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Posted: Sat Jun 28, 2014 8:19 pm
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So, you know how you will feel one way but you're not sure why you feel that way so you think about why you would be feeling that way, so you have know idea what you're really feeling?
Well; I was visiting my friends who live 2 hours away and i met a guy. We've been on dates and hes super nice, has a brilliant future and could probably give me anything I desire. I've only known him for about a month. He's also going to a college a state away (not worried about trust)
In the past, I'm used to jumping into things so I'm not sure how getting to know someone really feels like.
So, I question what I'm feeling and thinking. When we're together, it's fun. He's the ideal boyfriend for anyone to be honest. He really likes me.
But; I like him too but I'm not sure if it's as much as he likes me. I might just be THINKING that I'm feeling that I shouldn't date him so soon because he's going to college and getting to know a person in a matter of 1-2 months to me, i feel like you should know how much you like them. My brain is telling me; don't mess it up, keep him around because he would be good for your future.
Then there's this; I've been able to kiss 2 guys without really thinking about it hardcore. Things like that. That makes me a bad person sort of but I think it's showing me that maybe I don't like him enough to date him yet, right? Or am I just thinking that I feel I shouldn't date him because of what I'm doing? I don't want to regret anything if I break it off. But if i would regret it, would i even be thinking about it?
Please help me evaluate what my head and my heart are saying.
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Posted: Sat Jun 28, 2014 11:40 pm
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Posted: Sun Jun 29, 2014 1:32 am
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Posted: Sun Jun 29, 2014 2:00 pm
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Posted: Sun Jun 29, 2014 4:07 pm
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I'd say take a chance and go for it. You're young (at least if you're dating someone who's going to college I think you are) and you have so much time to figure stuff out later. Now is not the time to worry about where this relationship might end up, just think about how it makes you feel in the moment. I understand how frustrating it can be to overanalyze stuff, though. It's scary and makes you anxious, and it sucks. But ultimately what's the worst that can happen? Think about that. The worst is that this relationship doesn't work out, you both move on, and find new relationships that work better. The best case scenario is that the relationship does work out. Either option ends with happiness, life experience, and a furthering in your path through life. Sounds like a good deal. Only known him a month? The longer you know him the longer you've known him, that's the good news. Going to college a state away? Cars, trains, planes, buses, phones, computers, Skype, there are ways around that. If you think you like him more than he likes you remember that he does like you. Time will balance you two out in the liking levels. You can't worry about regretting something that hasn't happened yet, also. Don't worry about those things. I know that's hard, I know it's not going to stop you from worrying, but maybe worry about something more relevant like what times you can talk to him and when the next holiday you can get together over is. Things like that.
I also want to address something you said: Uncomfortable Moan Then there's this; I've been able to kiss 2 guys without really thinking about it hardcore. Things like that. That makes me a bad person sort of . No it doesn't. Nope. No it does not. Kissing someone is not always a meaningful act. Everyone has different opinions on this, though. I feel comfortable "casually" kissing someone (kissing someone I don't have feelings for, or someone I'm not intending to have a relationship with, etc.). Kissing, for me, is not an inherently romantic, sexual, important, or significant action. I don't tie it to fluttery feelings or my heart. Other people do, though, which is something I acknowledge. So, maybe if those two guys you kissed felt the kisses were important, that might be something to know. If you feel like you agree more with what I think/feel, then you might need to keep that in mind. I've dated people in the past who didn't want to kiss for a long time because they thought kissing was important and special and wanted to wait until our relationship was stronger. I respected the fact that they felt this way. If you don't need to think long and hard about kissing, but someone you date does then you just have to respect their preferences and understand if they want to wait on the kissing. But you're not a bad person for being able to kiss people without feeling anything. That's not bad. It's not even abnormal. It's just how you feel and think and that's okay.
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Posted: Sun Jun 29, 2014 6:26 pm
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Posted: Mon Jun 30, 2014 7:50 am
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Posted: Mon Jun 30, 2014 12:22 pm
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Posted: Wed Aug 20, 2014 1:29 am
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Posted: Sat Aug 23, 2014 2:39 pm
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