My best friend and I need help!! T_T

[DvnT]

ok, is starts out, i get a little depressed. ok? just fine, everythings normal. then my friend starts to get depressed. not just a little, but , like sui'y notes depressed. and thats not normal.. so we have a sleep over to talk about everything, and i end up telling her i might be bi...(wich i dont really like...grr@me) so last night she tells me she is bi... so i ask her who? like a good friend (like she did to me! i told her(cuz it was her...)) and she says she doesn't know. i don't get it, its like, i tell her something, but its always worse for her...... no matter what, its worse. can someone help me please!?!?!?! she wont quit copying everything that happens to me! my dad is an alchoholic and then hers turns to alchol, i only get to see my dad maybe 2 times a year, and she *says* that she only gets to see her dad maybe 2 times in five years(but she does go up to her dads like, 6 times a year....) can someone please explain!?!?!?!?! confused confused confused  

[Calypsophia]

being bi doesnt mean liking someone in particular. it means liking people of both sexes in general.

also, when I was a kid I had the same problem your friend has. I copied and tried to be like my best friend. she was prettier, smarter, and I was ugly and average and I thought if I had the same things she had, did the same things she did, I'd be better. it's an insecurity thing.

but no matter what, people always think their problem is worse when they have it than when someone else has the same problem. somehow, it's not as bad when it's someone elses feelings, but when it's your own it's the worst thing in the world. that's because people are generally self-obsessed. our own problems and feelings are more 'real' than other peoples. and that's with just about everyone.  

[Guardian1239]

Perhaps she's not copying you. Maybe it just seems like it question . If she is copying you, she's already being punished. I mean, she's becoming depressed just to copy you. That's a little strange. Eventually she'll get tired of it . . . hopefully.  

[Lunar_Sunset]

Maybe she insecure either tat u wont be her friend if she is not alot like u or she doesnt know who she really is so she is trying to be someone else the only other thing i can think is tat she wants to impress you!!!  

[Nariko914]

She has a serious need for attention. She is being competitive because she is jealous of you, and she wants attention, as I said.

I think you should talk to her and tell her that there is no reason for her to compete with you like that. Explain to her that your problems are your problems and that she doesn't need to try to "top" them - it won't do her any good. If she can't comply with this, she's not a very good friend. She wants attention from you, and is not a good enough friend to give you the help you need. She only wants to receive attention, not give it.  

[TashiaGirl]

It sounds like she is copying you. I mean, like, friends sometimes do this, as in act like you, but her act is alittle over the top. Do you still like her? Is she still acting the same as when you befriended her? If she is the kind of person who will be ok with you asking are you copying me? ask her. If not, I would copy her. This will show her how you feel about her copying. This is a problem that faces usauly a few times or once in every friendship. Oh and about her being depressed: maybe she was depressed because you were. As in maybe she just wanted her friend back. I think she may be jelous of one of your other friends. When a friend thinks you are getting rid of them for someone else, they usauly become clingy in their own ways. Maybe her way is to try and be like you. Have you made any new friends recently or done anything recently that may make her think you are going to get another best friend and drift apart from her? Good luck
TashiaGirl  

[DvnT]

i sent her a note last friday asking her why she's copying people (its now moved on to other people, like everyone pierced theyre bellie button and she did it too.) and she wont talk to me now.

to answer tashie girl, no i havent made any friends since last year. i'm just hangingout with more people, normaly just other friends of hers....

i dont know. i think everything i'm doing is just pushing her away. i told her i dont want to lose her, and that i'm scared for her, and now she wont talk to me. she's avoiding me, and she wont be in the same room with me without at least two other people and i dont want to embarrass her by asking in front of others. and now everyone is supporting her exept me, brit., and sammy. and the only reason they dont support her is cuz they had tried to commit sui'y' at points a while back (she had copied them and now she has to see the counciler thats not making anything better, cuz somehow the counciler has got it into her head that i'm not good...and she should trust her parents.(her parents are alcholics and her stepdad litterally hates her and just wants her mom for sex))

long post....

thanks all those who are helping me... heart  

[TashiaGirl]

Hearing her side of the story... Maybe this troubled family life is efecting her to do things she wouldn't normaly do. If it's not her being clingy, I don't know. So its not just you... Maybe she feels she isn't popalur enough and needs to make more friends. Does she have a lot of friends? If she won't talk to you *clears throat and reads from friendship book* it says that you should try and rebuild your friendship, as in ask her whats wrong, get her alone sometime in the hall. Call her. This family life of hers seems complicated. Talk. Maybe there is more to it then meets the eye. Good luck.
TashiaGirl  

[kyoshiro2]

Sorry but your "friend" sounds like a tard.... She needs to get sorted out... Why would a counciler say you were "not good" because the counciler asks questions meaning she has said something for the counciler to think that... And the rest of the stupid tards that are supporting her just because she attempted to commit "sui'y" as you put it just like them... Life is s**t it's just something you got to live with... It's a load of crap... Why copy something as stupid as suicide... If shedoesn't want to talk to you the better... Let her go screw her life up by herself... Don't think it's your fault or anything because she's the one doing it herself.... She the only one she can blame when it all goes wrong....  

[Calypsophia]

she (your friend) seems to be one who will go with whatever is the 'in' or 'popular' thing to be at the time. which means, if she doesnt find and accept who or what she really is, she's going eventually to be a very lonely person.  

[DvnT]

thanks for all your help every one, you really helped. i talked to her (well sent her a note because she won't talk to me). i also talked to one of my other friends who know her. my bff now doesnt want to everspeak to me again and the other friend i mentioned says we should be best friends, but i think that i shouldn't do that because it feels wrong. oh well. thanks again for all your help.

-dvn  

[TashiaGirl]

You know, it's ok to have more then bf. But still, it does seem wrong. Well so your friend won't talk to you? OK I say that you try and make a move. Call her ok? I think maybe you should invite her somewhere (I am getting all this from a friendship book hehe... sweatdrop ) well um invite her somewhere. Just try and talk to her. Don't talk about becoming best friend with the other friend you were talking about before ok? Just kind of hang there for awhile!! *puts up 2 thumbs*  

[Guardian1239]

I think it's best to just let her calm down. Find another group or other friends for a while. Eventually, she will start to miss you if she really cares about you. It's pointless trying to to communicate with her while she has support from others because she'll have "evidence" that you're a bad person.  

[DvnT]

thanks again for all those who helped. i think i'm going with things some of you suggested: leave her. i got one of my other friends to tell her why i got upset with her in the first place. and im not sure how shell take it so im just going to do what i always do, minus her. it, hurts, almost, to do this. like im cutting out part of myself. its hard to explain but it feels like im missing half of me. like i cut myself in half and she took one part of me with her... ugh. this is rough.

thanks again. i hope this works

~love heart
-dvn