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Reply 24. ✿ - - - Life Issues
I don't know what to do

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TEWG

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PostPosted: Sat Dec 22, 2012 5:40 pm
It's a "my step-dad is molester-man" story.

I've always had a bad connection with my step-dad. He's a terrible, idiotic man.

Today in the morning he came up to me with a wad of cash with what looked like $100. He told me that he would give me $30 or $40 if I let him place it in my bra. The 30 is if I have bad boobs and the 40 if I have good ones. $60 if I let him put it in my v****a.

He's a sicko. I naturally told him no, repeatedly. I am having financial issues but I will not resort to that. He went on vacation today with my mom and will not be coming back until Monday.

He told me that when he comes back, he expects me to do it when we're alone and it's just us. I'm scared cause he usually comes home on the weekends at around 1 and that's the time my mom goes shopping and I'm home alone.

What should I do? sad
 
PostPosted: Sat Dec 22, 2012 5:42 pm
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Um police?
 

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TEWG

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PostPosted: Sat Dec 22, 2012 5:46 pm
little aishi chan
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Um police?

I have tried that once a few years ago. It didn't work.
 
PostPosted: Sat Dec 22, 2012 5:47 pm
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Try it again this year. It's sexual harassment.
 

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jesusgirl115

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PostPosted: Sat Dec 22, 2012 5:54 pm
Is your mother aware? If she isn't you really need to tell her, one for your safety and two if you do contact the police her knowing about it will definitely help you.

And two when your mother isn't home and you know it will be just the two of you maybe leave until your mom is back, go to the local coffee shop, library, mall, somewhere and just do homework, read, or anything. You being alone with him does not sound safe and he may force himself on you one day.

But you really do need to contact the police, this is sexual harassment and not okay. Plus now that you are older the police may be more likely to believe and help you.
 
PostPosted: Sat Dec 22, 2012 6:47 pm
You should contact the police and tell your mom about it. That guy really sounds like a creeper, and you and your mom need to talk about what to do. If that doesn't work then I think you should still try doing it and tell someone else, a friend and/or an adult you can trust. They might be able to help.

I also agree with jesusgirl115, you should avoid being alone with him. Go to a mall, or stay at a friend's house. And maybe get some self defense stuff like a taser or something just in case you're alone with him.
 

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PostPosted: Sun Dec 23, 2012 8:27 pm
I would say to get law enforcement involved. If your stepfather tries something, call the police, and hopefully they can be of help.

Sometimes police officers need "evidence" or witnesses and your mother may not testify against him. If you have any physical markings of an assault by him - go to the police station while they are gone and the mark is still there and try to explain everything. If you need to talk to an officer then go while your parents are on vacation and try to get a hold of an officer that will hear your problems and just let it all out - let them know you're afraid for your safety and make sure to mention the things he said to you and if you have any physical evidence of things, bring it along.

Depending on how old you are - if you are 18+, then try to get a job while they are gone and start working. Try to save enough to move out of there for good. Or, if you have a friend that will let you live with them then go with that. If you have a friend with kind, loving parents perhaps open up to them about the situation if they would be against it because they may help you out.

I'm sorry to hear about your situation and hope it gets better soon!  
PostPosted: Mon Dec 24, 2012 1:06 pm
Keep calling the police. Keep notifying them of any incident. Don't let anything slip. If you keep on trying to get them to do something, then they'll more than likely understand that there is indeed something very wrong. I know in many cases, the police need evidence of this sort of thing before they can/will act, but just keep doing it. Document everything. Any kind of evidence of his harassment will help. They'll have to figure something is up if you keep accusing your stepdad of these things and if you also have proof that's even better. Tell them that you are not safe, do anything that'll get them to act.

Does your mom know? Does anyone know? Try and see if you can speak to a trusted adult/friend about this. In your mom's case, I can see that you might be scared to speak up since this is the man (I assume) she loves and wouldn't see him doing any wrong, but she needs to know. You're her daughter, she should be protecting you from things like this. I can't imagine a mother who would just let someone harass and potentially do worse things to her own daughter. But if she does know and isn't willing to listen, then contact other people. Get anyone to know about this and see if they can help. The more people you have backing you up on this, the better.

Just try try try not to be alone at home with him. Really, go anywhere else that you feel safe at. A friend's house, the store, the park, the library, anywhere that you feel comfortable being at for a while until your mom comes home. If you know your mom is leaving, then you leave too. Maybe even ask if you can go with her. It may not seem great, but anything is better than being alone with him.

I hope something can be done about this. Something needs to be done about this. This is no way to live, in fear of being hurt in your own home. I'm sorry you're going through this, just please do whatever you can to get it to stop. I wish I could be of more help or offer you a place to stay, I really hope you can get out of this.
 


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Marnomy

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PostPosted: Thu Dec 27, 2012 7:57 pm
TEWG


Set up a hidden camera/s in your bedroom, and if you can, in any room that you tend to hang out in, or before he comes in the room. This is an idea I got from the book Such A Pretty Girl by Laura Weiss, which is about a teen who was molested by her father.

If it ever happens (and I really hope it doesn't) then you will have sufficient video evidence to put that ******** in jail. Video evidence is the best evidence, though... which is very sad.

Plan escape routes if you ever happen to be alone with him. Stay out of the house when you can if he's home. Go for walks around the neighborhood, read a book and sip coffee at the local cafe, whatever you can.

Try to record a similar conversation with your stepfather (try using your phone, which I believe most have some sort of recording device on it and press the button when it's hidden in your hoodie pocket). Show it to the police, your mom, anyone who can do anything about it.

Tell your mother, but I'm not sure if she'd believe you or not without evidence.

Everything that the above girls mentioned is what else I would've said, too.

Please be safe, girl. Please have a weapon on you at all times—that you can take out of your pocket easily—when you're around him—a pair of scissors, a screwdriver, a box cutter, anything. Maybe some mace. Hide something large near your bed so you can hit him with it, if need be.

Educate yourself with some self defense moves, which you can probably look up online.

Tell your friends. Tell your TEACHERS for goodness sake, if you go to school. Is there a counselor you can talk to? How about a close family member (uncle, aunt, older cousin) who will believe you?

I know I sound pessimistic, but assault on women by someone who is not a stranger, i.e. a family member, is more common than you may think.

I just don't want you to get hurt—and if it does happen, then you can put that sick mother ******** in prison.
 
PostPosted: Fri Dec 28, 2012 12:16 am
Thanks for all the help girls.
I'll be safe from him until until February...
 

TEWG

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24. ✿ - - - Life Issues

 
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