Below Me

[ThisEmptySoul]

Hell yeah! Throwing paint, dishing out unjust insults, making over-the-top and inaccurate analogies, focusing more on shock value than the message trying to be portrayed, considering animals better than humans..... sounds like my kind of people! Where do I sign up?! xd

Below me can talk to animals.  

[QuestionableMeatProducts]

And as a result, I'm scarred for life after watching a National Geographic special "Mating Rituals of the Elephant Seal". CANNOT BE UNHEARD.

Below me is an amazing chef, with at least 3 culinary degrees.  

[Nei1]

You'll just love my tasty dishes. I even best all the Iron Chefs with my food. The secret is my vile of pure flavor which brings out the ultimate flavor in my food. It's laced with a little LSD. xd

Below me has won the million gold lotto.  

[Ringlefinch]

Wh...what!! No I never!!! Shhhh!! Keep it down. My letterbox cant handle the amount of begging letters as it is!!

Bellow me holds a masters degree in snail farming and feels a burning desire to pass there vast knowledge on to all of us in the hope we'll all take up the hobby  

[Wretched Soul]

Ain't nothing wrong with snails, son. You'd be surprised how lucrative this business can be - Escargo is considered a rare treat.

Below me wants a large dish of snails.  

[lady ayami chan]

i need snails just one large dish of snails!!
why are you all looking at me like that...
I won't eat them or anything...
what do i need them for?
umm well that is clearly none of your business.
*continues to fill a plate with snails.*

below me is a devious person who portrays a persona of someone nice and caring. lol  

[bandaidd]

Completely false! I am even more nice and caring than my devious persona appears. *slips snails from the Lady's plate into pocketses*

below me wants to help me pelt a certain someone with snails  

[lady ayami chan]

ohh snail throwing! I'm in!
who are we pelting again?
it's not me is it? sweatdrop

below me is actually a Broadway dancer.  

[Psyzapp]

*puts on her tap shoes*
5…6…7…8
There's NO business like SHOW business like NO business I KNOW…
*does elaborate Broadway style dance to go with song*

Below me gives me a standing ovation.  

[Invisible Nightengale]

Bravo! (Mass amounts of clapping.) The person below me is my loyal and obediant servant who does anything I want without question or complaint.  

[Nei1]

Yes Mistress, I only live to serve you.

Below me is planning a coup.  

[ThisEmptySoul]

Screw this "serving without question" business. We do all the manual labor and have become much stronger than she will ever be. It would be all too easy to just overpower her and turn -her- into the servant. twisted *runs off to push Invisible Nightengale around*

Below me sleeps on a mattress stuffed with $100 bills.  

[Nei1]

EEP! *tries to stuff the bills back in her mattress* I hope no one saw.

Below me can't sleep because of a single pea in the bed.  

[Gilda Geezer]

Oh, this bed is sooooooooooo lumpy *tosses and turns, finally hitting her head in to the headboard* Uh, ow, oh, now I'm sleepy

Below me will remove the pea from under my mattress so I can get some sleep.  

[Psyzapp]

Oh…I see the problem here. Just hold on a sec Gilda. *reaches under mattress and searches* Where is it…AH HA *pulls pea out from mattress and flicks it out the window* There you go…problem solved.

Below me gets hit in the head by the pea.