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Posted: Mon Aug 16, 2010 3:46 pm
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Posted: Tue Aug 17, 2010 12:42 am
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Through my time surfing the interwebs, I learnt who to trust.
Unlike most of you, I have a crush on a stranger. But I know in my heart that she is who she is. I found her through her drawings and animations, and then we started talking. I grew fond of her and I tried to talk to her every day. Eventually, she gave in and showed a picture of herself to me. Man, did she look good. And by good, I mean goooOOOOoood. She told me to not save the picture, because she wanted to delete it afterwards. I know it's her, and not some random picture, partially because she looked like her persona, and mostly because my heart would not lie to me. Of course, I do have fantasies about her, more than you think. But if she were to come here and read this... >////< Eventually, after I came out to my family as a lesbian, I gave up and told her I loved her. She reacted well though. She was kinda annoyed about how she kept on attracting girls, because she was straight. We're still good friends, and I think I can be more open with her now-a-days.
She says I've done a lot for her, but I feel like I haven't done nearly enough. Whenever I'm around her, I have no desire for her to leave, even though I let her leave. If I haven't talked to her in a day, I go crazy. OK, I overexaggerated, but I still feel like I've become a better person for just talking to her.
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Posted: Tue Aug 17, 2010 8:20 am
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Posted: Tue Aug 17, 2010 8:20 am
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Posted: Thu Aug 19, 2010 6:19 pm
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Posted: Sun Aug 22, 2010 3:50 pm
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Posted: Thu Aug 26, 2010 4:16 pm
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Posted: Fri Aug 27, 2010 2:16 pm
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Posted: Fri Aug 27, 2010 3:40 pm
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Posted: Tue Aug 31, 2010 7:16 pm
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I've actually had several straight crushes: I seem to have the worst luck with women....x.x My first was when I was ten years old, although I didn't realize my feelings until recently. I met a girl named Emily in Girl Guides. She was nine, but as it was my first year in the program, I mainly made friends with the girls a year younger, who had just come from Brownies. She had recently gotten a buzz cut, and it looked very cute on her. She was always very exciteable, and made everything seem brighter and more real. We spent a year as best friends, during which I was completely infatuated with her, looking up to her, and doing whatever she wanted. That's the problem with liking someone when you don't even realize your feelings: you become their slave. My second straight crush was named Adria (and as she has Gaia, all I can do is sincerely pray that she never reads this). She was very unique in her personality and attire. She dressed like a boy, and played sports. She was the only girl in my entire class who wasn't stereotypically bland, and unbearably sweet. She has greenish brown eyes, and sandy brown hair tied in a pony-tail at the nape of her neck. My feelings for her developed in grade eight, just as I was beginning to come out to myself. My final, and most prominent crush is on my best friend Charlotte. She's absolutely beautiful, with brown curly hair that she recently cut in a bob, green-gold eyes, a shy smile, and an absolutely brilliant mind. She's an incredible writer and musician, and we share all of the same interests. Of course, as she's straight, I have simply chosen not to share my feelings with her: I don't want to make our friendship awkward, especially since there is no chance of us ever having a relationship. She has a wonderful boyfriend, and I'm very happy for her. She really deserves it, considering the amount of cruelty she experiences from her unintelligent peers. So that's my sob story: basically, every girl I've ever really loved has been straight, and the only girls that have ever shown interest in me turn out to be "just experimenting". I seem to have really terrible luck with women.
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Posted: Wed Sep 01, 2010 4:10 pm
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Posted: Wed Sep 01, 2010 4:26 pm
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Posted: Thu Sep 02, 2010 4:10 am
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Posted: Thu Sep 02, 2010 4:22 am
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Mmmmm, you will love this.
This Girl on my basketball team the straightest girl ever, I have a crush on, she had no idea that i liked girls. I would show off make baskets with my eyes closed or looking at her. I was with my first girlfriend at the time long distance but she was visiting. we had talked and texted a lot. I had a feeling she liked me, so i told her i had a girlfriend. We didnt talk much after that it was completly awkward. FML right, gets worse. She told me that she liked me and really wanted to date, she didnt understand what was going on or why she felt this way. I broke up with my gf at the time, to date her. We dated for almost a year, she left me for a guy, we got back together dated for almost two years, she left me for a man again.... talk about heart broken, its been 11months later and i still cant get over it.
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Posted: Thu Sep 02, 2010 6:02 am
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there'd be a huge freakin list if i said every straight girl i LUSTED after... but there are only two straight girls i've ever had a crush on, or SOMEWHAT deeper feelings for.
obviously, the first was the girl who made me doubt my orientation. i was like in... 7th grade... and waaay more shy and submissive and whatnot. she stood up for me. we clung to each other 'cause we were both shy, and neither of us had friends. i totally lov'd her. n____n she was really nice and blahblahblah all that good shiz. she also made me feel safe and protected.
8th grade had a bageebus load of drama 'cause she basically got a group of friends. it's sort of like.... person with common sense VS a group of... well... people that didn't in a lot of areas @__@ she applied to that, or maybe she grew into that.... i'm not sure which. she became incredibly self absorbed and i still had really low self esteem so it was sort of an abusive relationship, and by relationship i mean just a general kind; when i told her i was bisexual, she was all "PSH I KNEW THAT i had a guess anyway", and then when i told her i liked her she was just all o_o and never said anything about it. she wouldn't even tell me that she didn't know what to say or anything. whenever i tried to get her opinion on anything serious, not even related to that, she was always just "i don't know" or didn't reply. IT WAS A COMPLICATED FORM OF "I DON'T KNOW" OK idk how to explain it. her parents were/are kinda psycho.
lalalalaaaa the drama lasted through 8th grade and freshman year i tried to be indifferent. i knew i was gay by then, although now i identify as pansexual(but zomg most of them are girls). this didn't work well, and basically i was faking it the entire year, and i think only this past summer i reflected and truly got over it. now she's just really amusing because of how insecure she is n___n it's funny to watch her walk around and her reactions when i don't pay attention to her.
the other i met on the internet. she's hawt as sin. or rather, adorable as sin <3333 BUT HAWT TOO. we became best friends and she's adorable and nice and optimistic n___n i knew i wasss gay i think by the time i met her. lalala there honestly wasn't much drama. i told her i liked her uhhh twice because the feelings came up ALL THE TIME aaand the 2nd time she was all "BUT WHAT IF I LIKE YOU TOO?!?!?!" and some stuff happened and now we're in a long distance open relationship and she's still hawt/adorable as sin. she says she isn't gay or even bisexual, but rather just annasexual or straight except for anna. n______________n that doesn't entirely explain why she's ok with a sort of love triangle with me and my other female best friend, though....
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