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 Posted: Fri Jun 05, 2009 11:29 am
Granted. The US Government mistakes it for a missile silo, though, so you find yourself trapped beneath boxes of warheads.
I wish today would stop sucking.
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Posted: Fri Jun 05, 2009 11:40 am
Granted. Every other day of your life is a horrible shitfest of bad luck and unbelievably horrific circumstances.
I wish my own computer was working.
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Posted: Fri Jun 05, 2009 1:50 pm
Granted but the FBI finds all your child porn the second you turn it on.
I wish I'd stop sneezing blood when I wake up.
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Posted: Fri Jun 05, 2009 9:49 pm
Granted. You will now sneeze Tabasco sauce when you wake up.
I wish I didn't have so much gas all the time.
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Posted: Sat Jun 06, 2009 12:35 am
Granted but now your car doesn't drive and you freeze in the winter and have no hot water.
I wish I didn't have the worst timing ever with everything I do.
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Posted: Mon Jan 25, 2010 8:06 pm
granted but you're allergic to ABSOLUTELY everything else, and die shortly after the wish is granted (that darn oxygen just annihilated your lungs)
I wish I was an amazonian queeeeeen
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Posted: Mon Jan 25, 2010 8:11 pm
Granted, but now your tits are gone because when they were first growing you burned them off to make sure you could draw your bowstring.
I wish the military wasn't my last resort.
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Posted: Tue Jan 26, 2010 3:01 pm
Granted. You now have a prospective job as a male stripper.
I wish I could find a job.
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Posted: Tue Jan 26, 2010 10:26 pm
Kyoki Kitsune Granted. You now have a prospective job as a male stripper. I wish I could find a job. (HELL YEAH) Granted, you know suck the farts out of bus seats. I wish my head didn't hurt =[
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Posted: Wed Jan 27, 2010 7:53 am
(Fantastic)
Granted, deathblow to the head.
I wish I had my own place.
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Posted: Wed Jan 27, 2010 10:35 am
You have your own place but then dinosaurs wipe it out.
I wish that I had an unlimited number of wishes, and that nothing could ever possibly go wrong with any of them.
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Posted: Wed Jan 27, 2010 10:54 am
marzipancakes You have your own place but then dinosaurs wipe it out. I wish that I had an unlimited number of wishes, and that nothing could ever possibly go wrong with any of them. Granted, but at the expense of having perfect wishes, somebody in the world randomly dies everytime you make one. I wish I had a nine inch long p***s.
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Posted: Wed Jan 27, 2010 12:26 pm
Granted, but only when flaccid. It shrinks to three when erect.
I wish I hadn't dislocated my knee.
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Posted: Wed Jan 27, 2010 1:53 pm
Granted, you severed your leg from the knee down.
I wish I had less reading to do.
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Posted: Mon Feb 08, 2010 5:03 pm
Granted, we removed a period.
I wish I had a tux.
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