What ticks me off with gay media

[Manga-ka Ninrai]

It's been on my mind for a while, and I feel like ranting about it!

I'm not sure if you noticed but In my (probably biased) opinion, the media makes most gays and lesbians look like we never have long lasting realtionships.

I didn't really notice this untill I watched Brother and Sisters for the first time (this may be a SPOILER), it was the episode where Scott told his husban he cheated on him once, awhile back.

They have been married for years, there's a romance, and there was no sex! Honestly, I was suprised. Most shows I've seen (mostly made for general public) shows gays and lesbians going through romance after romance, or a lot of sex. There's hardly marriage or long reationships. Sometimes, none at all. You get to see the heterosexual couples go a few rounds and the gays, none. emo

It kind of sets a sterotype for us. I remember a friend making a comment to me, when she was dumped, she wishes she was attracted to women like me, then she'd "have short sweet, sex filled relationships." It might have been that way in the 1960's and before maybe, but that was for different reasons...

I wonder If I only feel this way...  

[NegaScott_7x7]

Straight people don't always have long lasting relationships.
I don't really know why its so bad when gay people don't but its ok to not acknowledge that straight do the same as gay people all the time.

Gay guys have alot of sex, so do straight people.
Lesbians cheat on eachother, so do straight people.

And about sex, people act like sex is sooo bad. The fact is that its an important part of any relationship. So what if a couple has alot of sex, that could just mean they have a healthy sex life. Its one thing to have a sex life and another to basically be in a relationship that is sex only. If theres only sex, then I wouldn't consider that a real relationship.

But in Queer as Folk I think some of them get married. In the L Word I don't think anyone gets married but theres some relationships where its basically a marriage.  

[Le Scratch]

I have been in three relationships (two close by and one long-distance, currently in my third which is a close one) in my life. The first was for about six months, the second for a year and a half, and this third one stands at nine weeks or so. I'd say anything beyond six months can qualify as long, anything beyond two years as very long.

I don't pay much mind to the media, but I know that the general opinion is that we are either all love and no sex, or all sex and no love. I like both, and I have both in my current relationship. The media has never been a good measure of any subculture, or even any 'main' culture, in this country. Part of the reason I pay no mind to the media.  

[ForteAmora]

What really bugs me is that with gay men in media, more often than not they are incredibly femnine. Almost like they have no masculinity at all when in fact, most of the gay boys I know are.. average boys...

 

[Gordums]

Well let's look back in history when homosexuality wasn't prominent at all. At this time, it was jsut heterosexuality and every assumed it was the only thing because I mean, nobody was seen doing homosexual things, and often it was covered up.
But when homosexuality developed, it was soemthign new and caused them to define homosexuality as "Not normal" or "not heterosexual", which eventually led tot he definition of heterosexuality. Before this, heterosexuality was structured as the normal, the only path that existed. Rules were set out how to live the life of a heterosexual: monogamous courtship with the opposite sex, eventually marriage, and produce offspring to continue the lineage.

However, once homosexuality hit the scene, it sort of threw a wrench into heterosexuality. People of the same sex have sexual relations with eachother?! OUTRAGE!
So, the structure that was built with the heteroseuxal community could not be applied to the homosexuals who could not bear children, thus, no structure was established for them.

Without defining how homosexuals should live their homosexual lives (other than TURRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRN STRAIIIIIGHT!!!!!!), no structure for intimacy was designed - ie, no marriage or monogamy. Without this monogamy or intimacy structure, homosexuals were free to have intimate relations with eachother and be polyamorous, and as such, they were seen as such because if you were allowed to have sex with everyone you could, you would jump on that bandwagon like it was going out of style.

As such, homosexuality was seen as an unstructred/uncivilized society that was polyamorous and etc.

And thats how the media portrays the queer community

 

[Mystic Requiem]

@ Gordums: You, sir, just made my mind melt with that post. Excellent job.

Well with most things in the media, hetero or homo, the relationships are "first date -> sex -> breakup" or at least that's what I've seen. Probably the reason why there is no marriage is because very few states accept gay marriage. I can't speak for many shows since I don't have a wide view of television watching, the only show I know of that has a semi-long running homosexual relationship is Glee.

Aside from that tiny tidbit, I can't say much else. Sorry.