♥ okay starting September 5th I am starting my senior year of high school
I can't help but be depressed about it...cause after high school I won't see the people I have seen every year 5 days a week for 9 months a year...
and today I was on the phone with my friend and we were talking and I was sad because he couldn't come over, and he was like don't worry, you have 9 more months to see me, cause he is leaving right after we graduate, and he was like "then I will leave, and you will go off to college, find a better guy, fall in love with him, and get married, and have children and be happy" now what sucked about him telling me this is I am in love with him, and I seriously started crying....and what could suck was that he could tell that I was...and he kept asking what was wrong...but I didn't want to tell him, I mean he knows I love him, and he loves me too, but the thing is we can't date because his ex is gonna have his child soon and a bunch of other things...and it sucks...so I didn't want to tell him on the phone "I am really depressed because I won't have a chance to actually go out with you before school is over...and before you leave...and I want more than anything to be with you...even if it's just for a little bit..." so yeah...pretty much I need some way to get out of this senior year depression...because it sucks...a lot... ♥
I can't help but be depressed about it...cause after high school I won't see the people I have seen every year 5 days a week for 9 months a year...
and today I was on the phone with my friend and we were talking and I was sad because he couldn't come over, and he was like don't worry, you have 9 more months to see me, cause he is leaving right after we graduate, and he was like "then I will leave, and you will go off to college, find a better guy, fall in love with him, and get married, and have children and be happy" now what sucked about him telling me this is I am in love with him, and I seriously started crying....and what could suck was that he could tell that I was...and he kept asking what was wrong...but I didn't want to tell him, I mean he knows I love him, and he loves me too, but the thing is we can't date because his ex is gonna have his child soon and a bunch of other things...and it sucks...so I didn't want to tell him on the phone "I am really depressed because I won't have a chance to actually go out with you before school is over...and before you leave...and I want more than anything to be with you...even if it's just for a little bit..." so yeah...pretty much I need some way to get out of this senior year depression...because it sucks...a lot... ♥
- edit -
well yeah this guy that this was about, we were talking the other day and I mentioned something about how I wish I could be his girlfriend and how I wish we could be together, and he said don't worry, we will be sooner than you think, 2 days before that happened he gave me a necklace and a ring...
and then yesterday when we were talking, (he's going to college in Indiana, we live in Michigan) and he asked me if I would come visit him on weekends and stay the night with him, I said sure, but you're gonna end up finding someone else when you're away from me for so long, and he said no and he wouldn't want to, and that he loves me...
but I am still kind of sad because I can't be 100% sure on what he tells me...