Why did you divorce the person above you?

[JTN]

She always greets me at the door with automatic weapon fire.

 

[Shy_Meganekko]

He doesn't understand my tough love.  

[Zero-The-Hunter 500]

If both mates show tough love, its not love, its hell unleashed.  

[Shy_Meganekko]

His dream job was to be a marriage counselor.  

[HUNNY8801]

She kept wearing cuter clothes than me, and she didn't have a p***s. ;o(  

[Deathfrost]

She kept yelling "RAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAPE!!!" whenever we were out in public & I got tired of having to constantly explain to people that she has Turrets Syndrome... mrgreen  

[Shy_Meganekko]

I must have been really drunk to not have noticed that he lacks a head.  

[Lady_Conspiracy]

she wouldn't fix her rotting foot and it was starting to smell  

[Deathfrost]

She "conspired" against me with her sailor scout cohorts... mrgreen  

[Marissa on My Mind]

He beat me to death with a golf club.  

[CabinFeverKitty]

Their support of crazy capitalist would probably make me want to beat him with a golf club if I hadn't  

[Shy_Meganekko]

He took Britney Spears' song "Circus" too literally.  

[Sup3r_Bwahaha]

They turned me into a cat.  

[Arcane Psycho]

They're a cat!  

[Deathfrost]

I thought I was marrying the girl in their signature, but instead I got the avi... sweatdrop