I've been thinking about my parent's relationship.

[Light up the Night]

A bit of a ramble but here goes...

I have thought a lot over the past couple years about my parent's relationship. They have been married for over 20 years. My mom doesn't show any romantic interest in my dad. When they argue sometimes she will bring up not having sex with him even in front of me (I'm eighteen) and my younger brother (he's ten). I believe that they do not have sex at all anymore and she doesn't have any interest in him. This in itself shows a dysfunctional relationship to me. I have talked to her and she says that all she needs are my brother and I and she doesn't need anything else. She doesn't want a divorce and that it would mean losing our house. It hurts me to think that she's staying with my dad just for this house. I don't see how she could be happy being married to a man that she obviously doesn't have feelings for any more. I don't know much about my dad and don't talk to him about stuff like this. I speculate that he does want to be with her but she's rejecting him. Sometimes he kind of flirts with her and tries to hug her from behind or pat her butt or whatever and she just yells at him to get away and threatens to give him a "titty twist". What is happening here? Can I do anything to help? Should I talk to my mom more?  

[Intoxikace]

It really just sounds like they lost the spark and your mother isn't into trying to make it happen again.
Your dad seems like he's trying to get it going again.. like hugs from behind and crap.. but she just sounds like she is trying to avoid that.
Like she is no longer attracted to him or something.. which can happen over time.. looks change.. people change.. what they want in a lover changes.
Just leave it between the two of them.. it's their relationship.. it's just probably a really sad thing to see. D;  

[Light up the Night]

Yeah I really don't know what to do because apparently they've been fighting like this even since I was a child which was over 10 years ago. I never knew until about 6 months ago- my mom said they were better at hiding it then...
Also I'm worried about my brother too...
I don't think she'd even consider couple's therapy. She doesn't like him at all.
It's just hard to believe she's okay like she says he is.  

[MisterMaurice]

Oh my...

My mom and dad were never meant to be either. And yes, they did get a divorce back when I was 5, I believe. Basically, my dad was a bit... abusive. But that was because he had schizophrenia (Which I supposedly inherited from him, due to genetics).

But back on your situation. You'd probably have to have a decision to talk to either parent, and see what one of them of their interests; what parent likes & dislikes. Then alternate to the other parent.

I know I may not have the best knowledge on relationships, you might see that.  

[scrub]

My parents relationship was pretty shitty. That's why I wasn't really that upset when they separated, I kinda thought it was for the best sad

They where both unhappy and the time and now neither are so I look back at it as a good thing.  

[Light up the Night]

Dr Ruth actually answered my question:
I agree with you that two people who aren’t getting along shouldn’t stay together for the sake of the children or a house. They both would be better off separating and finding someone with whom to have a loving, sexual relationship. However, though you’re right, it’s not your place to get involved. You could show your mother my answer. You could write her a note explaining how you feel. But once you’ve stated your views, then you have to back off. You can’t nag your parents into divorcing, because then if they go ahead and later discover that they regret this decision, they’ll blame you. Relationships can be complicated and whatever you think, you don’t really know what is going on behind the scenes, so to speak. So you’re allowed to voice your opinion, but after that, I’d advise you to stay out of it.  

[Maze]

Pfffft, my parents have sex all the ******** seem pretty content, though, so, hey. As such I can't really offer any useful comments or advice, I'm afraid.

Good luck, though. o: