Stuff you NEVER wanted to know about your family....

[ALLIGAT0R TEARS]

SMOOCHERS

O wow this thread is perfect.
I have a paper due monday that is "write a 3 page paper on a family secret"
I really don't want to start it yet.
But its like I keep getting signs to do it.

I can't think of any good secrets that DONT belong on Jerry Springer.
All our secrets are just about relationship and who's doing who. :/

Well my great grandfather and grandmother were cousins.
There are alot of stories like that. -.-
They lived in Puerto Rico.

gonk  

[I_toldyabish]

My Family and I were going back to our house because we went to eat at Legends.So my dad and my Cousin (He's 21) were dicussing d**k sizes.My dad said his was so big he has to get extra large condoms,and I've seen the condoms before when I was getting the keys from his drawer. o.e  

[Pasithea]

It's not really disturbing to me (it takes a lot to disturb me to be honest. lol) but my mom told me all 3 of us, my brothers and I, were conceived via drunken sex on the bathroom floor. lol  

[Miner of Skies]

Once I was arranging my brother's bed ( that lazy dummy stressed )
Then found condoms under it..... eek

I told my mom about them...

She said that yes she used them, and that we would be more than 10 kids if she didn't gonk


But, oh well... I guess some people never get bored from making love
(even when they get old) sweatdrop  

[Pasithea]

MS-Lin

Once I was arranging my brother's bed ( that lazy dummy stressed )
Then found condoms under it..... eek

I told my mom about them...

She said that yes she used them, and that we would be more than 10 kids if she didn't gonk


But, oh well... I guess some people never get bored from making love
(even when they get old) sweatdrop

.......

Why were they under your brother's bed? lol  

[indigo_fairy13]

i was concieved when my parents where drunk and they just met one and other but it doesn't bother me anymore. but what does is that i found out that my mother and her sister where raped by theire stepfather that was more choking then how i was concieved crying  

[ii Toxic_Markers ii]

I found out my brother sleep walks.... How did I find out? I followed him down stairs to the washer room to see what he was doing and found him trying to piss in the washer .-. *scared for life*
My mom has a rose tattoo on her chest; no story needed....
My parents told me they think I'm physcotic at times; not something I wanted to know XD
And I didn't know EVERY women on my mom's side had to get their gallbladders out; guess who's next in twenty or so years?!  

[Inamax]

At first I was a negative pregnancy test. And they weren't really wanting me but once she got pregnant... here I am.
And my dad was a rocker punk that got his hair painted and it was long and he smoked. So did my mom, which is more disturbing.  

[Onigetoe]

I think the worst one for me was when I was doing dishes (thank god I wear rubber gloves) and my cat Kayko came into the kitchen with something in his mouth and laid down and started chewing on it. It was a used condom.... I know for a fact my parents don't have sex anymore (my mom hates my dad) and so I take it from him, throw it away and stand at the door closest to the hallway but gives me a clear veiw of the living room. Kayko went through the dinning room door at this point in time.

So I'm watching him and he goes under the sofa and grabs another one. So i come in and look under the sofa. There were avout 20 used condoms and a bottle of lube. My aunt and unlce from Edmonton had been in the living room because our spare room was full of stuff from the reno that we had done...

I really didn't need to know that or find all of that under the sofa.

Now everytine my boyfriend puts one on I think of that and kinda sick... Not a good thing because we have already had one pregnancy scare.  

[City Pop Barbie]

Onigetoe

I think the worst one for me was when I was doing dishes (thank god I wear rubber gloves) and my cat Kayko came into the kitchen with something in his mouth and laid down and started chewing on it. It was a used condom.... I know for a fact my parents don't have sex anymore (my mom hates my dad) and so I take it from him, throw it away and stand at the door closest to the hallway but gives me a clear veiw of the living room. Kayko went through the dinning room door at this point in time.

So I'm watching him and he goes under the sofa and grabs another one. So i come in and look under the sofa. There were avout 20 used condoms and a bottle of lube. My aunt and unlce from Edmonton had been in the living room because our spare room was full of stuff from the reno that we had done...

I really didn't need to know that or find all of that under the sofa.

Now everytine my boyfriend puts one on I think of that and kinda sick... Not a good thing because we have already had one pregnancy scare.

yeah, my brother did something like that...but he had sex on a chair and we threw it out...I told my sister to sit in a chair and she freaked out thinking it was the same one, but she was fine after I told her we threw that one away.

 

[X_icewhip_X]

Well, I got nothing to special, but a few years ago, I woke up in the middle of the night, and I forgot I needed to ask my Dad something. SO I walked in, opened the door, and right there...

Was his bare naked butt!

He was trying to "get it on" with my Mom, but apparently my shriek of horror killed the mood! My Mom thanked me for the next morning (apparently, she was too tired last night)! rofl

And that's how I know know what my father's a** looks like! *shudders*  

[vanlili]

Wow... Where do I begin?
The 2-3 weeks ago, heard my parents fighting (normal) and heard that my mom was upset for her birthday because she didn't feel "special." Dad asked for more information "What are you talking about!!?" He said yelled. Mom said she was "bored". Dad yelled, so that why you cheeted one me!? cuase you where bored!? Mom goes, No!! Don't bring that up! Dad keeps yelling, I even caught you- TWICE cheeting on me! And I still am with you!
Well there's more to that story but I have more. And I was in partial shock so I didn't really remember the rest. And this fight was at night when I was in bed so I woke up at 11:00 to this fight.
Next one. About a year ago, (Idk how this fight started) I guess my dad saw smoke or something coming out from the bathroom door. Dad walked in on mom. He started screaming, "YOU'RE SMOKING!?!" I almost died there too. I was on my PSP, I had just got Internet on there so I don't really remember the rest to that. All I know is that my mom was smoking. I don't know how long she has been doing it, but I know it wasn't long. (Thank god)
Well that's some of the stuff I never wish I knew. I don't really tell people about this, only my best friend, who is a guy, who I have a crush on. He knows I like him and I know he likes me. (That was completely off topic. xD ) As you can see, my life is rough.  

[Shino Babie]

my grandma is a txt aholic! lol  

[vanlili]

Shino Babie

my grandma is a txt aholic! lol

... Woah... How old is she?  

[Killed By The Guardians]

Wow, sorry but I got a kick out of a lot of those events rofl

Unfortunately...I don't know anything like this stuff about my family DX