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 Posted: Mon Jul 09, 2012 11:46 am
First time, big deal or not?
It's been taking over my mind lately and everytime I even consider
it, my heart races. Any tips? Candles... Yes No? emotion_0A0
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Posted: Mon Jul 09, 2012 12:28 pm
o0Roxy0o
First time, big deal or not?
It's been taking over my mind lately and everytime I even consider
it, my heart races. Any tips? Candles... Yes No? emotion_0A0
Easy there! Breathe! Seriously now... a girl doesn't always come the first time (it's SO much easier for men to have orgasms it's not even funny) so don't go in expecting the earth to move and fireworks to go off. Since yours seems to be a planned thing (unlike mine) why yes, by all means candles. Just make sure they're far enough from you that you won't knock one over when passion takes over xd My very first time was... well, I guess you could call it confusing and kind of problematic as well as totally unplanned and not my idea. My first time with the someone I'm with now was unplanned to... but it felt right. I guess that's the answer I was looking for to give you. It has to feel right. Completely, totally right, even if you can't imagine yourself with that person forever and ever. emotion_hug Good luck!
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THE_FAIRY_EMPRESS Vice Captain
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Posted: Mon Jul 09, 2012 12:35 pm
to be honest i never cared about my first time, but everyones different. I dunno why i never cared about it, it just didn't seem like a big deal, I knew it wasn't going to be good, and thought it was kind o in the way of getting on to the good sex 4laugh
It's a totally personal thing but i wouldn't stress about it heart
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Posted: Mon Jul 09, 2012 12:40 pm
 My first time wasn't by choice, however the second time was amazing. Just be sure that you are being safe. Candles wouldn't be a great idea just because you could knock the over or you might forget about them and fall asleep afterwards, they do have electronic candles which are perfectly safe and they run off batteries, no flames. You could use those instead. :]
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Posted: Mon Jul 09, 2012 12:52 pm
I think it's a big deal.. x3
BUT you HAVE TO be safe xP
Candles COULD work, but you could knock one over x3
Make sure it's someone you actually like and could spend the rest of your life with. OH excuse me I meant, LOVE*.
Don't worry, but the first one isn't always the best. The second or third one is best.. ^^
Good luck~! heart
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Posted: Mon Jul 09, 2012 1:14 pm
Now that we've all lectured you on fire safety cat_burning_eyes cat_rofl it's time to talk about the biggest safety risk of all.
That's right, girls! Unprotected sex! We all know why it's a bad idea, right?
Aside from the risk of pregnancy, which is very real, even a guy who thinks he's clean might be carrying something that might not be deadly but can still be unpleasant. Think HPV or chlamydia.
I finally told my parents what was going on because I had a yeast infection and was certain I had something horrible. Easily treated, but still extremely unpleasant to deal with...
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Posted: Tue Jul 10, 2012 2:17 pm
Honestly, if you spend all this time putting out candles and making it all romantic and stuff, chances are you're probably going to get too nervous and chicken out.
Or maybe not, but definitely consider that.
WHen you just let it happen, is when it's the best. With my husband, we kind of just knew it was going to happen, but when it finally did after talking about it for a couple of weeks, ugh it was perfect.
Honestly, I just suggest music.
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Posted: Tue Jul 10, 2012 2:21 pm
I think it's a big deal.
But worrying yourself over it that you explode? A bigger deal.
Like so many girls are going to say, if your ready, go for it.
Just make sure you are safe. c:
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Posted: Wed Jul 11, 2012 1:21 pm
I didn't/don't think it is a big deal. Not saying it doesn't matter, but I am saying in hindsight the whole thing seems so much less important than it seemed before I had done it.
It is a big deal in the sense it is a once in a lifetime experience and also it is the first time you experience complete intimacy with someone. It's something that requires a lot of responsibility and care.
However, it is not a big deal as in: it doesn't need to be perfect. Sometimes things can be awkward, or go wrong, or just not work out the way you wanted them to be. But remember that it's just your FIRST time, and many more to come can go a lot better and smoother!
So all in all, try to relax and enjoy the moment, don't expect incredible things out of it aside from being able to share more with the person you care about and just pick a setting that suits you emotion_c8
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Posted: Mon Jul 16, 2012 5:16 pm
I've always felt that it's a big deal, because I'd always intended to only have one sex partner my whole life. For me, losing my virginity was the biggest act of trust and love I could ever perform, and I made sure my partner (now my fiance) knew how important it was to me. It wasn't exactly planned, but it was perfect. If you can plan it, go ahead. I've always prefered spontaneous sex because it seems more raw and pure, but what matters is what it means to you.
My fiance's first time wasn't at all important to him and I know he came to regret it, but in the end all that matters is how you feel about each other, whether you are or were a virgin.
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Posted: Mon Jul 16, 2012 6:03 pm
i think it depends on the person. i've talked to some friends that have had sex and they say they wish they'd have waited longer, others were perfectly fine with when they did it their first time and continue to have sex in relationships. personally i have trust issues and have had a history of people i care about a lot suddenly leaving me or hurting me, so for my own mental safety i'm waiting, but that doesn't mean everyone is that way. just don't rush into it, there's absolutely nothing wrong with taking your time and only going the whole way once you're comfortable with it. if it's making your heart race and you worry or get nervous about it now then just keep waiting. you'll get to the point where you're comfortable with the idea with someone at your own pace, just remember to breathe and don't rush it because you don't have to
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Posted: Mon Jul 16, 2012 6:31 pm
 ♥ síℓεntƒαиtαsíεs ♥
Sex being a big deal depends on the person.
Whether it's planned or unplanned changes things too.
Basically, you need to do whatever makes you feel comfortable.
If you want candles, add candles in a safe spot far-far from the area you'll be in.
I like music and usually we used that (since my family was always awake)
and it can be a pretty good mood setter depending on the song.
Oh and try not to laugh at mishaps or other things that may go awry/awkward...
I do that sometimes and it can be a mood killer.
And women have a harder time gettin off then men do.
I've never finished and the only times I came close we had to stop and
let me cool off since we were in the next room over from my mom and didn't wanna wake her.
My best friend just finishes herself after so if you're comfortable enough you could do that if you don't.
For me, my best friend and I bet sex on a game of minigolf.
(it's a long story so I won't get into that unless asked sweatdrop it actually cracks me up to think about it
and my boyfriend doesn't even really remember since I'm not his first).
To sum it up: There had been some sexual tension between us for over a year
and the results were gonna be sex either way.
So we planned a when it would be not too long after that.
We needed to set boundaries and make sure we were both okay with it.
We actually become a couple a few months after the first time
because it was a friend w/ benefits kinda deal (i wouldn't compare it to the movie since I haven't seen it. We set up boundaries like we couldn't sleep with anyone else of the opposite sex but we could flirt and such with whoever we wanted.)
We planned a monthly weekend visits since I had moved just before our first time together.
Although the first was planned, things don't always go as you expected to be razz
We've been together as a legit couple for 2yrs 9 months so no judging though kay? xd
And most importantly. Remember to play safe.
Make sure it is someone you care for deeply and make sure they care for you too.
You don't want to end up regretting it.
Personally I was a) going to save myself for marriage or b) break that for my best friend.
I cared deeply for my best friend and although he didn't have the same
feelings for me at first (we only hooked up because he didn't like that I was flirting with other people and such. Basically, he wanted me to himself but didn't want to commit because he still liked other people).
I don't regret my decision at all and we've had a nice past and plan for an even better future.
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Posted: Wed Aug 22, 2012 9:26 pm
Gigi Deveraux o0Roxy0o
First time, big deal or not?
It's been taking over my mind lately and everytime I even consider
it, my heart races. Any tips? Candles... Yes No? emotion_0A0
Easy there! Breathe! Seriously now... a girl doesn't always come the first time (it's SO much easier for men to have orgasms it's not even funny) so don't go in expecting the earth to move and fireworks to go off. Since yours seems to be a planned thing (unlike mine) why yes, by all means candles. Just make sure they're far enough from you that you won't knock one over when passion takes over xd My very first time was... well, I guess you could call it confusing and kind of problematic as well as totally unplanned and not my idea. My first time with the someone I'm with now was unplanned to... but it felt right. I guess that's the answer I was looking for to give you. It has to feel right. Completely, totally right, even if you can't imagine yourself with that person forever and ever. emotion_hug Good luck! Yeah what she said. I wish I had this advice when I first did it.
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