Kidnapping?

[Siumbering Princess22]

So me and my daughters father haven't been getting along. And I have tried so hard to stay civil with him, and let him see his daughter as much as possible. *he lives 2 and a half hours away*. And he has just been giving me such a hard time. Every time he called he would talk about trying to get back with me. And I sat there and argued about it when people told me I shouldn't even be letting him talk to me about anything but kaitlynn. but because i cared I wanted to let him talk and get out his feelings *all the time*. Anyway he knows I've been seeing someone else, and he isn't very happy. Well he found out my new guy was going to be staying with me a couple times. And he called me all night long saying he was going to come here and beat him up at 4 in the morning. Then he said he was gonna take me to court to get full custody of my daughter.

He called the next day apologized said he wouldn't take me to court he just wanted to see kaitlynn more blah blah. So he came and picked her up today and she is going to stay with him for the week. My problem is what if he decides not to bring her back?? What if he keeps her? Hes legally her father..he is on her birth certificate. Can I still call the cops and have them get her back?? Is it considered kidnapping?? What can I do?? I plan on going this week to get temporary custody of her. How long does it take for temp custody to go through??

 

[ThisEmptySoul]

I can't answer all the questions, but I do know that you can charge him for kidnapping even if he is the father if he does not have full custody. I don't know how long you would have to wait for it to be considered kidnapping, though. I have read of people charging either the mother or father of kidnapping when they took off with the child when they did not have full custody, but in the cases I've heard of, they usually left the state so I don't know if that makes it more of a kidnapping case than just keeping the child at your home or not, but I would imagine as long as he does not have full custody and therefore does not legally have the right to keep the child at all times, then you could charge him for kidnapping if he refuses to give the child back at any point.

My sister's ex actually called the police on her once because she would not drop their kids off at his grandparents house when he asked her to. {They live in the same city.} In the end she was not charged, though... he just wanted to be an a**.  

[Patron with a Mission]

I would strongly suggest getting those questions to a lawyer just in case. I can't answer most of them but I do know you should tread carefully; this guy sounds like a real manipulator. Just my two cents.  

[Shinigami Unity]

Are you two married? If so, you are screwed.

If not - you technically have legal custody of your children - you just don't know it. So if he doesn't return them, the cops can (hopefully) track him down and cart his butt off to jail.

If you ARE married he can actually take them and you'll have a much more difficult time getting them back. Then you'll probably have to wait until your divorce is over and hopefully win full custody of them in that case. Because while you're in the middle of your divorce, the courts will grant temporary custody - and since he and you are arguing so much if he had the kids, he'd probably get it (the temporary one). I know this because I had the same questions during my own divorce.

I really really hope for your sake you aren't married. Because in that case you have everything and he has nothing.

Please please please don't put up with so much. You can do everything to get him to see his daughter - but that doesn't mean you have to put up with his verbal abuse.

Also - my one nuggest of advice: CALL THE POLICE if it ever gets even a little bit ugly. Courts don't care how much he smacks your head into the wall if you don't call the police.  

[Siumbering Princess22]

thanks all for the advice!

Me and him are not married, and I am on my way to filing for temporary custody *full custody as well but i need temp right now for cases like this till we go to court* he still has her and hes suppose to bring her back sunday morning, and I been kissing his a** hoping he will. And once I have her back I will not let him see her until we've gone to court and hes been given visitation rights. Or until my temp custody goes through so that way if he does decide to keep her for longer I can still call the cops and he can be arrested. I'm also thinking of getting a restraining order from him because hes threatened me and people in my life multiple times but I don't know how that will work once visitation comes in??  

[Niran_Betta_Fish]

If you are the custodial parent, yes. You can't call them for his normal visitation or what have you. If he runs or refuses to return them, yes, it is kidnapping.  

[Siumbering Princess22]

Niran_Betta_Fish

If you are the custodial parent, yes. You can't call them for his normal visitation or what have you. If he runs or refuses to return them, yes, it is kidnapping.

what exactly is a custodial parent?  

[Siumbering Princess22]

So my daughter is on her way back home right now! I am so happy I wanna cry.I know it has only been a week.But it is the longest I have ever been away from her since shes been born.It has killed me inside every night seeing her empty bed. So this is the best july 4th ever.*also glad I decided to drink last night and not tonight* lol. smile smile smile smile smile smile

 

[Shinigami Unity]

The custodial parent is the one who has custody of the kid. If you are not married and he has not fought you for joint custody - you are the custodial parent. At least, in ND it's that way - maybe it's different in your case.

If you have a restraining order against him, I believe he won't be able to pick your daughter up at your residence. It might be that someone else may have to drop her off or be there with her when he picks her up.

Another thing to consider if you have enough evidence to support it is supervised visitation. I'm not sure how that works because I wasn't smart enough to file for it.

Good luck. It is hard to be away from your kids - I still have a tough time with it too.  

[Sweet_lil_tomboy]

If you two aren't married then you have custody of you daughter. It doesn't matter that his name is on the birth certificate. If he doesn't bring her back on time then yes call the police and have him arrested. As for a formal custody order, that depends on your local court dockets. In some places it can take 30 days and other places it can take 6 months. You really don't need an attorney to do this. Most judicial courts have the forms on line you can download and print them off, fill them out and file them. There is a fee for filing and this will vary depending on where you live. Call your local courts and get the information you need from them before filing.
If you have had soul custody her since day one and he just pops in whenever the court will most likely award you temporary custody until the matter is completely resolved.
Good luck sweetie