Heterophobia within the LGBT community ?

[Shanna66]

Symptom_of_Society

And this. Sigh.....Ive heard this a number of times and to me it has a hateful ring.

Breeder: slang term used by people of homosexual persuasion to refer to heterosexual couples, who have a significantly higher risk of contributing to the population increase than the homosexuals do. (urban dictionary).

god i have nothing but hate for that term  

[Taeryyn]

For what it's worth, I've also heard "breeder" used by childless straight people to express derision for people that they feel are bad parents. razz Or just for parents in general, depending on their outlook on children. The kids usually get called crotch-spawn, or some such.
Either way, it's not a nice thing to say.  

[loonaboots]

yeah, i can definitely bite the bullet on this one.

obviously, it's not as spread as homophobia (thankfully, as we don't need more hate), but it's there, because lots of people like to fight hate with hate.

i read a post wrong on tumblr, and sent the creator of the post an ask saying basically that in canon, that character wasn't trans, as a heads up. i then sent a follow up apology after i realized i read the post wrong and that they meant a headcanon. i later got an anonymous ask accusing me of being transphobic, and a "disgusting cishet white girl" who didn't know s**t and was oppressing trans people... by making a simple mistake. like, okay dude.

and it's getting a lot worse, it's really disgusting; fighting hate with hate is never a good course of action, and fighting people who could have been potential supporters of your cause because they aren't like you is never a good course of action.

i've seen stories about open minded people becoming horrifically racist, homophobic, and the like because of behavior like this, and it's sad; it disgusts me. and i've been called weak before because i don't think that acting like this is a good way to make change; racist, too.

and i'm terrified of speaking out, because of all the hate that people who do tend to get; sometimes people will even end up getting doxxed- their phone numbers, social security numbers, and so on are leaked online.
x

 

[Matasoga]

Symptom_of_Society

And this. Sigh.....Ive heard this a number of times and to me it has a hateful ring.

Breeder: slang term used by people of homosexual persuasion to refer to heterosexual couples, who have a significantly higher risk of contributing to the population increase than the homosexuals do. (urban dictionary).

This might be a term that can certainly be used hatefully, but I can't help but think of this song and NPH.... If I were to try to imagine a human embodiment of friendliness, I think it would look an awful lot like him.
By association, it's a term that I can only view with quite a bit of levity, if not, per se, affection.  

[Belethiel]

I don't think we should call it heterophobia. That would add legitimacy to it and bigots will be more likely to use that word and act persecuted when people call them out on thier s**t.

What it is... it's backlash. Well-deserved backlash. I don't think it's outright hateful.

But it's counter-productive and we shouldn't participate in this behavior.

However, biphobia, acephobia and transphobia is very real within this community.  

[Midnas Lament]

Personally, most of this is the reason I quit going on Tumblr. While it's great and stuff, the crazy SJW'S have really overrun it, and it's no longer an enjoyable experience when I'm scared of a couple messages in my inbox after I had posted a personal opinion. Anyways, I'm bi; and have been told by some LGBT community members that I was just being "greedy" and I just need to "pick a side," my mom even said that to me.

However, I feel that there's so much unbridled hate in the community, and it makes me extremely sad sometimes. Why fight hate with hate when we could just love? Like I honestly do not understand that mindset.  

[Symptom_of_Society]

While I agree that it would be unwise to propagate the term heterophobia, I don't think that this negates its legitimacy. While it might be "well-deserved' its still , i think, hateful to say the least.

Belethiel

I don't think we should call it heterophobia. That would add legitimacy to it and bigots will be more likely to use that word and act persecuted when people call them out on thier s**t.

What it is... it's backlash. Well-deserved backlash. I don't think it's outright hateful.

But it's counter-productive and we shouldn't participate in this behavior.

However, biphobia, acephobia and transphobia is very real within this community.

 

[Karmerruk]

I think this is something probably arising with the new generation of gays hitting the scene as this is absolutely news to me. While I have noticed the occasional "We hate breeders!" attitude amongst some in the community, I had no idea it was actually an issue people were taking seriously. Still, I feel about these people the same way I feel about anybody propagating hate: They're fucking idiots. I don't care why they do it, but it's downright toxic and counterintuitive. They are allowing themselves to be no better than hate groups like the WBC and KKK. I refuse to give them the attention they so desperately seek.  

[Margay777]

I'm bi and I dated a guy once (at sleep away camp), then someone on the internet I was talking to said I was just trying to get attention because I wasn't really bi or I would have dated a girl.... I don't think they understand what the term bisexual means....  

[Atrum_Anima]

"Heterophobia", "Cisphobia", etc. don't exist in systematic terms. There are people who hate straight people, but that doesn't mean that straight people are oppressed by the queer community. Straight people and cis people have systematic privilege that prevents them from being oppressed on those particular axes of identity.  

[Dark_Contortion]

I didn't know such a thing existed.
I personally don't have any experience in heterophobia but I must say that the idea sounds ridiculous. The LGBT community is supposed to express love and show people that we aren't harmful, retaliating with a similar hate/phobia is only going to make things worse.  

[ectoparasite]

heterophobia? cisphobia? misandry? racism towards white people?
please tell me you're joking. using those words as if they're comparable to homophobia, transphobia, and ACTUAL racism is a ******** joke

heterophobia is not real. cisphobia is not real. misandry is not real. reverse racism is DEFINITELY not real.

(i only mention reverse racism & misandry because someone else here did; i realize the discussion is mostly wrt "heterophobia"/"cisphobia")

is there discrimination? sure, we can use that word. for me it has stronger connotations than the situation deserves, but it works. but it's completely justified. it's not "fighting hate with hate." i have literally NEVER seen anyone (on tumblr at least) get s**t just for being cis/straight/white; i've only heard cis/straight/white people talk about it. there are jokes, sure, but it's not on the same level.

in regards to "misandry" at least, it's necessary. enough men are dangerous that women need to be on the defensive.

also the lgbt community being a loving, safe space?? that's also untrue. there is so much discrimination just within this community that i honestly can't say i really associate with it. just as other people have said, there's discrimination against bi/pan people. (which, btw, is NOT heterophobia; saying it's heterophobia means disregarding their sexualities)

and then, yknow, transphobia, and then among trans people there's transmisogyny, etc. etc.

i can't articulate this very well myself. words were never my strong suit...

also:

Midnas Lament

the crazy SJW'S

please don't say this. it's ableist.

EDIT: i guess i should clarify; "cr*zy" is an ableist term (though i don't think it's quite on the same level as slurs? hell if i know)  

[Shanna66]

fernsehen

heterophobia? cisphobia? misandry? racism towards white people?
please tell me you're joking. using those words as if they're comparable to homophobia, transphobia, and ACTUAL racism is a ******** joke

heterophobia is not real. cisphobia is not real. misandry is not real. reverse racism is DEFINITELY not real.

(i only mention reverse racism & misandry because someone else here did; i realize the discussion is mostly wrt "heterophobia"/"cisphobia")

is there discrimination? sure, we can use that word. for me it has stronger connotations than the situation deserves, but it works. but it's completely justified. it's not "fighting hate with hate." i have literally NEVER seen anyone (on tumblr at least) get s**t just for being cis/straight/white; i've only heard cis/straight/white people talk about it. there are jokes, sure, but it's not on the same level.

in regards to "misandry" at least, it's necessary. enough men are dangerous that women need to be on the defensive.

also the lgbt community being a loving, safe space?? that's also untrue. there is so much discrimination just within this community that i honestly can't say i really associate with it. just as other people have said, there's discrimination against bi/pan people. (which, btw, is NOT heterophobia; saying it's heterophobia means disregarding their sexualities)

and then, yknow, transphobia, and then among trans people there's transmisogyny, etc. etc.

i can't articulate this very well myself. words were never my strong suit...

also:

Midnas Lament

the crazy SJW'S

please don't say this. it's ableist.

EDIT: i guess i should clarify; "cr*zy" is an ableist term (though i don't think it's quite on the same level as slurs? hell if i know)

you must be lucky and havent seen a lot of the blogs ive ended up seeing on tumblr, that site is becoming a cesspool

also some of us who arent mentally sound enjoy using the word crazy and feel its perfeclty ok that others use the word aswell smile  

[ectoparasite]

Shanna66

you must be lucky and havent seen a lot of the blogs ive ended up seeing on tumblr, that site is becoming a cesspool

also some of us who arent mentally sound enjoy using the word crazy and feel its perfeclty ok that others use the word aswell smile

yeah, ok, there are probably some extremists on tumblr. it's a given. but i've been on many blogs run by lgbtia+ (or is it lgbtqia+ i cant remember?) people and poc and, while there are quite a few jokes - some a little harsher than others - there's been nothing that even comes close to the s**t we face.

((please note that while i mention poc, i'm white myself so i certainly can't speak for them; i don't believe i've overstepped any boundaries wrt that yet but please correct me if i'm wrong))

and no, i don't care that there are people in the community who disagree with me. i feel, as a member of that community, that we have the right to vent and make jokes and be a little harsh toward our oppressors online. it's the only place we can. as you've seen, i am most certainly not the only person who feels this way.

also, i'm not "mentally sound" (what the fresh hell does that even mean) and i'm not okay with it. a lot of mentally ill people aren't okay with it. i know people who are triggered by the word??? and using it as an insult or treating it as a negative thing isn't cool anyway????? :///

i probably won't continue w/this convo much further, to be honest? discussions in general are not my strong suit, and i really don't want to argue anyway. i've put in my two cents, and that's all i wanted.  

[Shanna66]

fernsehen

Shanna66

you must be lucky and havent seen a lot of the blogs ive ended up seeing on tumblr, that site is becoming a cesspool

also some of us who arent mentally sound enjoy using the word crazy and feel its perfeclty ok that others use the word aswell smile

yeah, ok, there are probably some extremists on tumblr. it's a given. but i've been on many blogs run by lgbtia+ (or is it lgbtqia+ i cant remember?) people and poc and, while there are quite a few jokes - some a little harsher than others - there's been nothing that even comes close to the s**t we face.

((please note that while i mention poc, i'm white myself so i certainly can't speak for them; i don't believe i've overstepped any boundaries wrt that yet but please correct me if i'm wrong))

and no, i don't care that there are people in the community who disagree with me. i feel, as a member of that community, that we have the right to vent and make jokes and be a little harsh toward our oppressors online. it's the only place we can. as you've seen, i am most certainly not the only person who feels this way.

also, i'm not "mentally sound" (what the fresh hell does that even mean) and i'm not okay with it. a lot of mentally ill people aren't okay with it. i know people who are triggered by the word??? and using it as an insult or treating it as a negative thing isn't cool anyway????? :///

i probably won't continue w/this convo much further, to be honest? discussions in general are not my strong suit, and i really don't want to argue anyway. i've put in my two cents, and that's all i wanted.

fair enough smile we can just disagree on some things. sorry if my post came off at bitchy or anything. lots of sad crap going on at work and sometimes it makes me a little pissy at people who dont quite deserve it

yeah i consider myself white too even though part of my family is from the middle east. dont know where and i dont know anything about that part of my family thanks to a racist grandmother but im really pale like my dad so i just call myself white.

and i totally understand ranting online. i do it too. crap allies being my main pet peeve. and i honestly have no idea what our acronym thing is anymore. i just say lgbt and people know what im talking about. sucks that im leaving some people out but i honestly cannot remember them all

also i hate the term mentally ill which is why i used not mentally sound. i think it sounds nicer. couple things wrong in my brain that i need some meds for but i hate the term illness with long term things that have kind of had a hand in making me who i am