Magical Soda Machine

[Ghost of Lily]

Gets a Divorce

Inserts Ex-spouse  

[Faerie KatrinaZ]

Gets: custodial rights to the kids.

Inserts: Paid off mortgage (Woo Hoo!)  

[Icy Reign]

gets restraining order

inserts a cadillac with four flats  

[Nei1]

Gets to call AAA.
Inserts a tow truck.  

[Gilda Geezer]

Gets an unexpected view of butt-cleavage gonk

Inserts eye patch  

[ThisEmptySoul]

Gets: an uncanny urge to talk like a pirate pirate

Inserts: peg leg  

[Icy Reign]

gets...Aunt Peggy?! eek

*inserts cheek pinchers and wet kisses*  

[ThisEmptySoul]

gonk
Gets: an irritated gag reflex

Inserts: soap  

[bandaidd]

gets squeaky clean dishes

inserts dishwasher  

[ThisEmptySoul]

Gets: a wife! ninja

Inserts: rolling pin  

[Eileen50]

Gets: a cast iron frying pan.

*Inserts baseball bat*  

[Icy Reign]

gets a talking dog in a banana suit with maracas singing "peanut Butter Jelly Time"

*inserts a guy that has a chin that looks like a pair of balls*  

[Nei1]

Gets a skin disorder.
Inserts a rubber glove.  

[Icy Reign]

gets a...PROSTATE EXAM?!?! scream I'm female you moron!!! stressed

*inserts malpractice claim*  

[KommandoKat]

Gets an OBGYN
Inserts Test results eek