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Posted: Thu Jan 10, 2013 8:50 pm
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Posted: Thu Jan 10, 2013 11:45 pm
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Posted: Fri Jan 11, 2013 7:02 pm
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Posted: Fri Jan 11, 2013 8:19 pm
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Posted: Sat Jan 12, 2013 9:31 pm
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Posted: Sun Jan 13, 2013 11:58 am
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Posted: Mon Jan 14, 2013 3:44 am
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Posted: Mon Jan 14, 2013 1:24 pm
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Posted: Mon Jan 14, 2013 2:29 pm
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Posted: Sun Jan 20, 2013 6:08 pm
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Posted: Tue Jan 22, 2013 3:31 pm
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Posted: Tue Jan 22, 2013 5:36 pm
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Posted: Wed Jan 23, 2013 7:15 am
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I was about 12 when I had my first sexual fantasy involving another male. At that time I didn't even understand sexuality, but as I learned about it through media and friends, I did get the impression that being homosexual meant being confused about your own sexual identity and that it was overall a bad thing.
It didn't help that my family used to laugh about homosexuality, calling gay men sissies and such. This and the observation that my mother stumbled from one broken relationship into another, made me believe that relationships, sexuality and sexual identity are just one messed-up heap and that those things will only lead to unhappiness. From then on I desired to be asexual. It didn't work out though. xd
I still felt the need for sexual stimulation, but thinking about other men made me feel uncomfortable, even though I wanted to. So I tricked myself, I fantasized about sexual scenarios where another male transformed into a female, which made me believe it was suddenly okay to have sex with him/her.
When that wasn't enough I imagined myself as a female, though I shied away from imagining having sex with another guy. The thought of having sex with a man being okay in that fictional situation sufficed.
As more and more of my friends started having girlfriends, I suddenly felt under pressure. I felt like I had to get a girlfriend to be socially accepted. I'm not very handsome and had very low self-esteem at that time, so that didn't work out either. smile
By the time I was 17 and lived alone for about half a year, I already repressed the memories of my early sexual desires. I thought I was completely straight until I became interested in the concept of hermaphroditism. I began to enjoy futanari art, the thought of a women also having a p***s was very arousing to me. After a few months I didn't even mind if they had no vaginas, I even dared to look at gay art whenever the pictured guys looked girly enough.
I think I was about 19 when I first actively looked up gay pornographic pictures on the internet and realized that I am definitely not straight.
Now I'm 22. Last month I told my girlfriend of 4 years that I am bisexual. I don't know if this is entirely true though. I feel sexually attracted to her (or at least I believe that), but I can't stop imagining what it is like to have an intimate relationship with another man.
In short I am about to realize if I am entirely homosexual or not. sweatdrop
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Posted: Wed Jan 23, 2013 5:57 pm
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Posted: Thu Jan 24, 2013 1:04 pm
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