Mrh.

[Tai Takahashi]

I need advice or... Something. Someone to just understand, really.
[All my friends are online so, for the sake of this topic, we'll say that "everyone I know" refers to real life acquaintances.]

A little info before I begin - I'm 23, I live with my boyfriend in my parents' house and everyone I know is a maniacal, over the top pseudo-Christian.
I'm a Christian, I have nothing against other Christians so let me explain (and please don't get the wrong idea of Christians because of this).
These are the type of people that think relationships between a man and a woman should be of the same age, same religion, same political status, financial status, and other such things so the fact that we're living together, sharing a room and are around each other all the time while being unwed gets their panties in a knot.
They show very little support or understanding for the situation our lives have put us in that requires us to live here.

Now the brunt of this post is that, for two years now, I have felt like I do not belong anywhere. I cannot comfortably converse with those older than me because of my age and their unsupportive attitude towards my relationship and life in general. It always turns into critical, borderline derogatory, nonsense.
I cannot converse with those younger than me because the majority of them are way younger (let's face it, fourteen year olds just don't make for best friends at my age xp ).
It's gotten to the point where I'm uncomfortable being around them. I don't go out of my way to interact with them but I can't exactly avoid them entirely.

We're doing the best we can to get some money together, move out, etc. but is there any way to get these people to relax?
I don't know how much longer I'll be here and I'm tired of this "seen but never heard" existence I've adopted the past six months or so.
Yes, I've tried talking to them (not about this, recently, but about other issues I'll spare the world from knowing) but I'm constantly being dismissed.

Maybe forgetting them entirely and spending more time on here is all I need to do but I thank ye for listening to me venting anyway. xD  

[lady leko-chan]

honestly - I've found there is not much you can do to "get" others to relax. More or less, it is my opinion, that you do what you want to do and set up the example. For those with such strict/strong beliefs it is often, not always of course, the case that these beliefs are so strong because it has been all they have known. If you need something different - something more or even something less - you need to do it and show then by examples that in fact YES this can work as an acceptable life style. If these people, even if they are family, find that what you do is so intolerable that they disown you etc. then that shows a great deal of trouble on their part. I'm not saying you should be rude or disregard their feelings, they are your family after all. But sometimes all it takes a a bit of time, adjustments and acceptance.

I'll give you a bit of encouragement - I hope. My father is completely right wing as well as a pseudo-Christian as you have called it. He encompasses many of the traits you gave. My now husband is agnostic, and he outright told my father this while he and I were dating. Needless to say my father freaked out. But we (my hubby and I) dealt tactfully with what my father had to say etc. and were polite, we also live with my parents for about 3 months while we were getting ready to move far away - and we were not married at this time either. We recently did get married but did it in private and how we wanted to - then had a "reception" for my family to attend. It has taken much much time but my the advances have died down and the wish for happiness has become more prevalent. I hope this works out for you!! Just show your family that you are living for you and over time I hope they will want to be a bigger more meaningful part of your life again and come to you on better terms.
 

[Tai Takahashi]

That does help. Thank you.
I'm sure my family and the tards they know will stop being dumb at some point, it's just hard to wait for them to decide when that point will be. Especially when they're being so hypocritical.

How many times have they all told me that Jesus accepted everyone so we should too yet they can't even accept me? It's so annoying... And all the while I'm thinking there's worse things I could be doing. confused

I'll probably do the same thing you did. Get married somewhere without them then have a short reception so they can feel involved then bugger off. xd  

[Koichi Wing]

I would have to agree, there's really not much that you can do to get them to relax. I do have to say, That in today's society couples who have been dating for a couple years do move in together and are not married to test out the waters and etc and make that work before they eventually get married. whether or not you can convince others that this is the way that things are going for you etc yaddidah and that society accepts this, is a different matter.

razz good luck biggrin