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Sleeping wonder lies to me, and the lies are sweet.
This forum has seen a few posts about this boy before, so let's go ahead with this.
His name is Luke. I (as a love skeptic) have diagnosed myself with either being totally insane (quite possible) or being in love. Basically, when my mom died, he was the best comfort I had. The day she died, he didn't give all these platitudes or anything. He distracted me and made me laugh. That weekend, a whole lot of drama went down with my friends, and naturally they came to me to fix it. Which both pissed me off and hurt me that during a really hard time, they still wanted me to fix everything for them. He took over, told them off, and fixed all their problems for me. Before this point in time, we weren't really close. But after this, he started confiding things in me like a lot of people in our group did. I ended up moving in with my dad, but I came back to visit that summer. All summer, he kept telling me that he was thinking about things he shouldn't be as a guy with a girlfriend. After said girlfriend dumped him unceremoniously, he confessed that he'd been thinking about me. I didn't really like him, so I wasn't sure how to react. Well, a little while after this happened, the girl told him she'd traded their relationship for a good reputation in school. None of the guys cared about his feelings, and the other girls in our group all had crushes on him and didn't want to talk about his feelings. I became his shoulder to cry on basically. I started to develop feelings through the year of talking. When it came time for me to return for the summer again, one of our other friends asked me out. I wanted to talk to Luke first, because he gave good advice, and I kinda wanted to see if he liked me and would tell me not to go out with the other guy. The next day, before I could even call Luke, I found out he was back with his ex. So, I did something I'm not proud of: I got with that guy. I ended up telling him later that I didn't really have feelings for him and that it wouldn't work, so the relationship didn't last long. But Luke's did.
Fast forward the nearly two years of a dwindling friendship and a strengthening bond. A few weeks ago, I finally just had a breakdown over this whole thing. I didn't really have anyone who understood my situation, so nobody had advice for me. I ended up venting it all out to a good friend of mine who has never really dated, but she was a good outside perspective. She told me the best thing to do was to stop torturing myself and just end what was left of our friendship with him.
I was about to do it, too. Until I found out he broke up with his girlfriend. I was talking to him, and our conversation really sounded like the ones we used to have before he got back with her. A few of my friends keep telling me that I should tell him about my feelings. One of them is even convinced that he has the same feelings (which I think is unlikely). But I really think someone should just slap me and make me end all communication with him before I hurt myself again. This whole thing is confusing and awful and I hate it but I don't want to lose him, and right now I just want ice cream.
Help?
His name is Luke. I (as a love skeptic) have diagnosed myself with either being totally insane (quite possible) or being in love. Basically, when my mom died, he was the best comfort I had. The day she died, he didn't give all these platitudes or anything. He distracted me and made me laugh. That weekend, a whole lot of drama went down with my friends, and naturally they came to me to fix it. Which both pissed me off and hurt me that during a really hard time, they still wanted me to fix everything for them. He took over, told them off, and fixed all their problems for me. Before this point in time, we weren't really close. But after this, he started confiding things in me like a lot of people in our group did. I ended up moving in with my dad, but I came back to visit that summer. All summer, he kept telling me that he was thinking about things he shouldn't be as a guy with a girlfriend. After said girlfriend dumped him unceremoniously, he confessed that he'd been thinking about me. I didn't really like him, so I wasn't sure how to react. Well, a little while after this happened, the girl told him she'd traded their relationship for a good reputation in school. None of the guys cared about his feelings, and the other girls in our group all had crushes on him and didn't want to talk about his feelings. I became his shoulder to cry on basically. I started to develop feelings through the year of talking. When it came time for me to return for the summer again, one of our other friends asked me out. I wanted to talk to Luke first, because he gave good advice, and I kinda wanted to see if he liked me and would tell me not to go out with the other guy. The next day, before I could even call Luke, I found out he was back with his ex. So, I did something I'm not proud of: I got with that guy. I ended up telling him later that I didn't really have feelings for him and that it wouldn't work, so the relationship didn't last long. But Luke's did.
Fast forward the nearly two years of a dwindling friendship and a strengthening bond. A few weeks ago, I finally just had a breakdown over this whole thing. I didn't really have anyone who understood my situation, so nobody had advice for me. I ended up venting it all out to a good friend of mine who has never really dated, but she was a good outside perspective. She told me the best thing to do was to stop torturing myself and just end what was left of our friendship with him.
I was about to do it, too. Until I found out he broke up with his girlfriend. I was talking to him, and our conversation really sounded like the ones we used to have before he got back with her. A few of my friends keep telling me that I should tell him about my feelings. One of them is even convinced that he has the same feelings (which I think is unlikely). But I really think someone should just slap me and make me end all communication with him before I hurt myself again. This whole thing is confusing and awful and I hate it but I don't want to lose him, and right now I just want ice cream.
Help?
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Music is sung with simple words, and simple words can save the world.
Music is sung with simple words, and simple words can save the world.
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