you can't get them back. I went through a relapse with cutting after stopping for a long period of time, but I was so afraid that my parents were going to catch me, or find what I was using to harm myself, so I put the tool in a compartment in my desk that has a lock on the door and I locked it.

Well, apparently the lock was very broken because the thing is still in there and I can't unlock it again. But to my surprise, I don't feel the urge to do it anymore. I used to cut while water was heating up for my shower, now if I get the feeling that I want to purge my imperfections, I write a poem in a notebook and hide it under my bed.

If you keep the tools that you are using to hurt yourself, the temptation will always be there. You can't let go of the habit completely if you can't let go of the object that helps you carry it out.

Your mistakes and imperfections are Persian flaws, they're the things that make you you, the things that make you beautiful. Don't be ashamed for a bad grade on a test/quiz, eating junk food. It's not your fault that you're human. Or that anyone else is. It's painful to have someone that you love get sick, but they're not leaving you.

Things happen that you can't control, but it's a part of life.
It helps to cry, too. Might sound cheesy, but it can be very healthy, in my opinion.

Crying for me is like cutting. sending the pain out, wiping it on my sleeve and just breathing for a while. Take a bath and cry for a bit, breathing in steam and just send the pain down into the sewers for the day.
It will take time, but if you really want to stop the habit, you will need to work at it. It's not an overnight thing.

Good luck-
Jiji
PS- Buy some longer shorts, and you'll be okay.  

[WindAndFire]

Ioji

Stray from self-punishment and go towards self-discipline.

You have the tools to hurt yourself, so put them away somewhere where you can't get them back. I went through a relapse with cutting after stopping for a long period of time, but I was so afraid that my parents were going to catch me, or find what I was using to harm myself, so I put the tool in a compartment in my desk that has a lock on the door and I locked it.

Well, apparently the lock was very broken because the thing is still in there and I can't unlock it again. But to my surprise, I don't feel the urge to do it anymore. I used to cut while water was heating up for my shower, now if I get the feeling that I want to purge my imperfections, I write a poem in a notebook and hide it under my bed.

If you keep the tools that you are using to hurt yourself, the temptation will always be there. You can't let go of the habit completely if you can't let go of the object that helps you carry it out.

Your mistakes and imperfections are Persian flaws, they're the things that make you you, the things that make you beautiful. Don't be ashamed for a bad grade on a test/quiz, eating junk food. It's not your fault that you're human. Or that anyone else is. It's painful to have someone that you love get sick, but they're not leaving you.

Things happen that you can't control, but it's a part of life.
It helps to cry, too. Might sound cheesy, but it can be very healthy, in my opinion.

Crying for me is like cutting. sending the pain out, wiping it on my sleeve and just breathing for a while. Take a bath and cry for a bit, breathing in steam and just send the pain down into the sewers for the day.
It will take time, but if you really want to stop the habit, you will need to work at it. It's not an overnight thing.

Good luck-
Jiji
PS- Buy some longer shorts, and you'll be okay.

Crying, eh?
It sounds so very...therapeutic (can't spell...) But the problem with that is when I start to cry people think the apocalypse must be coming or something because I very rarely cry. Then everybody starts asking questions I really don't want to answer, but...whatever. Perhaps I shall try crying in the solitude of my room.
Although I did knida sorta find an antidote: exercise (LOTS of excerise).
If I'm phsyically exhausted at the end of the day, I usually just crawl in bed and read a book because I don't have the energy to do anything else. That being said, I need to go workout.  

[Paradoxive]

Where leg guards?
I don't know, cutting is quite stupid and should never be a result of self punishment. Think about it like this. What if you got out the shower and your parental figuers saw it? Would it be worth scaring the hell out of your mother and having to go to a therapist for your life? though it would be interesting.  

[Sotur]

lots of exercises is VERY good, and it even helps u sleep. the few times i went to a psychologist, she told me that i should try exercising to see if that would help my sleeping...my sleeping sucks. i wake up TONS of times trhu the night....no rest at all. so she said that exercising releases this hormone that induces relaxation, which in turn helps the person sleep trhu the night. point being...EXERCISE IS A GREAT SUBSTITUDE FOR CUTTING!!!  

[WindAndFire]

Paradoxive

Where leg guards?
I don't know, cutting is quite stupid and should never be a result of self punishment. Think about it like this. What if you got out the shower and your parental figuers saw it? Would it be worth scaring the hell out of your mother and having to go to a therapist for your life? though it would be interesting.

No, it wouldn't be worth it. Although then maybe they'd understand....no, scratch that. They'd just send me back to the counselor who doesn't really help at all.

And now I feel like I've taken 1 step forward and 2 steps back. I gradually eased off the cutting, but then I started again about a week and a half ago because ... well, I guess it was because I was so mad at myself. Because I really do hate myself. It seems like everything I do, I make mistakes. So now, I cut less, but deeper. It's almost like I challenge myself to see how much blood I can draw to the surface of my skin. confused I just don't know what to do. Everywhere I look, I see all my flaws reflected back at me. If I criticize someone else (even if I don't say anything out loud) I feel guilty and hate myself even more.  

[HiddenWolfNinja]

pm me and talk to me, i can probably help you out, and at the same time, maybe you can help me with the same problem.