Discuss: Age Differences

[MommiiDearest]

Personally, I think no more than a five year difference, any more than that and you just really have nothing in common in to respect to what you grew up around.
For example: There is a six year difference between me and my brother. Our childhood were completely different with style of clothing, music, toys, television. We have nothing in common what so ever.
The same basically goes for dating.
That is my opinion anyways.  

[Labtech Abi]

The thing is, people are at different points in their lives at different ages. I've always been reallly ageist for some reason (I can't explain why), so I'll always advocate for the 2 year rule until you're 18. Because honestly, when you're young you grow so crazily and dramatically in a single year, think of what different place maturity wise someone more than 2 years is than you! Think of yourself 3 years ago! And don't be like "Well I'm mature for my age, blah blah..." I thought I was mature for my age at 16 and hell, even my parents agreed. But looking back I still did, said, and thought some really stupid s**t back then.

Like, yeah. I dunno. Also I think another good rule of thumb is to try dating someone who's in life where you are. If you're in high school, try dating someone in high school. They'll be able to relate to your problems and be there with you. If you're in college, for god's sakes why are you dating someone in high school when you're in a new chapter of your life? (Okay that sounds assholish, but, really...) As you get older and the maturity gap shrinks, that's when it's more likely to be successful. Okay so maybe your loved one is finishing college and you've got a job already, that's more manageable.

I'm not gonna be an a*****e saying you can't have a successful, loving relationship with someone way older than you. Love is love, after all. I just find it very hard to... buy, I guess. Like I said, I'm suuuper ageist for some reason! It just really bothers me! So I apologize if I sound like an a*****e!  

[Guardian of the Sky]

I'd think it would haved to do with the age you are. I know personally I will not date over 10 years older than me and I'm 22. and if you're under 18 you have no reason to be with someone over 18. True Love will wait.  

[Dove_of_Dawn]

My parents are 10 years apart. My mom is 55, dad 45. They've been together for 17 years now. They're happy, in love, and honestly, the age gap isn't a huge deal. My dad heckles her about it sometimes, but it's all in good fun. It can work, but it depends on the people.  

[Aquatic_blue]

Large age gaps like a 20 year old dating somebody who is 65 freaks me out a bit. I guess it's because there can be a lot of difference between lifestyle. For example, perhaps the 20 year old likes to go clubbing with friends on a weekend, but the 65 year old would rather stay home and watch tv? Or, what is the 20 year old is extremely physically active and loves hiking, working out, and many types of sports and the 65 year old is unable to participate in those activities? It might be frustrating.

It's most concerning to me when you have a 14 year old dating someone who is 30 or something of that nature. At that point, a person needs to wonder if the relationship is even healthy. A teenager is still growing in life and doesn't know everything they want, they don't always know what they want as a career, they don't always think much about how they will support themselves in the future if they live with parents or someone else who pays the bills, they don't always think about things on an adult level, of course so relationships like that I don't see necessary at all.

Although, once a person hits 18 - it's their decision on their age preference and if their preferred age gap works for them then that's how it's gonna be.

I remember being in high school and it was considered gross or desperate for a senior to date a freshman. People who dated that were senior and freshman would tend to get a lot of hassle - even though the age gap was like 4 years, which isn't totally huge. Although, in high school things like that seemed to be a huge deal with most students.

I noticed after high school and more into college - an 18 year old could date someone who is 25 and it didn't matter because they are both adults at that point. It's no longer weird, gross, desperate, or strange because they have made their own age preference as an adult.

I always told myself, "I only want a guy that's 2 years older than me." and stuck by that. Then at a point, I fell in love, and found out the guy was about 4 years older than I was and I couldn't help it. I made an exception because I loved him for who he was and at that point, and his age was only a few years over my preference so I could deal and now that we're married - I don't really think about our ages much. Our ages is rarely something we really bring up unless we're talking about cartoons, movies, or music that was before our time or filling out documents where they need a birth date =P  

[oTrissa]

I don't care about what the age gap is as long as both people are happy. I do think however if either party is 18 or over both should be, unless it's something like 17 &18.
I am 20 and my BF is 30. We've been dating for two year. He's adorable and I love him. We live together and are super happy. I don't think age makes too much of a difference in mindset, some people will always be immature. I certainly was more immature at 18 but people can grow in a short time. (I moved out a month after I turned 18 so living on your own makes you mature faster, I had moved out a few times at 17 as that was the legal age where I lived as well)

People generally have too many problems with other people's business and need to focus on their own lives. Is you life so dull all you can do is complain about other people you don't even know?  

[oTrissa]

Aquatic_blue

Large age gaps like a 20 year old dating somebody who is 65 freaks me out a bit. I guess it's because there can be a lot of difference between lifestyle. For example, perhaps the 20 year old likes to go clubbing with friends on a weekend, but the 65 year old would rather stay home and watch tv? Or, what is the 20 year old is extremely physically active and loves hiking, working out, and many types of sports and the 65 year old is unable to participate in those activities? It might be frustrating.

It's most concerning to me when you have a 14 year old dating someone who is 30 or something of that nature. At that point, a person needs to wonder if the relationship is even healthy. A teenager is still growing in life and doesn't know everything they want, they don't always know what they want as a career, they don't always think much about how they will support themselves in the future if they live with parents or someone else who pays the bills, they don't always think about things on an adult level, of course so relationships like that I don't see necessary at all.

Although, once a person hits 18 - it's their decision on their age preference and if their preferred age gap works for them then that's how it's gonna be.

I remember being in high school and it was considered gross or desperate for a senior to date a freshman. People who dated that were senior and freshman would tend to get a lot of hassle - even though the age gap was like 4 years, which isn't totally huge. Although, in high school things like that seemed to be a huge deal with most students.

I noticed after high school and more into college - an 18 year old could date someone who is 25 and it didn't matter because they are both adults at that point. It's no longer weird, gross, desperate, or strange because they have made their own age preference as an adult.

I always told myself, "I only want a guy that's 2 years older than me." and stuck by that. Then at a point, I fell in love, and found out the guy was about 4 years older than I was and I couldn't help it. I made an exception because I loved him for who he was and at that point, and his age was only a few years over my preference so I could deal and now that we're married - I don't really think about our ages much. Our ages is rarely something we really bring up unless we're talking about cartoons, movies, or music that was before our time or filling out documents where they need a birth date =P

Generally if someone is 20 dating someone 65 it's because of status and wealth. It's a Sugar Daddy and Sugar Baby relationship that's mutually beneficial but not in the conventional way.