Was anyone else here in denial?

[Lady Kayura]

Shanna66

Lady Kayura

CuriousColt

but I agree it seems a stranger would be easier to tell

I've always found strangers easier to tell. Online friends are easier to tell compared to those I speak to in person. Or at least, that's how it was for me.

same. im so much more open with my online friends about my emotions and everything than i am with most people i know in real life

Online friends responded better than RL friends. Told the former I'm not straight and they're like "oh, okay. cool."

Told my bestie and she said "No you're not."

xD Whatever though.  

[Shanna66]

Lady Kayura

Shanna66

Lady Kayura

CuriousColt

but I agree it seems a stranger would be easier to tell

I've always found strangers easier to tell. Online friends are easier to tell compared to those I speak to in person. Or at least, that's how it was for me.

same. im so much more open with my online friends about my emotions and everything than i am with most people i know in real life

Online friends responded better than RL friends. Told the former I'm not straight and they're like "oh, okay. cool."

Told my bestie and she said "No you're not."

xD Whatever though.

the family that i told and my best friend were very accepting, and i knew deep down they would be, but that one incident where that one friend became my ex friend over the issue constantly was in the back of my mind. my best friend was actually pretty hurt that i had kept it from her for nearly 10 years. in my defense though i thought she would have gotten the hint when i kissed her. that woman can be as dense as i am xd  

[CuriousColt]

Just dont let me catch you while I am on my segway.

Onato

CuriousColt

Onato

CuriousColt

Well hun, I'm very similar to you :3 I questioned if I was gay when I was 16. My family basically flipped s**t and began to get "heart problems" and ect. Well, for their sake, I went back to being straight. I put it off until after I got back from basic training with the Army at Fort Benning, GA. I was 19 when I got back and I started thinking about it again. I then fell into depression for some reason not fully knowing. I discovered it was because I was drowning my real self for the sake of everyone else. I then came back out to my parents who openly accepted me after they discovered what I was going through. Hun, it's not good to drown any part of yourself. You can't help who you are. And trust me, there are TONS of gay guys in the Army, and lesbians as well. I'm a gay infantryman who serves his country. I'm only 20. Don't deny who you are :3

This was a huge help! After you finally came to accept it how did you start meeting guys? I had a friend who went to benning last summer and I dont ship till june sad but I will be going to Fort Leonard wood misery as they call it biggrin For basic and AIT for MP

Ah, Mp. I hate MPs ;p hehe no offense. But I started meeting guys just by hanging out with people and being straight up with myself. Any friends I had, I told them I was gay. They all accepted me :3 but you'll find them, trust me.

 

[bollier]

I was definitely in denial, and I didn't snap out of it until I was 22. I even had a girlfriend in High School for 8 months. I just said it one day to myself, and everything just seemed to click into place. I've pretty much told just my mom (no close friends to tell xp ). The situation with my father and sister is very difficult, but I will tell them as soon as I can. I also plan on going back to school soon for a Master's Degree, and I plan on being fully open and honest. Enough about me, I just want to finish by saying congratulations on accepting who you are, and as time passes accepting yourself becomes much easier.  

[MachineMuse]

for ages yup  

[Raeiko]

well your friends are not good friends if they are not going to accept you with your family thats diff almost everyone I know, knows except for my family  

[loonaboots]

well, i was. kind of. .-.

lemme explain: i thought i was asexual, and then i thought i wasn't for at least five years max- i thought i was straight, then bisexual, then pansexual, then gay. and then back to asexual. then it was gray-asexual, demisexual, straight, pansexual, bisexual, gay.

AND THEN WE GOT BACK TO ASEXUAL.

and all that switching back and forth happened in a year and half (yes, that does say a year and a half).

although when i was younger, i always went with straight until the end of fifth grade, which was when i started questioning. i started out with bisexual, then to straight, and then we get to the first asexual.

so! this is how it went down:

show spoilerhide spoiler

from little kid to fifth grade:
heterosexual

after fifth grade:
bisexual
heterosexual
asexual
heterosexual
bisexual
pansexual
homosexual
asexual
gray-asexual
demisexual
heterosexual
pansexual
bisexual
homosexual
asexual (this is the one i am at now)


oh, and then i realized romantic orientations.
...i'll just let you imagine how that went down, okay? (hint: i was switching around for four months.)

but i identify as asexual-panromantic now.
and was in denial about that for at least two months, along with being in constant limbo about "yes, i am --sexual" and "yes i am straight."

also, i typed "--sexual" so many times they don't look like words now.

 

[Shameless Smile]

I don't think I was ever in denial, but my family definitely was, and some still are.  

[Necromimi]

I wouldn't say that I was ever in denial but I had 'phases' I had the, I'm bisexual phase. Which pretty much failed because I was never remotely close to being attracted to guys. But I forced myself to do it in hopes that I would be 'normal' then I had the asexual phase, which lasted about......a day.

I had my 'I'm strictly straight' phase. That didn't go too well.

When I hit 18, all the phases went bye bye and I soon discovered who I really was. When I knew for sure, I told my cousin and my best friend who were both fine with it. Almost everyone in my family knows except a few people. Those few people being my mother, my aunts, and my uncles.

I don't make much a big deal out of my sexuality so I guess that's why I never told them sweatdrop

Who am I kidding? I can bet ya they already know without me having to tell them. It's pretty obvious. 3nodding

 

[Condom Maneuver]

❖「時間は誰を待つ...

◐ I was in denial ever since I was young... Around age of 12 was when I really denied myself that I liked men. But from support I gained from friends and LGBT community recently, I am more or so say that I like men. But I still classify myself as bisexual than homosexual because I think I haven't fully accepted my true sexual orientation. ◑

그래서 시간은 소중합니다.」❖

 

[Symptom_of_Society]

Yup, sounds familiar XD I know how you feel...

Dancehall Hysteria

well, i was. kind of. .-.

lemme explain: i thought i was asexual, and then i thought i wasn't for at least five years max- i thought i was straight, then bisexual, then pansexual, then gay. and then back to asexual. then it was gray-asexual, demisexual, straight, pansexual, bisexual, gay.

AND THEN WE GOT BACK TO ASEXUAL.

and all that switching back and forth happened in a year and half (yes, that does say a year and a half).

although when i was younger, i always went with straight until the end of fifth grade, which was when i started questioning. i started out with bisexual, then to straight, and then we get to the first asexual.

so! this is how it went down:

show spoilerhide spoiler

from little kid to fifth grade:
heterosexual

after fifth grade:
bisexual
heterosexual
asexual
heterosexual
bisexual
pansexual
homosexual
asexual
gray-asexual
demisexual
heterosexual
pansexual
bisexual
homosexual
asexual (this is the one i am at now)


oh, and then i realized romantic orientations.
...i'll just let you imagine how that went down, okay? (hint: i was switching around for four months.)

but i identify as asexual-panromantic now.
and was in denial about that for at least two months, along with being in constant limbo about "yes, i am --sexual" and "yes i am straight."

also, i typed "--sexual" so many times they don't look like words now.

 

[VoidCrow]

Yes I was, most definitely. All my life I've known, in the back of my mind, that I liked guys, and also girls. But I would always push the liking guys part out of my mind, every time it arose. I basically told myself over and over "no guys are icky", but now I have a boyfriend, so I guess they aren't all icky. ;3

But also I've been telling myself over and over again that I feel alright in my body. But I've never felt alright with being male. I remember a few times just staring at myself in the mirror, feeling like a stranger. Or feeling as though I'm not "correct". That I just don't fit within this shell. I'm also 6' 4", and have a pretty manly voice. My inner voice has always sounded quiet, and feminine, but my outer never reflected that. My inner being just has never matched my outer form. I've just recently began to feel like I should think about doing something, but I'm terrified that it might not be a good idea.

And to all those who were talking about how it's easier to come out to strangers, there is a reason for that. Strangers don't have connections to you. People online don't really know you. Telling them has less of a bad side. If you lose a stranger, OH NO, there's still a bunch of strangers. But the fear of losing a friend is horrifying, thus making it more difficult to come out to them. Science!  

[Luna Breeeze]

I am 21 yrs old and have recently started to come out. I have known that I like girls for a very long time I just ignored it. but As I found my self less and less distracted to guys as I tried dating them I realized I'm just not attracted to them. I've been in the closet for a while but the door will be all open soon enough  

[Rezal_Zioun]

i was 100% in denial. I liked to roll play as girls on games like runescape and get online boyfriends. And flirt and o god i was a such little homo X) Not sure how i turn out bisexual. I would think to my self a girl and a guy is straight. So as long as i am fantasizing that i am a girl having sex with a guy and not another guy having sex with a guy its not gay and i am not a f*****t.

I would say mean things about gays and my mom and dad would get mad at me for it.(they are not pro-gay, but anti hating on people for just using there freedoms.)

It hit me like a brick when I was 14. I was watching porn and it never really did much for me. Then I somehow ended up on gay porn, and that to my 14 year self was just the best hottest thing i had ever seen. I watch a few more gay porn videos. wiped the computers web history. sat there for a bit then thought about all the gay stuff i had done online. I remember thinking It all makes since now I was gay the whole time. It was like I just found out the plot twist in a 2 year long movie.  

[Seer of Heart]

I had myself convinced I was asexual for a time, simply because I wished to repress any and all feelings that could be potentially messy and.. well, human. So, to your question, yes. I was in doubt, as well.

I was mostly confused because of the way homosexuality was portrayed in the media; the general stereotype which I did not really fit. I would say I act more like the stereotype of a lesbian at times than a gay man when it comes down to it, though mostly from being raised by "macho" guys.

Digression aside, the point is that it is hard at first to try getting a hold on who you are; the likes, dislikes, and what is beneath all the superficial whims of our senses--that which we think and feel.
You wouldn't be letting down anybody but yourself if you compromise your own feelings and thoughts for those of another.

I do wish you the best of luck in this. c: