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My dad won't let me wear plaid?

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PostPosted: Wed Jun 13, 2012 5:49 pm
Aaaaaaye I think that rhymed. Heheheheh.

Anyway, I have a little bit of a problem. I think my dad's starting to catch on to the fact that I'm gay. I mean, he's usually really accepting and cool about everything else, but the second my sexuality comes up he kind of freaks out. He doesn't want me cutting my hair a certain way or wearing certain things because he says it's ' gay '. He even goes on long winded rants about how I'm not a lesbian and I'll never be a lesbian. Now, I'm not so sure about ever coming out to him. I want to, but I'm afraid of how he'll react. Does anybody have any advice?
 
PostPosted: Wed Jun 13, 2012 6:18 pm
You could try and tell him you're going throuh a rough patch and you need his support.  

Esiris

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PostPosted: Thu Jun 14, 2012 4:03 pm
To be fair to your dad, plaid is an ugly pattern. I mean, it looks like various flags threw up and then someone put that flag-vomit on clothing and other cloth items.

But yeah, it sucks that your dad feels that way. It would probably be best if you waited until you got a place of your own to tell him. That way if he does flip out and possibly disowns you (though I think I speak for the whole guild when I say I hope he doesn't), you won't be homeless.
Until then, if you don't already have your own place, you might just want to do things to help him realize when you do come out that you aren't any different than anyone else and that it's not going to be weird for him simply because you're gay.  
PostPosted: Thu Jun 14, 2012 5:40 pm
My mum was the exact same. i came out to her and she was pissed. then acted like it never happened for a year. tried again, and she was totally okay with it.

if he's usually accepting, he'll probably be okay with eventually. the initial coming out might turn out badly, but i think he'll come around.  

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loonaboots

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PostPosted: Thu Jun 14, 2012 6:12 pm
Well, if it's the coming out part that you want help with, I'd say come out when you think you should. If your mom is more accepting of things like sexual orientations, I'd think about coming out to her first. If your dad is, then I'd maybe wait until he calms down.

As for the "gay" comments, maybe you could call him out on his behavior- like next time he mentions something is "gay," casually say something like "that's homophobic, dad," and move on.

And as for the hair cuts, clothes, etc. I'd just tell him that it's my body, and I'll wear what I want, cut my hair how I want, etc. At the end of the day, there's really no way to act "gay," too, so you could maybe point that out. :/

Anyways, that's just something I'd try. and it'd backfire. horribly.

Also- your avatar is ADORABLE.
 
PostPosted: Thu Jun 14, 2012 6:58 pm
So, wait... plaid is gay now? lol That is silly.

Maybe if you leave it alone for a while and approach him about it later, he'll be okay with it? Like, maybe after you move out? I don't know, I've never been in your situation, but I just wish I could help. ^_^  

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PostPosted: Thu Jun 14, 2012 8:23 pm
Would that mean everyone who is Scottish gay now? Cause we have tartans that are plaid (well some of my mom's family does anyways). sweatdrop

I agree with others, wait and before telling me and maybe just correct them when they say something like "that's so gay", etc....that's what I do with my family.  
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