Maybe I'm not cut out for this.

[Gabrielle_AnimalLuver]

It's been over a month now, I've been working in the clinic. This is what I've spent 3yrs in school for, and still have a year left. Hundreds of dollars in fees and books. I was so sure this was the career for me. But I haven't been enjoying it at all.

Would you believe that assisting a euthanasia was NOT the worst part of my day by far?

First, I wanted to cry when my alarm went off this morning. It's not that I'm not a morning person. I just rise and set with the sun, and I unfortunately am not one of those people who can function on anything less than 7hrs but I really need 8 to be fully awake. So when my alarm went at 5:30 am after 6.5hrs of sleep, and it was PITCH black I felt like I wanted to just quit. And I think the only thing keeping me going honestly is that I can't afford to work just one job. Not with the lovely debt my pets have worked me into.

I arrived at work, early, and was informed that I had not shown up two weeks in a row. It turns out there are aTWO separate schedules, one for kennel and one for techs. Well, even when I'm working as a tech I do mostly kennel work, someone MAYBE could have pointed out to check the schedule. I only thought to write all my hours down in my calendar when they suddenly had me starting at 9 instead of 7 saturday but I showed up at 7 lacking sleep and no idea. So that had me in a horrible mood all day. I think there's maybe 2 techs at my clinic, who are genuinly nice. The rest I feel don't want me there.

I have no problem, picking up pee and poo and vomit. It's a downer to see the 3 month old pit bull with parvo or to assist a vet with a euthanasia. But the thing I really dislike about this job is not knowing what it is. So often I find myself literally looking around for something to do. I feel completely useless. There's most often nothing to run in the lab, so I will go and fold laundry, and then I get kind of a sarcastic remark about the fact that things "piled up" while I was gone. I don't mind doing a bit of everything but I can't be everywhere at once.

There's really nothing I can do. I NEED this job, to pay off all my vet bills. I start my stage in March and then I will be working in a different clinic full time but not getting paid. At which point I'm not too sure if I'll try to find a different job for the weekend or hold onto this one. I know that the new owner of my store could use me a few more hours. That might change by then. For now I'm trying, as hard as I need the money, to leave myself some time for school work. Since the store usually closes at 6 and classes end around 4-5. I can't exactly do more hours there right now.  

[Shearaha]

When I was doing my internships I really questioned if this was what I still wanted to do. I hated the time I spent at the one small animal (cat/dog) clinic. The staff was mean, the vet was a b***h and I was getting yelled at almost every time I turned around.

Then I found a job where I get on well with the rest of the staff (well mostly), the vets trust us to know what we're doing, and I'm encouraged to continue on in different related fields.

I know you'll make a great tech, just sounds like that clinic isn't a good fit for you.  

[Akari_32]

I agree that when you have the chance, you need to find somewhere you fit in better.

Have you made your feelings known to anyone higher up the food chain? Or even just to the people treating you like crap?

*side note* Sounds like this clinic is a little unorganized... ninja  

[DeeSpark]

You are stressed out enough with your personal life, the clinic sounds unorganized, staff sound rude, and you are probably not used to it yet.

I think you should stick with it. When you finish school you will be working with better staff that you can mostly get along with at least.  

[pompoennetje]

DeeSpark

You are stressed out enough with your personal life, the clinic sounds unorganized, staff sound rude, and you are probably not used to it yet.

I think you should stick with it. When you finish school you will be working with better staff that you can mostly get along with at least.

I agree with DS.
Also, even though the staff is rude you can get experience through this job. Maybe it'll be handy for your next internship.  

[SmoothSavage]

Gaby, I don't think you're giving yourself enough credit. You have a ton of personal stress in your life with your animals and all their issues, and that's going to affect everything. I mean, when Riddle first got her mast cell diagnosis, I was a WRECK. I couldn't sleep, couldn't eat, cried all the time, hell, I got myself so I was getting acid reflux from stress. I adore my jobs, both grooming and at the store, but there were mornings I would literally lie in bed and cry at the thought of getting up and going to work. I was so tired, mentally and physically, that I hated my jobs and barely managed to drag myself to them.

It also sounds like you don't mesh well with the people you work with, which also makes work SUCK. When nobody gets along with you, or the other staff is bitchy, it just makes everything a drag.

Hang in there. I think when your life is less stressful, and possibly if you find a different clinic with better staff, you'll find that you love your job.  

[Gabrielle_AnimalLuver]

Savage Destiny

Gaby, I don't think you're giving yourself enough credit. You have a ton of personal stress in your life with your animals and all their issues, and that's going to affect everything. I mean, when Riddle first got her mast cell diagnosis, I was a WRECK. I couldn't sleep, couldn't eat, cried all the time, hell, I got myself so I was getting acid reflux from stress. I adore my jobs, both grooming and at the store, but there were mornings I would literally lie in bed and cry at the thought of getting up and going to work. I was so tired, mentally and physically, that I hated my jobs and barely managed to drag myself to them.

It also sounds like you don't mesh well with the people you work with, which also makes work SUCK. When nobody gets along with you, or the other staff is bitchy, it just makes everything a drag.

Hang in there. I think when your life is less stressful, and possibly if you find a different clinic with better staff, you'll find that you love your job.

I'm sorry to hear that you went through that with Riddle. It does sound like what I'm dealing with. When I first got the news I was fighting back tears, and I was mad at my family for not grasping the severity of the issue. And I had sort of started to accept it, to even hope that with all the exercises and treatments we could get it under control enough so he can go back to running and playing like a normal dog. And then I saw the skis in my closet, they've never even touched snow. I started to cry again, and wonder if I'll get to use them this year or if I'll have to sell them, and how horrible that would be since they were a gift after all.

I did find out today that Rascal's xrays will only cost 55 bucks for 2 views. That's sort of amazing considering I spent 300 on Cowboy's 3 views. I'm taking him to school on Monday to do the xrays. I did LOOK at the hilld c/d and s/d and freaked out a bit. My store carries some of the most expensive non-vet foods on the market. This was still more. 45 bucks for a case of cans that would last like a week and a half. The dry would last longer sure, but with a specific gravity of 1.052 I don't want any dry food in my cat's diet. I don't care if it IS a good food, it's not worth the risks that come with a concentrated urine. Hopefully the rads will come up normal.

@Akari I don't really know how I would make my feelings known. I mean, if my feelings are a correct, and I'm NOT wanted there, well, they'll either lie about it or fire me. And if I'm somehow wrong, then I'll look like a paranoid retard. I did however, mention it to the tech in charge of my stage who is the same tech that does Cowboy's physio. She said it's probably not my imagination, she told me she has heard that some techs there are snobby. And my classmate who got me the interview, she told me missing work wasn't completely my fault, that the clinic IS unorganized and that our boss likes to give shifts without telling people.

I really wanted to quit today because I got a call asking why I wasn't at work. I wanted to die cause I couldn't believe it was happening again. I mean just yesterday I had been told there were TWO schedules, to check both. I was given next week's schedule to photocopy so not to forget. But in my shock, I didn't check to see if THIS week was the same as next week and/or if I had any shifts on Thursday. So yeah. despite being explained the double schedule thing, I ended up being 1.5hrs late for work. That's definitely a new record for me. I don't think I've ever been more than 10mins late for ANY job. And the ONE time in my life I was too sick to work I called before. I am not the kind of person to not show up. So, I feel like I'm off to a HORRIBLE start. Oh, and I'm working again on Tuesday from 4-9 which should be fun because my class finished at 5. rolleyes  

[Akari_32]

Gabrielle_AnimalLuver

...

@Akari I don't really know how I would make my feelings known. I mean, if my feelings are a correct, and I'm NOT wanted there, well, they'll either lie about it or fire me. And if I'm somehow wrong, then I'll look like a paranoid retard. I did however, mention it to the tech in charge of my stage who is the same tech that does Cowboy's physio. She said it's probably not my imagination, she told me she has heard that some techs there are snobby. And my classmate who got me the interview, she told me missing work wasn't completely my fault, that the clinic IS unorganized and that our boss likes to give shifts without telling people.

Is there any one there that you get along with, and feel comfortable talking to? I'd start there, actually. Tell them how you think some people don't like you, etc, etc, and see if they have any advice to offer (because with out being there, or knowing the people involved, its hard for any of us to give much advice in the way of human interaction >.<).

Gabrielle_AnimalLuver

I really wanted to quit today because I got a call asking why I wasn't at work. I wanted to die cause I couldn't believe it was happening again. I mean just yesterday I had been told there were TWO schedules, to check both. I was given next week's schedule to photocopy so not to forget. But in my shock, I didn't check to see if THIS week was the same as next week and/or if I had any shifts on Thursday. So yeah. despite being explained the double schedule thing, I ended up being 1.5hrs late for work. That's definitely a new record for me. I don't think I've ever been more than 10mins late for ANY job. And the ONE time in my life I was too sick to work I called before. I am not the kind of person to not show up. So, I feel like I'm off to a HORRIBLE start. Oh, and I'm working again on Tuesday from 4-9 which should be fun because my class finished at 5. rolleyes

Thats crazy. Lives are depending on that clinic, and they're all over the freaking place!

Not sure how they expect you to work at time that you are unavailable. I think the whole two-schedule thing is really stupid. And if they are going to have it, they need to cross check it, and explain any issues with it to those who can't figure it out.

Are there any other places you have or can look into? Surely, thats not the only clinic around there. I think you don't belong there. If doing what you really wanted to do is making you miserable because the people there are dicks, you don't need to be there.  

[Gabrielle_AnimalLuver]

I did apply to two other clinics and I never heard back from them. There's one last clinic close by but I can't work there because I'm doing my stage there. So I'm sort of stuck toughing it out at this clinic. Unless I maybe work more hours at the store until my stage and then when my stage ends I'm hoping to work there.  

[Akari_32]

Maybe you just need to check back with the other place, and let them know you'd still like to work with them.  

[Kipluck]

It's been mentioned before, but I think the clinic, the people you work with, etc. can make a HUGE difference with how happy you are. I know things didn't work out for me anyway, but I know that I could NEVER have worked at the place I did my job shadow.