My Ex-BFFL is trying to ruin my life

[Bitter Aphrodisiac]

Okay, so I used to be best frinds in the world with this girl names Rebecca. We were both goth and focused on darkness and evil and witchcraft and stuff, because we thought it was cool. We would do everything together, eat together at lunch, sing together in chorus, help eachother out with projects for our evil Geography teacher Mrs. Beckles.

We would tell eachother everything, we even let eachother read the other's diary, to a certain extent. We were also BFFLs with my bestfriend ever Mary, who was just like us.

Me and Mary wouldn't stop annoying eachother about reading eachother's old diaries, taunting eachother. Becca would always yell at us for it, you could tell who was the Alpha out of us three.

So, one day I finally cracked and told her why I didn't want her to read it, My example was, "Because it's worse than anything Becca has ever done!!" Mary just stared at me, and she knew it had something to do with a boy. We were waiting outside our science class when Becca walked up. Randomly, Mary shouts: "I KNOW WHY LEA DOESN'T WANT US TO READ HER DIARY!!!" This automatically spawns the question from Becca, "Why?"

Mary looks at me, and I sigh, defeated. "Because it's worse than anything that you've ever done." I said, holding my books tighter and looking down. Her eyes go wide and she gets a really angry expression on her face. "You mean you've cheated on a boy?!!" She screams/whispers at me. I nod my head reluctantly, guilt choking my heart. Then the storm hits.

Becca starts yelling at me. "YOU DO NOT DO THAT!!!!!!!!! I'VE NEVER DONE IT, YOU NEVER EVER EVER DO THAT!!!!!!! IT MAKES THE OTHER PERSON FEEL LIKE s**t!!!!!" Then the lightning strikes. She raises her hand up and smacks my shoulder like a sledgehammer hitting a nail intill it bends in half. Once. Twice. Three times she hit me. I shied away, then walked into the classroom, rubbing my shoulder. I didn't talk to her the rest of the day.

She didn't get it that I had felt totally and completely guilty about what I had done the boy I had been dating. I felt so guilty that as soon as I did it I ran up to him and started crying and apologizing and told him what happened. I couldn't live with the guilt. He told me that it was okay, he's a very understanding person, and said that he was glad that I hadn't lied to him and told him the truth.

But, of course, Becca didn't know that all this had happened. All she knew was that I cheated on my Ex once and decided it was enough of a cause to hit me. I became her friend again after that and she never hit me, but she came close. Although she stopped hitting me, she didn't stop hitting Mary. She said she had a right to. Then, in language arts one day, we had and IFC that told us to write down one of the most terrible things that anyone has ever done to you.

I wrote about what Becca had done. It spawned this whole discussion and the teacher told me that I had to get away from her. She said thay if I kept this up, that I would pick a guy that needs help with issues and eventually get into an abusive relationship and not get out. I knew she was probably right.

So, that day I started to hang out with my other friends more than Becca. Eventually we stopped talking and Mary confronted her about not wanting to be her friend and that was that. From then on she's tried to make my life a living hell. She's tried to turn my friends Mary and Caitlyn against me, which she hasn't succeeded in so far. She's succeeded in turning some of my other friends against me, and has even lied to my sister about my friend Maria hating me (Maria is also Becca's BFFL) even though she didn't so I would stay away from her. She's thrown hard hats at me in drama and I almost cried because the people who I thought were my friends were laughing at me with her.

I've been doing really good at avoiding her and ignoring her, but last night it went over the edge. I had a dream where she tried to kill me last night. Mary read my dream (I wrote it down) and said she was scared by it. Then Becca wasn't in school today, thank god. I don't know what to do anymore. It's getting to confusing and hard and my mom won't let me switch schools because it's, "Just-A-Friend-Problm-That-Will-Go-Away" supposedly, but I know it won't. I need advice. I'm Sorry that this post is so long, but can you please help? I don't know what to do anymore.  

[Super Green Jelly Bean]

welp im not a fan of goths or anything but i think that i would just kill her lolz! no but really if avoiding her does not work then there isnt much else to do besides tellin somone like a teacher or ur parents or somone whats going on and see if the can help the situation by keepin her away from you. or you can always go up to her and ask her y shes bein the way she is and try to solve the problem that way but this way you dont have to worry bout it but you also dont have to talk to her! if you know what i mean exclaim question exclaim question  

[akira-otomo]

Warning: Extreme Language is used in this post, don't read if you might be offended or shocked ...

Excuse my French, but ******** them all! It has never happened to me a majorly as it has to you, but an old friend is trying to ruin my life too. I just ignore him and swear at him alot, Iknow it's wrong, but it's gotten to a point where he just pisses me off so much that I practically turn arund and punch him. I've known him since September 2007, and already he's making me want to leave my school because he's being such an a*****e to me, I go to school and all I get's crap everyday, it's s**t. If I were you, I'd do whatI usually do, insult him 'till the cows come home: he's a b***h tome, so I'm a b***h to him.
But I just suggest you stay away from them, they're gits, face it, and don't encourage them.  

[Anabethe]

This is where what i learn in psychology comes in handy. your ex friend is borderline. she's one of those people that gets attached to someone so much. and if they feel threatened about their friendship in any way they will try to sabotage you. theres also one more thing. she could be dangerous. and yes this is where i bring my religion in. you better be careful she might try to put some witchcraft on you and from my experiences a lot of them work. some could even kill you..the best advice i could give you is to tell a teacher about what's going on. make sure that an adult knows what's going on. and never be alone with her. explain to your friends the situation and if they believe her over you they are not really your friends. but you have to really be careful with her. and avoid talking to her. try not to fist fight because if you do you will get introuble regardless if you were right or not.  

[Majix The Ninja]

Quit your bitching...just whip the s**t out of her.
Just be like, "b***h! You best be respectin' my pimp hand. HO!"

That should solve everything.EVER  

[btrfly7]

I agree with meleny. Talk to your friends and explain what she's up to. As for the abuse at school, someone needs to be told (counselor or even the principal). I hope things get better for you sweetie, good luck and show her that you're not scared of her (even if you are).  

[OMG-JuliaJean]

Ignore her! and don't encourage losers like her! just remember that you don't need her and look for comfort your REAL friends!

 

[Rikki-Lee Burlison]

you know...I have the same problem too.
my ex best friend even hacked all the sites I was logged into, even my msn and deleted AND blocked all my friends.
then also, she is telling my other friends lies and bad things about me so they´d turn me down as well.

the importaints thing is to go to a teacher, parents and other best friends. tell them about your problem and don´t ignore it, or just try to solve it.
you must do something about it, but the importaints thing is, if she does do something bad to you, don´t take revenge, that´d just make it worse.

good luck though, and I hope you´ll get it fixed soon!!
smile  

[Cannibal- a n n i b a l]

Hey I know exactly what you mean,
I had a friend that lied to me day in, day out.
I called her out on it, and she just kept going. It got to the point where i could not stand her company anymore. It seemed all she did, was lie, and act like a whore.
And i'm not kidding aroudn when say 'whore'.
She was dating 3 people at once.
It got to the point where attending school was absolutely horrid for me.
I just didn't want to deal with her.
She got extremely mad when i called her out a second time, and basically ripped her apart verbally.
She stopepd speakign with me breifly and talked smack behind my back, it drove me insane. Especially when she had taken along my few otehr friends with her, leaving me to fair for myself.
Eventually time passed and i started to hang out with different people.
I found a small group of friends that i still lvoe to this day
:]
She still continues to talk smack about me sometimes.
And she's friensd with my boyfriend.
But i'm never too worried and i do my best to kill her with kindness.
It best to just toughen up a a bit. Fight back.
Then again i guess that's coming froma bit of a diliquent...
To be quite honest i'd be the one to sock her in the face for hitting me with hard hats.
But that's me.
^^;

Just don't be afraid to stand up for yourself!
She has no control over you!
So just stick with your true friends, ok?

 

[TickleMeBreathless]

Man, that sucks. I'm sorry you have to go through that.

You need to seriously stay away from her. If she begins to go any farther, take it to an adult. Hitting is NOT okay, friends or not. Besides, if she showed violent tendancies before, they may come out again in a fit of anger.

If your true friends know about the whole situation, then you need to trust that they trust you. They won't believe her lies; But as for her herself, if she keeps throwing hard-hats at you, stand up for yourself. Don't let anyone get away with that.

*hug* Hope things work out!  

[ITADAKIMASU NOM NOM]

Ah, the old "Friend-Turns-Against-You" situation. I've had to deal with this before. Last year, I had a friend who talked smack behind my back. I didn't know, but one day in Gym, I caught her in the act, and SCREAMED AS LOUD AS I COULD MUSTER at her for saying things like that behind my back. She didn't talk to me for the rest of the week, but on Friday when it was time to go home and people were getting their bags, she was showing a paper around to the kids who got their stuff. Some laughed, some gasped, some were indifferent. I was oblivious to what was so funny/shocking, until one of the people who picks on me came over to my desk, and, in a shocking display of kindness, said: "Have you seen what __ drew about you?" I told him no, and he simply apologized and sat down in his usual spot. I was confused, but suspicious. And then, one of my best friends tells our teacher about It. Our teacher bangs her hands on her desk and stands bolt upright in a furious rage, calling __ to come outside the classroom (Catholic schools are discipline Nazis, my school is no exception), which usually means that you're in ******** deep s**t. I'm sure you could have heard our teacher screaming all the way to Japan, she was that angry. She promptly told everybody to SIT DOWN AND SHUT UP, while she sprinted out the door and into the hall and down the stairs. I was called to the principal's office so our principal could ask me what happened and why she would do this. My teacher had confiscated the offending image and handed it off to the principal, who showed it to me. The icure was a comic: I looked like a deranged Powerpuff Girl, and she drew my best friends shooting me down and killing me. I was filled with hate and anger. Why the ******** would she do this? I never did a thing wrong, she provoked me! She got suspended for a week, and after that, tried to turn my friends against me, which, luckily, was unsuccessful.

So, yeah, that's my story. Good luck with her, let's hope she doesn't do anthing that could cause you harm.  

[A r i s t t e]

Hello (:
well.
I just have to say that it's never happened to me before but here's what I would do.
First, I would confront her and your "supposed" friends. If those friends would believe the lies that Becca has said, then they aren't your real friends.
Also, like everyone else said, hitting is a big no. I mean, i do it to my friends but its like a soft playful punch. If she hits you hard enough to leave a bruise or something, it's way too serious to keep to yourself.
I think that if this keeps up, you should talk to an adult, like your parents or...ehh...counselor?
Don't feel bad about the people you've lost. Your true friends wouldn't just ditch you like that.
Honestly, that girl needs to be seriously talked to.  

[Kaiija]

...did she really HIT you? Like, so physical damage? I mean, otherwise I think it's kinda over reacting to just STOP being her friend. She obviously should NEVER be hitting anyone, but sometimes people do in shock. Those people need to be talked to and helped rather than shunned. You should have talked to her and been like, "Look... no one has the right to hit anyone else. Grow the hell up."

But if it was that serious then okay. She's obviously not being mature about this. I know this is rash and a lil embarrassing, but have you considered getting your schedule changed so you don't have to associate with her? If she doesn't see you she'll eventually find someone else to bother and harass. Eventually. I don't think switching schools is really the right idea.

Good luck <3