Daddy Issues~~Boo. [Post if ya like. Haha. ;P] | Page 1 | 12. ✿ - - - Journal Writings | Guild Forums

Miamiakima

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Posted: Sun Aug 29, 2010 4:04 pm

Dear...hopefully nice people/girls of Gaia, lol,

So, the relationship with my parents is kind of, complicated?

I mean, I doubt I'm the only person on the planet that get's extremely frustrated/mad with my parents a lot, but that's not my point.

My dad and I are almost complete polar opposites; the only thing in common is our need to...idk-maybe want to fix things/people, and I'm the only kid with his eyes.

But when I say opposite...I mean like, I like chocolate ice cream, I like small towns, love animals, the country, can only stand the beach for like...2 or 3 hours, I sort of see things in grey-like I don't look at them all black and white, ect ect...

While my dad likes vanilla ice cream, likes big cities, is allergic and sometimes can't stand animals (also has a very sensitive nose), likes to stay at the beach literally ALL DAY, he looks at things either one way or another-never in between, he also apparently doesn't like to say sorry...he thinks he's ALWAYS right about things and get's easily angry and offended and is very defensive about like every little thing...

I can't even stand being around him anymore because he just makes me so mad I feel like doing bad things to myself...and I know that may sound a little bit overdramatic, but I'm being truthful, here!

I want to SCREAM and YELL at him and tell him how I feel, but then he'll just yell at me and blah blah blah...

But even if he didn't yell at me and like "Oh, ok. I'm sorry honey." I still wouldn't be happy.

I'm afraid that that relationship with my dad, if there was even ever one there, is permanently broken and there's nothing I can do to fix it.

When I was little my parents were both always really busy, so my older sister (the one closest to my age) sorta 'half time' helped me and took care of me too, lol.

I don't know if maybe I'm still mad at him for just not being there...or...idk...what I wanted to talk about more is a little TOO personal...so maybe I should wait and think about talking about that lol. It's about my mom, so...

But yeah...idk what to do about my dad. I was thinking that I would let him help me get into college (although that's like four years away...Dx), let him help me out with other stuff to get ready to move in on my own and everything...and then once I move out I don't have to see him or speak to him much if I don't want to, so. But I was planning to keep in contact with my mom; since I get along with her a TON better than my dad lol.

You can comment about what I said below if you want.
Idc.
I just wanted to try this out and see if I liked it or not haha. :] Cuz I don't really have people to talk to about stuff. :]

-M I A heart

Posted: Sun Aug 29, 2010 5:06 pm

Well, excuse me for having little to no patience for posts about how you dont get along with your father. Please understand that while I can understand that theses issues anger you, they seem altogether petty to me.
Yes, you have highly contrasting opinions.
Yes, that will hurt your father-daughter relationship.
Yes, I realize your father wasn't there for you when you were young.

I know that's hard.
Well, kind of. I've never had these issues.
Just, why hurt yourself over contrasting opinions?

RosesFallingLikeRain

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Miamiakima

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Posted: Mon Aug 30, 2010 8:30 am

It's alright. We all have are opinions about stuff.
And I'm not trying to sound annoying, like a drama queen or petty-and pardon if I sound rude saying this-but if you haven't had 'daddy issues' then maybe you don't fully understand.
But whatever. I don't want it to grow into an argument. :[

Posted: Tue Aug 31, 2010 8:01 am

I've got Daddy Issues of my own, if I am to be completely honest.
Just not these ones, per se.
No, I'm not trying to sstart an argument.
You don't sound petty, don't worry. Just the hurting yourself over the problem sounds incredibly-- for lack of a better word-- idiotic.

I don't know what it's like not having your father there for you as a child, and having disagreements when your older. I really don't.

If you were to twist some parts of my life, you could say, however that I'v gone through exactly this. It really depends.

Anyways, what did you mean by 'do things to yourself'?

RosesFallingLikeRain

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Miamiakima

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Posted: Wed Sep 01, 2010 2:12 pm

Ohh I'm sorry. I misunderstood. :/

Ok good...lol...
And I said it makes me want to do bad things to myself-not that I have, exactly.

And what I meant was ya' know-stupid things like cutting. Which now that I read it over it does sound idiotic lol. :]
I think I was just overacting because of a lot of stress I've been feeling more and more lately from friends being stupid, so. The worst I would probably ever do it like...pff...idek. xD

Posted: Thu Sep 09, 2010 10:44 pm

I understand you for the most part haha
(Its pretty hard to understand someone fully unless you are in the exact same place if you know what I mean)

I have father issues as well. My dad is actually ALOT like me though, but we get mad at each other for the things we dont like in ourselves.
For a long time I thought my relationship with my dad was unfixable. But being an adult now, I see that I have to do my part to really understand and respect my father. He was away at work most of my childhood or just being generally busy, but I see now that he did that so I could be provided for.

Now that I'm in college, I don't have to stay in contact with my dad if I don't want, but I thought about how he's getting pretty old now. And how I do not want to be at his funaral thinking "I wish..." or "I should have..." thoughts.

Your dad doesn't seem like a real hatefull guy. You guys just seem like you're not getting along right now, so I'd say.. cut your dad some slack haha. He's older than you AND he's a guy. SO he may just not know how to interact with you. Help him out in that aspect. If you want to improve your relationship, you have to start with yourself 3nodding

I hope I'm not sounding to preachy... haha I hope my patchwork-rant/advice could help you out some.

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Sumomo4life

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Posted: Tue Dec 13, 2011 12:27 am

Atleast your father seems to be in your life alot ^^; my father and mother were divorced and i went to his house for visitations every other weekend from the age of 1 year old. My father said hi to me when i got in the car and that was it unless i got a bad grade and then he just screamed at me, he treated my half sister like a princess, bought her a ton of s**t and i only got stuff on christmas. This went on for years and years me visiting him and him not saying much.. then he divorced his 2nd wife who wasn't my mother after being married to her for 14 years.. after that he started talking to me a little but still not much at all he'd just sleep while i was there or go out with his friends. He was a severe alcoholic. At the age of 16 my mom left .. told me to live with my dad.. he was then living in a camper.. one that sits on the back of a truck.. and it was winter and had no heat heh that lasted about 3 or 4 days and then i went to live with my grandma who beat me with random objects.. base ball bats, brooms, belts, the metal part of a flyswatter, boards etc.. i wasn't allowed getting my license, lived out in the country, and couldn't get a job because the only work to be had was 15 miles away and i had no ride into town.. this didn't change until i was in my 20s. I would love to of had a father that talked to me enough to not get along with him ^^; btw he died he had a stroke and several heart attacks.. to spite his not talking much.. and not being there for me much.. i still miss him.. and i miss my grandma.. even though she beat me with random objects she also died.. lung cancer/heart attack. So being angry with your dad is much better than what could happen.

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