[Open Class] - Something Trashy (Barth + Zar)

[Baneful]

"I wouldn't actually know, considering I lived in an office my entire life." Zar hissed again, furious, but not exactly at Barth. Mostly he looked like if the robot had been a fleshy organic creature, it would no longer have any intact eyes.

"I hope never to ride bumper carts."

HP 13

 

[Toshihiko Two]

"Not a lot of fair games in offices," Barth hedged, and then more to himself,

"Or much of anything for anybody who doesn't enjoy stamping forms. It is a dismal environment. ...Less chance of a robot attacking, I'll grant you. It doesn't mean anything by it."

Another lunge missed Zar completely, also having difficulty with the ooze.

HP: 13  

[Baneful]

The more things missed, the more Zar circled around making the situation worse.

"There is nothing wrong with stamping forms." he said, but his heart wasn't entirely in it. "And exactly, it's safe! This nonsense is not safe at all!"

But some part of him deep deep down was glad. Safe had almost killed him, danger was keeping him alive.

Heartened a little by this thought he managed to crash the robot effectively and even give it a swipe with his tail for good measure.

HP: 13
 

[Toshihiko Two]

Barth shuddered.

"Safe? There? I'd rather be run through with another peppermint sword."

HP: 9  

[Baneful]

"Of course you'd hate it." Zar snapped. "Well. I hated it too." He shimmied his hips with no luck. "But..." another strain of effort against the steel. "But at least it was a home."

HP: 13
 

[Toshihiko Two]

"I am trying to graduate. I'm not thrilled about the...campus situation either, exactly."

HP: 9  

[Baneful]

"The fact this is part of the route to graduation is completely BATTY." He was running out of fight, there was only so much fiestiness in him and at this point he was starting to feel indifferent to the mess, he was so slick with awful that it would probably just slip right off of him.

"Why does nothing in this school function?!" and in another spike of anger he swiped his claws hard at Barth's robot as it passed him.

HP: 11  

[Toshihiko Two]

"It's not due to a shortage of funding. Our gym teacher is the head of the Bogeyman, our principle is the Mayor- so where all the overages are going is, frankly, a complete- oof, mystery, I think- I think you may almost have it."

HP: 3  

[Baneful]

"Maybe it's just intended to build moral character." Zar sighed. "Maybe this is part of their go-getting-ready-for-the-world initiative." He made a face. "It's probably bad contractors. Like the gnomes. Whose idea was it to HIRE THE GNOMES?"

And imagining all the times he'd been heckled by gnomes, he took it out again on Barth's robot.

HP: 10
 

[Toshihiko Two]

Barth's trashbot, wounded, spun once and then rigidy opened its grasping hand. It limped its way to the chutes, and teetered, then fell, emptying itself. Whether this was intentional or not was hard to say.

Barth fell to the ground in a loose, undignified pile of clothing, pride injured otherwise no worse for the wear.

He wobbled to his feet, trying to clear some of the garbage- a hopeless cause, from the front of his jacket. He eyed Zar.

"Now," he said, a little irritated, wiggling his claws, "let's get down to businessss, shall we?" Black thorns broiled at his feet. They curled, threatening, around nearby garbage bags, then rolled them up into spiky trash death balls.

They didn't hurtle towards Zar's robot, but still seemed to be doing a sufficiently annoying job.  

[Baneful]

Zar was extremely relieved that Barth was free and was able to just focus on keeping the robot away from the chutes it sorely wanted to move towards.

"No hurry, of course."

HP: 6
 

[Toshihiko Two]

The tumbleweeds made it difficult for the trashbot to navigate, anyway.

Barth was hoping it would drop Zar in favor of what was very obviously trash, but with all the...ooze....

Barth lost his train of thought, slightly. He adjusted his collar, voice cracking a bit.

"Z-Zar, err, when did you get...is that, is that you?"  

[Toshihiko Two]

The trashbags had all but halted.

It was not the best tactic.  

[Baneful]

Zar gave Barth an irritable look, his hair absolutely soaked with the slime. "Yes it's me!" he snapped, embarrassed and irritable in equal amounts. He felt like he'd wet himself in public like a scarling. "I thought it would HELP. BUT IT DIDN'T. It just made everything SLIPPERY. Of course except the things I actually wanted." He wriggled "To." and again. "BE."

 

[Toshihiko Two]

"The...slime," Barth clarified, even more strained, and now turning all shades of colors. "Oh. Oh yes, so it is, I'll-"

Think about something else.

"One. One moment."