Stessed need advice = .=

[ritsuka kitty cat]

Thanks all, I love everything you all said and will take it into consideration.

 

[neko-mata-01]

well honestly that just seems utterly selfish on her part. how can she tell other people to care more about her than other people.
also whats this...
"Once the clock strikes midnight, from the 30th to the 31st, you and your friends will be subject to a lesson" what is she cursing you?....  

[ritsuka kitty cat]

neko-mata-01

well honestly that just seems utterly selfish on her part. how can she tell other people to care more about her than other people.
also whats this...
"Once the clock strikes midnight, from the 30th to the 31st, you and your friends will be subject to a lesson" what is she cursing you?....

i dont know, but so far, nothing has happened....  

[sandrock_buck]

I agree completely with Neko-Mata on this one, she's being completely selfish about this situation. Now, I'm no expert, I only took a semester of Psychology, but what I think is happening is that your friend sees your step-mother's tumor as a sort of wall that just popped up between you two. She can no longer use her illness as an excuse for attention from you. This sounds a little harsh, and your friend will more than likely deny this, but on a sub-conscious level, that's what it looks like. I understand that tumors are serious business, I myself lost an uncle to a tumor on his upper spine. But what your friend needs to understand is that it's your step-mother, and as the saying goes "Blood is thicker than water." She may not be a blood relative, but she is family, and that counts for a lot. So try and reason with your friend, try and make her see your side of this, if that doesn't work, you may just have to give up on this particular friend.  

[Flame Dashie]

yeah id have to say the same that is really rude to think that they should be more important than another  

[Shanna66]

wow that is selfish. i agree with Jonstalker62, it does sound like she wants to use her tumor as a way to get your attention.

she needs to grow up and not send you creepy threats. if i was in your postition i would ditch her, she doesnt seem like the kind of person worth having as a friend.  

[Arylon Lovire]

I agree almost on all points above me. She is selfish, and the fact that she raged at you for caring about a family member, is hideous. And in my own opinion, you should dump her.
However, if you DO care for this friend, i would suggest that you follow jonstalker's advice and opinion. Maybe when the issue with your step-mother has been concluded, you could buy her something simple as an apology gift, go to her place (If you know each other in person), and simply discuss what made her glass fall off the table and break into an unrepairable condition.  

[Gresley Toombs]

I agree with everything above except buying her an apology gift. It only confirms to her that she's getting your attention, and it acts like a reward for doing so.
Plus, what do you have to apologize for? Nothing, she's your stepmother.

Look back and see if this wasn't the only time she used her tumor for attention. She said 'friend' in her pm's, right? Does she not know it's your stepmother, and not another friend?
If I were you, I'd ditch her in life and report her for harassment here. I would honestly not care what happens to her. She obviously never really cared about you if she's blowing up at you for caring about your stepmother. She seemed to only care about the attention you gave her.

She feeds off the attention she gets; so starve her.  

[iamfelixC]

i must agree she is very selfish.i don't think she understands that you can care for more than one person.i honestly am confused about the situation myself but i am a little hopeful that something will happen in a good way.  

[PeachPunk]

I would probably cry until I couldn't breathe anymore if it were me to get those PMs... but anyway, that's not the point.
This story reminds me of something that happened to my parents when they were younger, before me and my siblings were born. My parents used to be pretty close to my dad's cousin and his wife back in the day. They went to the beach together and tried their best to be friendly. My dad even got his confirmation name from his cousin, who's about ten years older than him. But my parents always noticed that the cousins would try to one-up my parents. My mom would say, "Paul was busying painting the kitchen walls last weekend." And my cousin's wife would say, "Oh yeah? Well, Johnny painted the kitchen, livingroom, and bedroom walls this weekend, AND made 20 souflettes!" So yeah, at first my parents dealt with it, but one event just really struck a chord with them.
My mother's grandmother was on her deathbed, and around the same time, my dad's cousin's wife twisted her ankle; there was no major damage. As a result, my parents visisted Grammy a lot, because there wasn't a lot of time to do that anymore. Anyway, my dad's cousin said, "Hey, Paul! How come you didn't come over to visit Linda?" and my dad said, "Well, Johnny, Eileen's grandmother is dying..."
"Yeah, but Linda has a twisted ankle!"
(Anybody knows that dying > twisted ankle.)
It seems that your friend is doing something like what Cousin Johnny did. Using a little thing that's pretty mangable and turning it into something big just to get you to spend more time with them. Then once a bigger problem comes along, they get upset. Not saying having a tumor is "little" per se, but a benign tumor isn't as big a deal as a tumor on your colon. Try to explain to her that you still do care and are concerned about her tumor, but your stepmother's situation is more serious, So you'd like to try to deal with that first. If you just show your friend you care, things might work out. Just do it in small doses; ask her questions, like "How are you feeling?" or "Is your tumor looking any better?" or even "When is your next checkup on your tumor?" If you do those things, patching things up may come easily.  

[Shanna66]

Sunshine Peach-Heart

I would probably cry until I couldn't breathe anymore if it were me to get those PMs... but anyway, that's not the point.
This story reminds me of something that happened to my parents when they were younger, before me and my siblings were born. My parents used to be pretty close to my dad's cousin and his wife back in the day. They went to the beach together and tried their best to be friendly. My dad even got his confirmation name from his cousin, who's about ten years older than him. But my parents always noticed that the cousins would try to one-up my parents. My mom would say, "Paul was busying painting the kitchen walls last weekend." And my cousin's wife would say, "Oh yeah? Well, Johnny painted the kitchen, livingroom, and bedroom walls this weekend, AND made 20 souflettes!" So yeah, at first my parents dealt with it, but one event just really struck a chord with them.
My mother's grandmother was on her deathbed, and around the same time, my dad's cousin's wife twisted her ankle; there was no major damage. As a result, my parents visisted Grammy a lot, because there wasn't a lot of time to do that anymore. Anyway, my dad's cousin said, "Hey, Paul! How come you didn't come over to visit Linda?" and my dad said, "Well, Johnny, Eileen's grandmother is dying..."
"Yeah, but Linda has a twisted ankle!"
(Anybody knows that dying > twisted ankle.)
It seems that your friend is doing something like what Cousin Johnny did. Using a little thing that's pretty mangable and turning it into something big just to get you to spend more time with them. Then once a bigger problem comes along, they get upset. Not saying having a tumor is "little" per se, but a benign tumor isn't as big a deal as a tumor on your colon. Try to explain to her that you still do care and are concerned about her tumor, but your stepmother's situation is more serious, So you'd like to try to deal with that first. If you just show your friend you care, things might work out. Just do it in small doses; ask her questions, like "How are you feeling?" or "Is your tumor looking any better?" or even "When is your next checkup on your tumor?" If you do those things, patching things up may come easily.

that reminds me of a friend i used to have

when my mother died i didnt tell my friends or teachers, my dad called the school and told my teacher and my teacher talked to me about it in front of my entire class and then he told my other teachers who tols all my other classmates. well anyways then of course i had alot of my friends come up to me and tell me they were sorry, would buy me gifts, and just give me lots of attention. well after a couple weeks a "friend" of mine started predending her mother was dying and she kept that up for an entire week while people gfave her attention and then she said her mother just got better. her mother was fine and never even went to a doctor because nothing was wrong with her. that "friend" constantly goes out of her way to one up people so she can get attention.  

[PeachPunk]

Shanna66

Sunshine Peach-Heart

I would probably cry until I couldn't breathe anymore if it were me to get those PMs... but anyway, that's not the point.
This story reminds me of something that happened to my parents when they were younger, before me and my siblings were born. My parents used to be pretty close to my dad's cousin and his wife back in the day. They went to the beach together and tried their best to be friendly. My dad even got his confirmation name from his cousin, who's about ten years older than him. But my parents always noticed that the cousins would try to one-up my parents. My mom would say, "Paul was busying painting the kitchen walls last weekend." And my cousin's wife would say, "Oh yeah? Well, Johnny painted the kitchen, livingroom, and bedroom walls this weekend, AND made 20 souflettes!" So yeah, at first my parents dealt with it, but one event just really struck a chord with them.
My mother's grandmother was on her deathbed, and around the same time, my dad's cousin's wife twisted her ankle; there was no major damage. As a result, my parents visisted Grammy a lot, because there wasn't a lot of time to do that anymore. Anyway, my dad's cousin said, "Hey, Paul! How come you didn't come over to visit Linda?" and my dad said, "Well, Johnny, Eileen's grandmother is dying..."
"Yeah, but Linda has a twisted ankle!"
(Anybody knows that dying > twisted ankle.)
It seems that your friend is doing something like what Cousin Johnny did. Using a little thing that's pretty mangable and turning it into something big just to get you to spend more time with them. Then once a bigger problem comes along, they get upset. Not saying having a tumor is "little" per se, but a benign tumor isn't as big a deal as a tumor on your colon. Try to explain to her that you still do care and are concerned about her tumor, but your stepmother's situation is more serious, So you'd like to try to deal with that first. If you just show your friend you care, things might work out. Just do it in small doses; ask her questions, like "How are you feeling?" or "Is your tumor looking any better?" or even "When is your next checkup on your tumor?" If you do those things, patching things up may come easily.

that reminds me of a friend i used to have

when my mother died i didnt tell my friends or teachers, my dad called the school and told my teacher and my teacher talked to me about it in front of my entire class and then he told my other teachers who tols all my other classmates. well anyways then of course i had alot of my friends come up to me and tell me they were sorry, would buy me gifts, and just give me lots of attention. well after a couple weeks a "friend" of mine started predending her mother was dying and she kept that up for an entire week while people gfave her attention and then she said her mother just got better. her mother was fine and never even went to a doctor because nothing was wrong with her. that "friend" constantly goes out of her way to one up people so she can get attention.

Wow, I would hate to be the mother in that situation. I'm surprised one of the mom's friends didn't get word of this and call her and say, "Oh Petunia, I heard you were deathly ill in the hospital" and then she would have been like "WHAT??!?!"
How old was this friend when she did this? It sounds like a pretty juvenile thing to do to me.  

[Shanna66]

Sunshine Peach-Heart

Shanna66

Sunshine Peach-Heart

I would probably cry until I couldn't breathe anymore if it were me to get those PMs... but anyway, that's not the point.
This story reminds me of something that happened to my parents when they were younger, before me and my siblings were born. My parents used to be pretty close to my dad's cousin and his wife back in the day. They went to the beach together and tried their best to be friendly. My dad even got his confirmation name from his cousin, who's about ten years older than him. But my parents always noticed that the cousins would try to one-up my parents. My mom would say, "Paul was busying painting the kitchen walls last weekend." And my cousin's wife would say, "Oh yeah? Well, Johnny painted the kitchen, livingroom, and bedroom walls this weekend, AND made 20 souflettes!" So yeah, at first my parents dealt with it, but one event just really struck a chord with them.
My mother's grandmother was on her deathbed, and around the same time, my dad's cousin's wife twisted her ankle; there was no major damage. As a result, my parents visisted Grammy a lot, because there wasn't a lot of time to do that anymore. Anyway, my dad's cousin said, "Hey, Paul! How come you didn't come over to visit Linda?" and my dad said, "Well, Johnny, Eileen's grandmother is dying..."
"Yeah, but Linda has a twisted ankle!"
(Anybody knows that dying > twisted ankle.)
It seems that your friend is doing something like what Cousin Johnny did. Using a little thing that's pretty mangable and turning it into something big just to get you to spend more time with them. Then once a bigger problem comes along, they get upset. Not saying having a tumor is "little" per se, but a benign tumor isn't as big a deal as a tumor on your colon. Try to explain to her that you still do care and are concerned about her tumor, but your stepmother's situation is more serious, So you'd like to try to deal with that first. If you just show your friend you care, things might work out. Just do it in small doses; ask her questions, like "How are you feeling?" or "Is your tumor looking any better?" or even "When is your next checkup on your tumor?" If you do those things, patching things up may come easily.

that reminds me of a friend i used to have

when my mother died i didnt tell my friends or teachers, my dad called the school and told my teacher and my teacher talked to me about it in front of my entire class and then he told my other teachers who tols all my other classmates. well anyways then of course i had alot of my friends come up to me and tell me they were sorry, would buy me gifts, and just give me lots of attention. well after a couple weeks a "friend" of mine started predending her mother was dying and she kept that up for an entire week while people gfave her attention and then she said her mother just got better. her mother was fine and never even went to a doctor because nothing was wrong with her. that "friend" constantly goes out of her way to one up people so she can get attention.

Wow, I would hate to be the mother in that situation. I'm surprised one of the mom's friends didn't get word of this and call her and say, "Oh Petunia, I heard you were deathly ill in the hospital" and then she would have been like "WHAT??!?!"
How old was this friend when she did this? It sounds like a pretty juvenile thing to do to me.

we were all 15 at the time. she still does things like that though even though we are in our 20s though now its always about/with men.

and i have another friend who seems to want to turn our risk of having cancer into some kind of contest. ive completly broken off contact with this woman because of how insensative she was getting.