Trying to help out a peer with homophobic family members.

[RainOfEuphoria]

I need help! Please read the following and if you have any suggestions please share.

A member of my GSA has come a long way, he (cisgender, straight, male) went from being homophobic himself to joining GSA and standing up to his parents and brother for their insentient bashing and dislike of homosexual individuals (including hating on gay actors and frequent usage of the f-word and gay in a derogatory manner). He wants to change the ways which they are quite set in and of course I would like to as well.

One of the largest issues here is that none of his family knows anyone closely that is homosexual. So there is clearly a large disconnect between them logical judgment of anything related to homosexuality. I think educating them would be the best thing to do, however I'm not certain how to go about it. I by no means wish to shove ideas down their throats. Just hopefully get them to see a different side than what they have seen all their lives.

I live in a pretty liberal part of California so I don't have experience with situations such as this.

Any ideas on what we should do?


(Please excuse any weird sentences and grammar my keyboard is being odd and deleting things if I go back into a sentence to edit it. Would anyone know how to fix that either?)  

[Shanna66]

with my family i just sneak it into the conversation that all us non straights arent going to hell, then i remind them the westbrobaptist church is nuts and they are starting to sound like them, i just sneak that in whenever they are getting out of line since i havent come out to all of them yet just for that reason  

[lenon01]

Perhaps he could have a gay friend over for a day without telling his parents about the person's orientation, and after they leave (with permission, of course) they could tell the family that the kid was gay? It's really the only thing I can think of, but it should more or less show that whatever stereotypes they have about gay individuals aren't necessarily true.

I've basically been involved in something akin to this, although it wasn't really planned. A friend of mine has some homophobic family and they all absolutely adore me, and now that they know I'm gay she hasn't told me about any of them really hating on gay people ( except an uncle, but he's kind of the one exception ).  

[RainOfEuphoria]

lenon01

Perhaps he could have a gay friend over for a day without telling his parents about the person's orientation, and after they leave (with permission, of course) they could tell the family that the kid was gay? It's really the only thing I can think of, but it should more or less show that whatever stereotypes they have about gay individuals aren't necessarily true.

I've basically been involved in something akin to this, although it wasn't really planned. A friend of mine has some homophobic family and they all absolutely adore me, and now that they know I'm gay she hasn't told me about any of them really hating on gay people ( except an uncle, but he's kind of the one exception ).

Thank you very much, I think that is a fantastic idea! ...Now I'll just need to find him some gay friends! Sadly that may be the harder part because he is quite annoying despite his good intentions. :/  

[lenon01]

RainOfEuphoria

lenon01

Perhaps he could have a gay friend over for a day without telling his parents about the person's orientation, and after they leave (with permission, of course) they could tell the family that the kid was gay? It's really the only thing I can think of, but it should more or less show that whatever stereotypes they have about gay individuals aren't necessarily true.

I've basically been involved in something akin to this, although it wasn't really planned. A friend of mine has some homophobic family and they all absolutely adore me, and now that they know I'm gay she hasn't told me about any of them really hating on gay people ( except an uncle, but he's kind of the one exception ).

Thank you very much, I think that is a fantastic idea! ...Now I'll just need to find him some gay friends! Sadly that may be the harder part because he is quite annoying despite his good intentions. :/

Haha, well, I wish you luck~
Just remember, the person has to have given express permission to tell the family! The thing I went through ended up with the family knowing without my permission to tell them - and while it doesn't really matter to me, it's a big thing for some people!
emotion_yatta  

[RainOfEuphoria]

lenon01

RainOfEuphoria

lenon01

Perhaps he could have a gay friend over for a day without telling his parents about the person's orientation, and after they leave (with permission, of course) they could tell the family that the kid was gay? It's really the only thing I can think of, but it should more or less show that whatever stereotypes they have about gay individuals aren't necessarily true.

I've basically been involved in something akin to this, although it wasn't really planned. A friend of mine has some homophobic family and they all absolutely adore me, and now that they know I'm gay she hasn't told me about any of them really hating on gay people ( except an uncle, but he's kind of the one exception ).

Thank you very much, I think that is a fantastic idea! ...Now I'll just need to find him some gay friends! Sadly that may be the harder part because he is quite annoying despite his good intentions. :/

Haha, well, I wish you luck~
Just remember, the person has to have given express permission to tell the family! The thing I went through ended up with the family knowing without my permission to tell them - and while it doesn't really matter to me, it's a big thing for some people!
emotion_yatta

Thank you dear! cat_3nodding
Mhmm, I would never out someone unless they specifically gave me permission to in a certain situation.  

[RainOfEuphoria]

Shanna66

with my family i just sneak it into the conversation that all us non straights arent going to hell, then i remind them the westbrobaptist church is nuts and they are starting to sound like them, i just sneak that in whenever they are getting out of line since i havent come out to all of them yet just for that reason

Thank you! I'll give that as suggestion!