So... uh... I'm a Demisexual?

[Belethiel]

I was just hanging out in a forum thread and someone mentioned that they were demisexual and explained it.

I would say that this fits me.

I don't really feel physical attraction toward strangers, only people I know. I used to act like I do, like I'll say a celebrity is sexy or something, but... meh. Doing that seems fake to me now. I think some people are beautiful and stuff, but that's it.

This basically means that my attraction grows with friendships first. o3o

I'm not sure how I feel about romance. I think I would be okay with dating a transgender/transexual man, but I'm not sure about girls. It's hard to tell with me and what I like, I suppose. I'm still trying to figure myself out now, I used to think I was heterosexual/heteromantic, but I'm not so sure anymore.

Are there any gray-As out there who had trouble trying to find the right words to describe yourself?  

[Chris ex Machina]

I guess I'm partially like you. The only people I've dated where among my best friends at one time or another, and I feel that's how a relationship really should be.
I really don't know how to describe my self. I don't find many good looking people "hot" or "sexy" in the normal sense of the word, and most guys or girls I don't see in any way other than friends. I'm not asexual, since I do get attracted to people, but like you, only friends. So like you, I'm confused on what to call myself, other than me.  

[Belethiel]

Noire Samhain

I guess I'm partially like you. The only people I've dated where among my best friends at one time or another, and I feel that's how a relationship really should be.
I really don't know how to describe my self. I don't find many good looking people "hot" or "sexy" in the normal sense of the word, and most guys or girls I don't see in any way other than friends. I'm not asexual, since I do get attracted to people, but like you, only friends. So like you, I'm confused on what to call myself, other than me.

Right now, I think the best way to do this is to just... be myself. :3 Be me. It's not like I really need a word. I know what I like and who I am. I'm still kind of confused about some stuff, but I'll work it out eventually.  

[Chris ex Machina]

Belethiel

Noire Samhain

I guess I'm partially like you. The only people I've dated where among my best friends at one time or another, and I feel that's how a relationship really should be.
I really don't know how to describe my self. I don't find many good looking people "hot" or "sexy" in the normal sense of the word, and most guys or girls I don't see in any way other than friends. I'm not asexual, since I do get attracted to people, but like you, only friends. So like you, I'm confused on what to call myself, other than me.

Right now, I think the best way to do this is to just... be myself. :3 Be me. It's not like I really need a word. I know what I like and who I am. I'm still kind of confused about some stuff, but I'll work it out eventually.

Being yourself is the best thing one can do in any situation. Confusion comes with getting older, but as long as you stay true to yourself, everything will be fine.  

[Raeiko]

I guess I'm kind of like that too  

[Crazy_Evil_Mother7]

I think a lot of people are. I have dated people who weren't my friends but I notice I fall for more of my friends then strangers.  

[Belethiel]

Crazy_Evil_Mother7

I think a lot of people are. I have dated people who weren't my friends but I notice I fall for more of my friends then strangers.

I wonder how many people don't know. : P  

[TasmanianTiger]

I always say that everyone is a little bit gay (and vice versa, in my case.) I think all it takes is one GREAT personality to make someone question their orientation. Although you might not feel an instant attraction to a gender or a stranger, love and physical attraction can certainly grow between two people, based completely on personality.

I, at one point, was 100% completely and totally a lesbian without a question in my mind. I decided this sometime early in highschool and never looked back. I had no physical attraction to guys of any sort and up until a certain point, I had not met a single guy who could have ever gone past the friendship zone. At the end of my senior year, however, I met my current boyfriend. The attraction wasn't even something that happened over time. I fell in love with him from his personality alone... immediately. It was unlike anything I had ever experienced before. It SUCKED loosing my lesbian cred, because everyone just assumed that I had gone through a phase, but it's been 5 years, we're most definitely getting married, AND I still DEFINITELY LIKE GIRLS.

So, I guess what I am trying to get at is - sexuality is fluid. I believe that it is fluid for everyone. It just takes one person to change everything and you shouldn't have to limit yourself with a title like "demisexual," "asexual" or "hetrosexual." You'll probably always question your orientation and that doesn't make you more or less of a person. It takes a while to come to terms with the unknowingness, but whatever! People love who they want to love, nowadays. smile Don't label yourself if you don't feel you need to.  

[loonaboots]

i'm kinda like that? i identify as asexual, somewhat gray asexual, if that makes sense. but i am thinking about just going with the gray-asexual label? because it's a lot easier to explain.
tl;dr: i have never experienced sexual attraction (although i am on the fence about one time), but i am thinking about identifying as gray-asexual instead of asexual, as i am starting to think it fits me more.

so.. yeah. anyways, welcome to the ace spectrum, sweetie! nice to have you! c:  

[Lifty_Raccoon]

I'm pretty sure it's common. I mean, friends are close to you and know you, right? It makes sense one would fall for friends a lot. *Is guilty of falling for quite a few friends o3o*  

[Amadeaus Demeter]

There are a lot of "-sexuals" now, I thought pansexual fit me fairly well but lately I realized that none of them actually fit who I am, so I just don't classify myself anymore.  

[tiedyedtrash]

I have an internet filter on my computer (Norton Family) that blocks LGBTQ sites and lists them as "Mature Content." They've even included asexual sites. How...even?

Anyways, I've always assumed that's how everyone's sexuality was. Hmm..shows how much I know. biggrin  

[Keakealani]

Welcome to the club! Haha. (fellow demi here ^^)

I think I know what you mean, though. I can get behind aesthetic beauty (especially with femme/female forms), but I don't like, get turned on and stuff. It works for me, though. I am actually kind of glad I can avoid thinking about sex - all that advertising and stuff doesn't work on me! XD  

[tiedyedtrash]

I don't know if I would exactly count as demi, though it's the closest so far. I'm VERY comfortable being close to people, and am extremely cuddly, but I prefer not to do much more than kissing.  

[Keakealani]

sylasnstorm

I don't know if I would exactly count as demi, though it's the closest so far. I'm VERY comfortable being close to people, and am extremely cuddly, but I prefer not to do much more than kissing.

I think especially with demi- type labels, it really is all what it means to you. "Demi-" technically just means "half", as in "halfway to asexual". Whether or not you interpret that as "enjoying some sexual activity and not others" (e.g. enjoying kissing/cuddling but not intercourse) or as "being sexually attracted only to a small number of people" (i.e., the "usual" definition of being sexually attracted only after a strong emotional/romantic attachment), I think both (and more) qualify under the demi- monicker. Although, I think grey-A expresses the former well, since it's a little less "co-opted" by a specific type of demisexuality.