Why did you divorce the person above you?

[Lady_Conspiracy]

She was trying to KILL ME!

... I think...  

[d a r k-n e k o-g u r ll]

She always thought i was going to kill her...  

[Shy_Meganekko]

She has a thing for weddings...she's divorcing me just so we can get married again.  

[Lady_Conspiracy]

She refused to tell me what that key was for  

[Living Ink]

I made a mistake... I used one of her maps instead of a paper towel... She never forgave me, it was awful how she would not stop talking about it, I finally had to end it just to get some peace.  

[Shy_Meganekko]

He keeps screaming "THIS IS SPARTA!!!!!!"  

[A death bird]

she sayed that i had no face  

[Lady_Conspiracy]

The grammar police arrested him. I don't date/marry criminals. Had to file for divorce.  

[Shy_Meganekko]

Her job is to make conspiracy theories and travel...so whenever she embarks on an adventure, she calls back and wakes me up at unreasonable hours to warn me of aliens and vampires.  

[Lady Pepperell]

She attacks me with her horns  

[-Anon Darkness-]

I divorced her because she got to the pot of gold at the end of the rainbow and left me with a box of lucky charms cereal.  

[JTN]

She always blamed me whenever one of my mostly harmless experiments went amok and terrorized the local villages.  

[ChronosTimeMage]

I divorced him because when i woke up in the middle of the night I was strapped to a doctor's work table with JTN over me about to 'examine' me with a kunai over my heart (if the cops didn't appear before he began i wouldn't know what would happen... gonk )  

[Lady_Conspiracy]

He was so traumatized he would wake up screaming and flailing and injuring myself and my dog. It didn't help that his creepy ex kept showing up to "complete his examination."

Run, run as fast as you can!  

[JTN]

She always folded the maps wrong and they never fit in the glove compartment properly... which was strange since we use a GPS.