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 Posted: Fri Mar 26, 2010 10:52 pm
I think that I've definately been sending out the wrong message to this one boy lately.
There's a boy, he's younger than me, and I was friends with his older brother before he graduated. Anyway, I've kind of started hanging out with his brother again, so that's how I've gotten closer to this boy. Like super close, as of late. Close enough to where it's pushing the boundaries of a normal friendship. So now it's more of a "friends with benefits" type of deal, cuz I guess I never really set any boundaries to begin with. Granted, the furthest we've gotten is me sitting on his lap with his arms around my waist and us holding hands and kisses on the cheek... BUT STILL. I don't want us to go any further, and that's my point.
He's not my boyfriend, nor do I want him to be. Sure, I love the attention I get from him and all, but it's really just sending other people the wrong message. Especially when there are other guys out there that I am very much interested in.
What ever should I do?
gonk
Please give me a better answer than just "stop," please.
heart
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Posted: Fri Mar 26, 2010 11:14 pm
omg.... thats really hard.... but why did u let it go that far... u should have told him no from the very beginning. but really, show him u dont think of him like that, drop some hints. but if he turns out to be kinda dense u should drop some REALLY BIG hints and then maybe by then he'll confront u about it and then u can tell him just straight out or something close to that.
i hope that helped.... im not really good at this kind of thing.
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Posted: Fri Mar 26, 2010 11:24 pm
candayluvcheese omg.... thats really hard.... but why did u let it go that far... u should have told him no from the very beginning. but really, show him u dont think of him like that, drop some hints. but if he turns out to be kinda dense u should drop some REALLY BIG hints and then maybe by then he'll confront u about it and then u can tell him just straight out or something close to that. i hope that helped.... im not really good at this kind of thing. Because I have no self control and I'm kind of like that with most guys. razz Just not to the same extremes. What do you mean A REALLY BIG HINT?
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Posted: Sat Mar 27, 2010 12:37 pm
Eek. Yeah, you got yourself in a bad position. But we learn from mistakes.
Men are more forward than women. I think he would appreciate it more if you told him (in private) straight that you are uncomfortable with being more than friends. If he says things like "but you never complained", maybe tell him you were thinking about where it was going and aren't ready for that kind of thing.
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Posted: Sat Mar 27, 2010 8:10 pm
That's exactly how I was before I got with my boyfriend. Bathing in the attention of my male friends was easy and it does take some control to not let things get to a point.
I'd suggest slowly weening yourself off him. Boys are pretty dense, they dont get hints so if you have to be blunt when you say that you didnt want things to go that far.
Sometimes remembering to set boundaries is tough but it's better to set them sooner or later!
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Posted: Sat Mar 27, 2010 8:16 pm
i've never been in a situation like that before soo..
actually,i've never been in a relationship.. sweatdrop
anyways,chu should probably tell him the next time chu see him o;
if chu feel that you're not ready for that,just tell him C:
basically,listen to the other peeps here >w<
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Posted: Sun Mar 28, 2010 3:08 am
theyre giving some pretty good advice. thats really the best thing to do, either tell him straight out that you dont want to go to far or drop some big hints, like when your talking... talk about how you dont want a boyfriend or something
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Posted: Sun Mar 28, 2010 6:31 pm
t a i l e r r_2013 theyre giving some pretty good advice. thats really the best thing to do, either tell him straight out that you dont want to go to far or drop some big hints, like when your talking... talk about how you dont want a boyfriend or something Well, I don't wanna lie to the boy. Plus, if I said I don't want a boyfriend, he would know that's a lie. And he knows the guy I wanna go out with too, and that whole long story that we'll save for another time. rolleyes
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Posted: Tue Mar 30, 2010 4:32 pm
Sit him down and talk about what you both want your relationship to be like. In this case I am using the word relationship to mean the kind of interaction between two people, not that you are dating.
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