Losing Loved Ones

[Shayme]

I thought I would create a memorial thread/support group for those going through some kind of loss in their lives. The hardest thing to do at times like these is to move forward, but I hoped that we could do so together.

In August of this year, I lost my Grandmother and while I didn't have the chance to know her very well, living so far away, I do miss her greatly. I can see how much it hurts my dad as well.

But what I'm having the hardest time with right now is that I'm losing my brother. I cannot save him from himself and he doesn't care enough to do so either. He has fallen so far into drugs, that it is only a matter of time before he slips up and he'll be gone forever. If anyone else is struggling with the same issue, please post them here so we can know we're not alone.  

[Battousai-nii]

My sympathies. I'm going through the whole drug thing with my Dad right now. Years of using have screwed up his heart and mind. I also lost my grandparents in '02 and '05.

Try talking with your Dad about her. Remembering the good times can ease the pain of grieving.  

[Shayme]

Battousai-nii

My sympathies. I'm going through the whole drug thing with my Dad right now. Years of using have screwed up his heart and mind. I also lost my grandparents in '02 and '05.

Try talking with your Dad about her. Remembering the good times can ease the pain of grieving.

I have, but I honestly don't have many memories of her and that's something I don't want to admit to my dad. Thank you for the reply though. Good Luck with your dad too, I know it's hard.  

[4chaos69]

unfortunately ive lost both family and very dear friends. family to age and friends in combat. at least age is an unavoidable fate, but to see a young life lost to war is not easy to swallow. and as for drugs, i my self fell into them for some time. its very hard to reach someone with an addiction, as they feel they have no problem. it boils down to he individual wanting a change in his/her life. its a shity position to sit and watch someone do that to them selves. but really all you can do is try and be there and add advice tactfully when you can.  

[Zealand_Aquarius]

I can only offer my deepest sympathies to both of you. * hugs *

I lost my Nan coming up 11 year’s on 24th January, she was very ill and even though it’s been all this time I still get upset and miss her tons because I was very close to her she lived with my family since I was a baby so I got hit very hard as did my mum.

But one thing I will say is even if you have only a tiny memory of someone it’s still a memory of that person and it’s still something you can hold dear and share with other people so don’t feel bad if you don’t have much of a memory it’s still something.

 

[Shayme]

4chaos69

unfortunately ive lost both family and very dear friends. family to age and friends in combat. at least age is an unavoidable fate, but to see a young life lost to war is not easy to swallow. and as for drugs, i my self fell into them for some time. its very hard to reach someone with an addiction, as they feel they have no problem. it boils down to he individual wanting a change in his/her life. its a shity position to sit and watch someone do that to them selves. but really all you can do is try and be there and add advice tactfully when you can.

It's hard to be there for someone that doesn't even know you're around.

Zealand: Thank you! *hugs* I appreciate it.  

[Spotty-Chan]

I lost my grandfather a couple of Novembers back, he was the only one I really knew. On the bright side, I got a second chance to see the man I married and became semi-engaged that Thanksgiving. He drove me from Indianapolis to Columbus, Ohio so I could see him again, have him meet my parents and so I could say good-bye to grandpa all at one awkward moment.  

[Agent Ginrei]

*hugs* for everyone. This thread is a good idea, a place for people to vent their feelings during tough times. I lost a very close friend a few years ago, not sure whether it was due to the alcoholism, or the tumor in his head that he couldn't get taken care of due to lack of insurance. Was starting to feel like i was losing my mind, watching him suffer and fade like that. Again, many hugs for anyone grieving.  

[Demona_Darchanjel]

I lost my grandfather a few years ago very suddenly, he was sick, but it wasn't the cold that killed him. He had lost his will to live, and years of heavy drinking finally took its toll in a very gruesome fashion. I will not relay the details of his death, as it was an unpleasant one. I now live in constant fear of losing my grandmother, who falls sick easily, and gets double pneumonia at the drop of a hat. She can't live through many more illnesses and is already on oxygen from years of heavy smoking. It is only a matter of time, and I hate it. My grandmother means the world to me and I don't know what will happen to me when she goes.  

[Shayme]

It's too true that one of the hardest thing to do, is to watch them fade away. No matter how much you love them and will them to live, nothing changes. It's the worst kind of helplessness I've known, and ironicly I've known a few.  

[Keisaku Hakurei]

My mom's dad (years ago)
My dad's dad (this year)
My mom's mom (this year)


I fear I might become calloused against news of death in the family... the last two were only 1-2 seemingly-short months apart.  

[Lucky Lass 38]

Thank you for initiating this thread. Although I wept reading the comments, I felt less alone. I lost my first born son due to medical mis-mangement by doctors who didn't know and didn't care. Eight months later, my mom crossed over. It was the most horrible year of my life and even though it was 4 years ago,I still haven't recovered. Their illnesses and deaths play over in my head and dreams like an endless loop. Family and friends are uncomfortable with my continuing grief, so I hide it. Thanks for giving me the opportunity to express how much I hurt and for sharing your stories. It helps...  

[Faerie KatrinaZ]

I've lost multiple family members over the past decade or so. Grandma, Aunts, Uncles and a Brother-in-Law. Most recent was my mom, who died last Easter Sunday. She and my dad were "Snow Birds", spending winters in Florida, summers here in Michigan. When she was hospitalized last April, Drs. said my brother and I had enough time to fly down there and see her. Unfortunately, we got there about 6 hours too late. She had passed on right before our flight even left the ground. Really bummed that we didn't get a chance to see her before she died, but I did get a chance to talk to her a little the day before. At least we were there to support our dad. Miss my mom greatly, but at least we have many great memories to take her with us. neutral  

[Roxy526]

I lost my 2 older brothers over 10 years ago, I was pretty young but I have a few memories of them and a lot of old pictures that help keep my memories alive. They both died in Oct. less than a year apart. My aunt passed away on Sept. 17th 2001 so it will be 7 years tomorrow and today is my grandpa's(her dad's) birthday. I have been thinking a lot about all 3 of them lately and I wish they could have seen my kids and husband. emo  

[Miss Abigal of Lenox]

crying I'm about to lose my mom, she's 92, you know how blessed I am to have my mom with me all these years. It's like a part of you is slipping away. She's in the hospital now, and she has bounced back before and maybe she will this time too, only the Lord knows when, in the meantime I am just thankful that I still have her.