~~~ヾ(＾∇＾) EDIT ME!!! NAO. ヾ(´･ω･｀)

[Nei1]

So these two roaches, Tom and Oscar, are hanging out next to a dumpster enjoying a snack. “Hey Tom” said Oscar to his friend, “You know that restaurant down the block? I went there yesterday to pick up some scraps, and I couldn’t believe how clean it was, I could practically see my reflection through the shiny waxed floor.” “Oscar” hollered Tom spitting the food out of his mouth, “please not while I am eating!!”  

[Nei1]

I can't play potty games anyhow.

I was coming back from visiting my son in my Miami and I stopped at a rest stop to use the bathroom. I just sat down on the toilet when I heard a voice coming from the stall next to mine, “Hey! How’s it going?” Although I was quite surprised, and I wasn’t in the habit of conversing to the people next to me in the stall, I nevertheless answered him, “I’m fine” I said “thanks for asking.” “What are you doing?” Asked the same voice. To be honest I was a bit taken aback by the brazenness of this fellow, but I would never ignore anyone so I calmly answered, “I’m relieving myself.” Then I heard the same voice again, “I’m going to have to call you back, some smart-aleck is answering all of my questions.”  

[Nei1]

NEI=nuclear energy industry
What do you call a group of nuclear engineers doing sit-ups and crunches?
The core development team.  

[Nei1]

I have a fear of speed bumps but I'm slowly getting over it.  

[Nei1]

Have a blast! But not in your pants.  

[Nei1]

A photon blast.  

[Nei1]

A Blue Burst.  

[Nei1]

Eep!  

[Nei1]

 

[Nei1]

 

[Nei1]

*thump*  

[Nei1]

 

[Nei1]

Knight 1: We are now no longer the Knights who say Nei.
Knight 2: NEI.
Other Knights: Shh...
Knight 1: We are now the Knights who say..."Ekki-ekki-ekki-ekki-PTANG. Zoom-Boing, z'nourrwringmm."  

[Nei1]

Nei1

Knight 1: We are now no longer the Knights who say Nei.
Knight 2: NEI.
Other Knights: Shh...
Knight 1: We are now the Knights who say..."Ekki-ekki-ekki-ekki-PTANG. Zoom-Boing, z'nourrwringmm."

http://vocaroo.com/i/s1fLHrQcSMh8  

[Nei1]

Bleepity-bleep. Cuss cuss cuss.