Advice.

[Ice_queen_kat]

Ginhana

Well...right...mine's a little bit more serious and personal than these last few.

Last night, I had a really bad night at work. On my way home, I was incredibly tempted to release the wheel and let the car go where it felt like going. I know a lot of people will think I'm just suckering for attention, but I'm not. I really just don't want to be around anymore. I realized last night that I have been this way for a few years. I mean, at first I thought it was just a little spot of depression and I'd get over it, but now it's getting worse. I'm on antidepressants that I don't think are helping at -all-. I've been on them since November, so they've had plenty of time to kick in. I don't really know what to do...I've only told two of my friends and my parents don't know I've been having these thoughts. I don't want to get sent to a psychiatrist or put in a padded room because I'm crazy. I just sort of want to disappear.

You hear a lot of people say that commiting suicide is stupid...but they don't understand how it feels for those of us who have thought about it. It just makes us, or at least me, feel even lower to the ground than I already was.

I want to help you.. so please answer my question.. are you a christian? if not.. what is your religion?  

[Ginhana]

askeptykal

I was pretty depressed myself just a few months ago; now, suicide wasn't really an option for me, because I don't have the courage to do anything like that. Now, I'm not going to ask you to do anything other than consider what I say. What in your life could be so bad that you don't want to be around anymore? You shouldn't think totally of yourself; think of other people as well. Some people know that they are condemned to die soon; some haven't had a bite to eat in days; some are sitting out in the rain right now because thay can't afford anywhere to stay. I'm sure that there are many people out there who are worse off than you, and yet, they hang in there day after day. They have hope. They know that there is a chance that everything will change around some day. Maybe, instead of trying to find an immediate cure for your depression, you should hope for sunnier days.

That's what I was afraid of hearing. I know people have it worse with housing situations and food, but what good does that do me in feeling better? Just because my troubles are different, doesn't mean they aren't as bad. There are plenty of things that have happened that still haunt me. People who I know I can never trust again. It's hard to explain, but I know even though my situation is different, it isn't any less difficult to get through. Everyone learns to handle troubles to an extent, but once that extent has been reached, where do we have to go?

katrina07song

I want to help you.. so please answer my question.. are you a christian? if not.. what is your religion?

Sort of. I believe in God and Jesus. I don't really worship them, but I know why Jesus died. Yeah...  

[A Skepty]

Ginhana

askeptykal

I was pretty depressed myself just a few months ago; now, suicide wasn't really an option for me, because I don't have the courage to do anything like that. Now, I'm not going to ask you to do anything other than consider what I say. What in your life could be so bad that you don't want to be around anymore? You shouldn't think totally of yourself; think of other people as well. Some people know that they are condemned to die soon; some haven't had a bite to eat in days; some are sitting out in the rain right now because thay can't afford anywhere to stay. I'm sure that there are many people out there who are worse off than you, and yet, they hang in there day after day. They have hope. They know that there is a chance that everything will change around some day. Maybe, instead of trying to find an immediate cure for your depression, you should hope for sunnier days.

That's what I was afraid of hearing. I know people have it worse with housing situations and food, but what good does that do me in feeling better? Just because my troubles are different, doesn't mean they aren't as bad. There are plenty of things that have happened that still haunt me. People who I know I can never trust again. It's hard to explain, but I know even though my situation is different, it isn't any less difficult to get through. Everyone learns to handle troubles to an extent, but once that extent has been reached, where do we have to go?

Well, would it be possible to give a few more details?  

[[ Strawberry . Smile ]]

Ginhana

Well...right...mine's a little bit more serious and personal than these last few.

Last night, I had a really bad night at work. On my way home, I was incredibly tempted to release the wheel and let the car go where it felt like going. I know a lot of people will think I'm just suckering for attention, but I'm not. I really just don't want to be around anymore. I realized last night that I have been this way for a few years. I mean, at first I thought it was just a little spot of depression and I'd get over it, but now it's getting worse. I'm on antidepressants that I don't think are helping at -all-. I've been on them since November, so they've had plenty of time to kick in. I don't really know what to do...I've only told two of my friends and my parents don't know I've been having these thoughts. I don't want to get sent to a psychiatrist or put in a padded room because I'm crazy. I just sort of want to disappear.

You hear a lot of people say that commiting suicide is stupid...but they don't understand how it feels for those of us who have thought about it. It just makes us, or at least me, feel even lower to the ground than I already was.

Suicide is like comitting a crime. You are killing someone, namely, yourself. Don't do it. I know it's hard not to, sometimes I want to too, but I get over it. For you, I know it's a different situation, but suicide shouldn't have to be an option. Think about your family or friends or people who really care. There is at least one person out there, that would appreciate you for yourself. It may be something hard to believe, but it's true, not matter what. Even if not someone you know. Gaians care! I care, even if I never met you before, you are still someone. No one starts life having a friend. Your best friend used to be a stranger. OKay, back on topic, just don't suicide. Think about what I said, besides, If you are Christian or Catholic, or believe in God in any way, I want you to know that he is there for you. No one can see him, it's a fact, but there are people out there who believes in him. He works miracles for people, just pray. If you know how, start with the sign of the cross, then just talk to him like you would talk to a good friend, tell him your problems. Thank him for listening and thank him that you lived through today, and If you do that every night or day. Just trust me, I won't lie to you, I won't use God and lie. He will help you, I'm sure of it, maybe not in a visuable way but he will help you. Don't give up so soon, you don't know what God has in store for you. Sorry for making this so long, I'm human too and I just want to help, no other intention. It's your choice whether you believe me or not. I'm not the kind of person that would lie like this. God bless.  

[MasterCarse]

Well my girlfriend broke up with me about a month or two ago.When she broke up with me she said that "God told her to do it"(She is pretty deeply religious). At first I was depressed but then I didn't mind after a couple weeks. But recently, Just about every other week she comes up with some lie about me or something I hear about that makes me seem like an evil heartbreaking loser. A few weeks ago a good friend of my who is a friend of hers was at a birthday party with her and she was drawing moustaches and such on an old picture of me. Also he said she stabed it a few times hoping for a voodoo doll effect and killing me. And today I found that she has been telling people that I ruined her life. The thing is I cared a lot about her when we were together and never did anything to harm her that I could find. If anyone's life was effected, It was me who was crushed. All I need to know is what to do to handle this or get her to shut up and leave me alone. Any Ideas?  

[A Skepty]

MasterCarse

Well my girlfriend broke up with me about a month or two ago.When she broke up with me she said that "God told her to do it"(She is pretty deeply religious). At first I was depressed but then I didn't mind after a couple weeks. But recently, Just about every other week she comes up with some lie about me or something I hear about that makes me seem like an evil heartbreaking loser. A few weeks ago a good friend of my who is a friend of hers was at a birthday party with her and she was drawing moustaches and such on an old picture of me. Also he said she stabed it a few times hoping for a voodoo doll effect and killing me. And today I found that she has been telling people that I ruined her life. The thing is I cared a lot about her when we were together and never did anything to harm her that I could find. If anyone's life was effected, It was me who was crushed. All I need to know is what to do to handle this or get her to shut up and leave me alone. Any Ideas?

Well, it seems to me that if she's doing this, then God probably wasn't the reason that she broke up with you. Actually, now that I think of it, why would she do such things if she's that religious? In any case, my advice would be: ignore her. If you get angry, she'll see that it's working, and she'll push harder. Leave it alone, and she will most likely grow tired of what she's doing. Or some other guy will come along to attract her attention. Either's good for you.  

[MasterCarse]

Askeptykal

MasterCarse

Well my girlfriend broke up with me about a month or two ago.When she broke up with me she said that "God told her to do it"(She is pretty deeply religious). At first I was depressed but then I didn't mind after a couple weeks. But recently, Just about every other week she comes up with some lie about me or something I hear about that makes me seem like an evil heartbreaking loser. A few weeks ago a good friend of my who is a friend of hers was at a birthday party with her and she was drawing moustaches and such on an old picture of me. Also he said she stabed it a few times hoping for a voodoo doll effect and killing me. And today I found that she has been telling people that I ruined her life. The thing is I cared a lot about her when we were together and never did anything to harm her that I could find. If anyone's life was effected, It was me who was crushed. All I need to know is what to do to handle this or get her to shut up and leave me alone. Any Ideas?

Well, it seems to me that if she's doing this, then God probably wasn't the reason that she broke up with you. Actually, now that I think of it, why would she do such things if she's that religious? In any case, my advice would be: ignore her. If you get angry, she'll see that it's working, and she'll push harder. Leave it alone, and she will most likely grow tired of what she's doing. Or some other guy will come along to attract her attention. Either's good for you.

Well I wrote a note asking her why she did that and tried to extend a hand of friendship but she denied everything. I'll do the ignoring thing. It will be really easy to ignore her in Florida since I'm going with my showchoir group there so that will take my mind off of it. surprised  

[A Skepty]

MasterCarse

Askeptykal

MasterCarse

Well my girlfriend broke up with me about a month or two ago.When she broke up with me she said that "God told her to do it"(She is pretty deeply religious). At first I was depressed but then I didn't mind after a couple weeks. But recently, Just about every other week she comes up with some lie about me or something I hear about that makes me seem like an evil heartbreaking loser. A few weeks ago a good friend of my who is a friend of hers was at a birthday party with her and she was drawing moustaches and such on an old picture of me. Also he said she stabed it a few times hoping for a voodoo doll effect and killing me. And today I found that she has been telling people that I ruined her life. The thing is I cared a lot about her when we were together and never did anything to harm her that I could find. If anyone's life was effected, It was me who was crushed. All I need to know is what to do to handle this or get her to shut up and leave me alone. Any Ideas?

Well, it seems to me that if she's doing this, then God probably wasn't the reason that she broke up with you. Actually, now that I think of it, why would she do such things if she's that religious? In any case, my advice would be: ignore her. If you get angry, she'll see that it's working, and she'll push harder. Leave it alone, and she will most likely grow tired of what she's doing. Or some other guy will come along to attract her attention. Either's good for you.

Well I wrote a note asking her why she did that and tried to extend a hand of friendship but she denied everything. I'll do the ignoring thing. It will be really easy to ignore her in Florida since I'm going with my showchoir group there so that will take my mind off of it. surprised

Yes, it will. Have a good trip.  

[Mystic Flame]

(no names are being revealed, so as not to embarase the innocent) OK...relationship problem, I was at a gathering, get-together thing that a bunch of people who knew each other were going(there a group of people that know each other, so they usualy all get together some where), the only other people my age were girls, I had met them both before at other gatherings, and we were in the countrey, so we went on a hike, and talked and stuff. later, right after one of the girls left, the other told me that the person who had just left had a crush on me! And, stupid as I am, I didn't realize the 2nd person was leaving, so I didn't get the 1st girl's phone number! I will probably see her in a few months of so at another gathering, but what should I do in the mean time?  

[A Skepty]

I'm not sure there's much you can do in that time. 'Course, I'm a big timewaster, so maybe I'm not qualified to answer this. Still, think of some sweet things to say and case you need them, and maybe work up the courage to ask her out. And maybe next time, bring a little notebook and a pen for writing down phone numbers wink  

[Mystic Flame]

ok, I still cant belive how stupid I was... neutral  

[A Skepty]

Eh, you learn from your mistakes.  

[riu_xa]

Um...I don't know what to do. I went out with one of my best friends becasue I really like him and he liked me too but it didn't last much more than a week. When it was only me and him talking, he would be really nice and sweet but when we actually were together in person and with friends, it was at some church event and he acted completely different. He decided that we should just be friends since we cant really spend time together. He broke up with me recently and it hurt really badly becasue I really loved him. Since I go to his church I might see him sometimes and I don't know what I'm supposed to do.  

[Kirogata]

riu_xa

Um...I don't know what to do. I went out with one of my best friends becasue I really like him and he liked me too but it didn't last much more than a week. When it was only me and him talking, he would be really nice and sweet but when we actually were together in person and with friends, it was at some church event and he acted completely different. He decided that we should just be friends since we cant really spend time together. He broke up with me recently and it hurt really badly becasue I really loved him. Since I go to his church I might see him sometimes and I don't know what I'm supposed to do.

In all honesty, the suitation he was in might have been akward, his first realationship(I wouldn't know), or mabey he was influenced by his "friends". The best thing you should do is talk to him about it, face to face.

Show him that you care about him as a person, before carring about him as a lover. In the worst case scenario he just might not be willing to, or able to date at the moment, and if that is the case, tell him that you are willing to wait untill he is ready.  

[~[Arima]~]

Well this is going to be a little long, but I can't tell you how much I feel like I need to say this...

I can't Believe I still Love him

My boyfriend of at least four months and I broke up at the beginning of the school year this year. September 11th, 2005 to be exact...
And by now you'd think I wouldn't care about him anymore. But no matter how hard I try to think about other guys, my mind always falls on his image again... And the thing that makes me feel pathetic about it all, is the fact that we both totally loved each other... But no matter how he tried, my ex couldn't come up with any words to say to me....


I remember one time I saw him sitting in the room that's designated as the "Detention Room" after school ends. And I called my parents up to ask them if I could stay after school. I told them to pick me up at 5:30, two hours after school is normally over. I used the excuse that I was staying after to watch my best friend at Cheerleading practice (She actually did have practice!)... But I waited about ten minutes and my ex came out of dentention. He must have noticed me sitting by his locker because he put his head down right away. He put some stuff into his locker and then sat down next to me. Of course he asked why I was there and I explained how I saw him and decided that I'd stay after so we could hang out. And I also told him how my parents weren't picking me up until two hours from then...

I just kind of sat with him for a while and eventually he asked if I wanted to go for a walk. Of course I happily obliqued and him and I walked over to the always deserted hallway that was behind the band room. There were some people playing music in there, and my ex, who plays the piano and the drums, mentioned how badly they were playing. Me, being a totally ditz when it comes to how music is supposed to sound, just didn't say anything. I think him and I stood there, him just holding me, for at least an hour and a half....

We both loved each other so much... But we never could come up with words to say to each other... We only ever cuddled. And he would briefly kiss me when he said good-bye after us hanging out after school (four times)... And now, practically a year after him breaking up with me. And practically a year after him getting himself a new girlfriend (Who has the most hideous buck-teeth).....

I still love him....