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 Posted: Sat Dec 29, 2012 3:05 pm
Since last year I've always had mixed up feelings about this one boy. He was sick minded and not the smartest, but I really led myself to believing that I genuinely thought I could be happy with him. Even though he acted the way he did, he was sweet and funny and considerate deep down. Since we go to different high schools, I decided that at the graduation dance I would finally tell him how I felt. That was, of course, until he got caught up in a fight and got kicked out of the dance. I never quite got to tell him, and the words keep getting stuck in my throat.
So the problem is now, every time I see photos of him on his Facebook or remember all the memories he gave me (He kissed me on the cheek at a pool party and ran away just to tease me.) I feel twisted inside. I know he's probably forgotten about me but I've never forgotten about him. In fact, I wish I could be in a relationship just so maybe I could stop thinking about him. But it's almost like the memories are haunting me. I haven't talked to him recently either; I'm not sure what to say. I don't think I ever truly got over him, and I don't know how.
I think I need some closure for the feelings I never got out. But how can I have closure whenI may still care for him that way? As much as I hate to admit it, I miss him, and I want to hear his voice again.
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Posted: Sat Dec 29, 2012 10:23 pm
I think it wouldn't hurt for you to strike up a conversation with him. It's better to find out now than to wonder for more years to come "what if" there could be something there between you two. Since you mentioned facebook, it's a lot easier to message someone "hey, how's it going?" than to walk up to them and talk face to face. Then you can go from there. (: If all goes well maybe a date or something. heh.
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Posted: Thu Jan 03, 2013 6:55 am
Something I've always kept with me:
When my mom was younger, she had a crush on a boy. She was afraid of rejection and was shy and never told him.
He ended up taking his life because nobody loved him, or so according to his note.
Message him, talk to him. You don't have to come right out and say your feelings, but start talking to him and see where that leads.
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Posted: Fri Jan 04, 2013 11:21 pm
You know, I was actually in a pretty similar situation not too long ago. I kind of got cut off before I was done and it left me feeling incomplete. Eventually, I just let it all out to him, and since then it's gotten way better. I think that you should talk to him- Facebook recommended if you're anything like me, and do better putting thoughts into typed up sentences and like keeping any physically noticeable emotions out of it. Just be completely honest, and once it's all out there, you can start whatever the next process may be. There's that sort of festering uneasiness that's really hard to shake when you have something like that that's bothering you. The best thing to do is just get it off your chest.
The best of luck to you emotion_bigheart
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