How do you keep from cussing?

[Saikii]

I know the Bible says to keep your yes yes and your no no, though in a society where cussing has become a normal expression of frustration, I've found it is easier said than done. Sometimes I won't even mean to when I'm frustrated or sad and the words will still come out.

I know that words can be a reflection of the heart. I know I'd like not to cuss. I apologize to God when I do cuss, but it's been difficult not to swear/cuss. In apology, when you mean it, the aim is not to do the thing again, which is my intention, but then I catch myself doing that time and time again.  

[cristobela]

edited to consistently capitalize pronouns when I'm referring to God, add detail, & correct grammar

Saikii

I know the Bible says to keep your yes yes and your no no, though in a society where cussing has become a normal expression of frustration, I've found it is easier said than done. Sometimes I won't even mean to when I'm frustrated or sad and the words will still come out.

I know that words can be a reflection of the heart. I know I'd like not to cuss. I apologize to God when I do cuss, but it's been difficult not to swear/cuss. In apology, when you mean it, the aim is not to do the thing again, which is my intention, but then I catch myself doing that time and time again.

Be careful of what you let inside of your heart in the first place.

• Proverbs 4:23 (NIV)
  
  23 Above all else, guard your heart,
      for everything you do flows from it.

The “heart” is just one way Scripture refers to the inner-being. And your inner-being can be affected, not just by things you yourself think about or allow your mind to linger on as something to be enjoyed, but by things other people around you say/communicate as well. So take inventory of what you're letting in through your eyes and ears. How much of that is a source of profane speech and totally unavoidable? How much of it can you get rid of? be it certain music artists (who use profane speech in their lyrics), TV shows, movies, cartoons, books, games, radio stations, podcasts, YouTube channels, people? Replace them with those who don't use profane speech—because it's not enough to get rid of what's bad, you need to fill your inner-being with good and linger on that. What you store up in your heart is what will come out:

• Luke 6:45 (NIV)
  
  45 A good man brings good things out of the good stored up in his heart, and an evil man brings evil things out of the evil stored up in his heart. For the mouth speaks what the heart is full of.

At the end of the day, all of those things I just listed are ways to communicate ideas/words/information from person to person. You have to change the sources of information that are coming in and plugging into your heart, allowing their thoughts to circulate in your mind. After cutting ties with them / being removed for a while, those thoughts die down and you begin adopting a new form of communicating. You can correct the people around you—or separate from them. But whatever you immerse yourself in, is what you end up patterning yourself after. Ergo,

• 1 Corinthians 15:33 (NIV)
  
  33 Do not be misled: “Bad company corrupts good character.”[a]
  
  Footnotes:
  
  a. 1 Corinthians 15:33 From the Greek poet Menander
  
  
• Proverbs 13:20 (NIV)
  
  20 Walk with the wise and become wise,
      for a companion of fools suffers harm.
  
  
• Proverbs 22:24-25 (NIV)
  
  24 Do not make friends with a hot-tempered person,
      do not associate with one easily angered,
  25 or you may learn their ways
      and get yourself ensnared.

If the people around you are constantly speaking foolishness, speaking carelessly, and without consideration of how their words can affect others, quick to insult/belittle the person they're talking to, easy to rage and vent out frustration, that is what you'll do and pattern yourself after.

But if the people constantly around you are speaking wisely, carefully, with discretion, considerate of how their speech will affect others, are people who are slow to anger, patient, overlooking insults, and do not so easily vent out in frustration, that is what you'll naturally end up patterning yourself after.

Personally, I just tend to sigh when I'm frustrated.(edit: oh and an exasperated "uggh" at times lol).

So by all means possible, eliminate the sources that are profane. Fill their empty void with good examples. If you can't purify the people around you, then find other people to associate with. And if you can't find anything good, then you may be alone or devoid of entertainment and companionship for a while. But if that's the case, it's better to be isolated / missing something worldly than in the presence of things that make you sin, fill your mind with sin, or cause you harm.

• Matthew 5:29 (NIV)
  
  29 If your right eye causes you to stumble, gouge it out and throw it away. It is better for you to lose one part of your body than for your whole body to be thrown into hell.
  
  
• Proverbs 21:19 (KJV)
  
  19 It is better to dwell in the wilderness,
      than with a contentious and an angry woman.

However, pray for godly companionship (even if it's just one other person), and for sources that provide good input / good examples. Ask God to help you note what are the doors you're leaving open for profane speech that you don't need to have open, to help you close them / eliminate them.

Let's not forget we have a God who provides (when you ask for good things, rely on His timing). He can provide good sources to surround yourself with and immerse yourself in—if it be His will for you to be accompanied by people at this period / stage in your life, because you may need your "40 days and 40 nights" in the middle of the desert somewhere alone with God. Or maybe He won't bring someone to you if He sees something profane in you that would hurt them. Just make sure you're obeying Him the Way He asks, don't yoke yourself to evil, and rely on His will,

• Matthew 7:8 (NIV)
  
  8 For everyone who asks receives; the one who seeks finds; and to the one who knocks, the door will be opened.
  
  
• 1 John 3:22 (NIV)
  
  22 and receive from him anything we ask, because we keep his commands and do what pleases him.
  
  
• Proverbs 19:14 (NIV)
  
  14 Houses and wealth are inherited from parents,
      but a prudent wife is from the Lord.

I know the latter is about a wife, but any kind of prudent companionship is from God.


In short:

- be purposeful about the entertainment, people, and other input of information that you surround yourself with and immerse yourself in; eliminate what is filling your mind with profane speech (if need be, you may need to be alone for a while).

- ask God in prayer for help to clean up what is unclean in your heart, in your surroundings, and to fill it up with good alternatives/good sources of information and socialization.

 

[icecreamcoloredgirl]

For me, it helps to just use replacements since I work with kids.
Holy Smokes, and some random "you scared me" one I've made up was Shnikeys :p