[PRP] Letters from Home (Elibrie/Juhvek)

[Meepfur]

Lullaby winked into existence with a soft peep, alighting on a nearby surface to look around and get his bearings.  He was looking for...aha!  There!  Little Lady's person! The dark blue hopped over to Juhvek's bedside and leaned towards the man with a 'Prrrrrpt?' to offer both a boop and the Very Important Thing he'd been sent with.

Quote:

Dear Juhvek,

I feel like I've written this a hundred times, and even if I tried a hundred more it still wouldn't be right.  But when I heard you were awake, I had to write.  I don't know what to say, other than how much we all miss you and want you home.  I wish I could see you and talk to you.  Everything seems so different, and it's not right without you here, but I try to take deep breaths and tell myself it's going to be okay.  I don't think I'm as convincing as you are when you say it.

I know you must have a lot to focus on, but I just wanted you to know that we're as alright as we can be, and we're thinking of you.  It's not very much, I know, but I hope knowing that will help somehow.  I'm sorry we're too far away to do anything but think of you, but we do.  All the time.

You don't have to send anything back if you're not feeling up to it, I've even told Lullaby not to wait once he's said hi for me.  I'm sure Snoops will be disappointed when he figures out where he's been, but I thought you'd prefer Lullaby.  At least he has manners. If there's anything we can do, just send Little Lady.

Elibrie

demon_pachabel

 

[demon_pachabel]

Juhvek wasn't the first to notice his visitor, but rather it was the little green who had curled up in his lap and had found herself with a bit of a rubber neck to see who was coming and going from any room. That the visitor was small and blue and very familiar earned a small 'chrrrr-up!' from Little Lady, who kneaded her little paws before stretching her neck out to sniff at her father.

"Well, I'd say you think you have the visitor rather than me," Juhvek mused as he scritched the back of his firelizard's neck, making her entire body twist with delight before she stretched, stood, and immediately flopped over in some plea for attention from Lullaby.

Juhvek, however, relieved him of the letter. "Hello, Lullaby," he greeted, giving liberal scritches and patting his lap near Little Lady before opening the letter to give it a read.


It would be some time before he could actually get the materials needed to do any return writing, but that allowed some time for thinking on what he could actually communicate fully in a return letter.

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Dear Elibrie,

I have been fortunate in having many visitors as they can make themselves available since I woke. While I would have enjoyed to see your face amongst them, it was brought to my understanding that you had other obligations you cannot travel with. Congratulations - I certainly have been put at a loss for not being able to meet him properly.


If it is any help, I know that the lessons and hard work of becoming a proper Dragonrider will suit you. If I am lucky, I'll be back at High Reaches before your entire training is up. I'd be a sore excuse for a friend to miss the entire thing.

To be honest, right now I am mostly healing and have a lot of time to myself. Your nice letter was a needed break from the monotony of my day to day. Thank you.

- Juhvek.

Meepfur

 

[Meepfur]

Despite his instructions, Lullaby had been only too happy to remain, booping Little Lady fondly and settling in Juhvek's lap for a cuddle.  The blue had exactly zero sense of urgency - while he might not need to wait for a letter to return to His with, it wasn't as though he'd been forbidden from lingering.  The young man clearly had no objections to his presence, and he was ever-so-good at scritching, besides!  So he was content to pass the time, humming with pleasure and grooming his no-longer-hatchling until such time as he was sent on his way.

Elibrie wasn't entirely surprised by how long it took Lullaby to return...and the longer it took him, the more her hope had grown that he would indeed have a letter for her.  While she'd said she didn't expect one, and she'd meant it, she'd certainly wanted one.  It felt like forever since she'd seen her friend, and when last she had, well...that was a memory she could do without.  And unlike some others could, there was no way she would be able to visit, to see him and talk to him in person.  But it was what it was, so she'd make do with letters.  When Lullaby did finally return, she wasted no time in taking the letter from him - with a fond kiss on the nose for his troubles - and reading it.  Over and over.

It was short and to the point, of course, but it still meant the world.  Such a simple little thing, but it brought tears to her eyes, though they were quickly nuzzled away by Kesucianth.  It would be a sevenday before she wrote again, courtesy of both the busy schedule of weyrlinghood and her own back-and-forth with herself about what exactly to write.  How much should she say about what, and what was better to leave out?  It was a difficult balance to find between wanting to talk to her friend and not wanting to burden him with more than he already had on his shoulders. But eventually, Lullaby would appear with another missive.

Quote:

Dear Juhvek,

I am sorry I can't come and visit, and Kesucianth wants me to extend his apologies, as well.  We both understand why we can't, but we still wish we could.  I can't wait for you to meet each other.  He's just perfect, and of course you were right and he's a blue.  He's the most handsome one I've ever seen, for sure, and a sweetheart.  I can't imagine a more perfect dragon.

I'm glad you think I'll make a good rider.  I've worried a lot about it, but I guess that's not a surprise.  We're doing our best, though, and I think we're doing okay.  It feels like everyone's watching, though, and that doesn't make me feel any better.  But we're doing fine, we really are, I just worry about silly things I shouldn't, like always.  I want to get everything right the first time, but that doesn't always happen.  I just don't want anyone to think Kesucianth made a mistake, or Menankith or Cinonth, that I'm not strong enough for this.

I'm sure you'll be back long before we graduate, but even if you aren't, it wouldn't make you a sore excuse for a friend.  You're one of my best friends, and nothing could ever change that.

- Elibrie

demon_pachabel

 

[demon_pachabel]

He'd not expected another letter back with any urgency - to be written to in the first place had been a surprising treat in and of itself. So Juhvek had put any urgent thought of it to one side and instead put his focus on his own day to day necessities. There was a lot more involvement of a Mindhealer than he'd expected himself to need to talk about things that were still most blurs of feelings and colors at best. The entire incident was a mostly unrecalled blob. His clarity ended even before the humming had began. How much he'd heal both physically and mentally was still a lot of conjecture.

On top of that, there were the fortunate visits from loving family and a handful of older riders who had considered him enough their friend to drop by and check in when they could. Juhvek was a melting pot of conflicting feelings - many of which he'd at least allowed himself to share with his mother in what times he saw her.

So when another letter did arrive, it was a pleasant reprieve from miring in his own mind - something Juhvek had plenty of time to do now. Perhaps more than anything else. Lullaby was offered another scritch and he continued to idly do so as he read over Elibrie's letter.

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Elibrie,

I will have to imagine what the most perfect dragon on Pern looks like until I can actually see such with my own eyes.

It was in this moment the actual realization that such was likely beyond him now and he actually took a break before he'd finished writing the rest of it. Ultimately, he'd send Lullaby back without the reply to allow himself more time to mull over his own feelings on that matter. There was something almost like Apathy, but it potentially could have been Trauma as well.

By the time he could return to the return letter, another day had passed and he'd sent Little Lady to greet Elibrie with it. Which she did with a cheep and a hopeful reach of her little head. In that time, he'd idly scribbled stick figures and half-blueprints on one corner of the page, as if putting more complicated thoughts down on the paper without thinking about them.

Quote:

It is ok to worry and you shouldn't feel guilty for doing so. I imagine Kesucianth,

a few of the letters of the dragon's name had been written incorrectly the first time and then scribbled over harder with the correct ones as it was obvious he'd checked from her first letter only after he'd written it and had to fix it

Quote:

has them well in claw, though. A baby dragon does not make mistakes and in time I am certain he will help you peel back all of those layers of worry to find out you were stronger than anybody could have guessed.

I hope you make good friends amongst the rest of the Weyrlings. There should be a whole slew of them now, unless Banshidheth's clutch took longer to hatch than I was imagining it would.

-- Juhvek

Meepfur

 

[Meepfur]

Elibrie couldn't help but feel a touch of disappointment when Lullaby returned this time with empty claws, but quickly tucked that away in favor of logic.  Perhaps Juhvek wasn't up to writing that day, or was busy, or any number of other things.  And it was hardly as though she'd been prompt in her own reply, last time.  Whatever the reason, she knew it was a good one, and more than that, she hoped he was alright.  She could only imagine what his day-to-day must be like, as she hesitated to ask directly.  There were certain things she would simply let be, and wait for him to offer up if and when he felt like it.  Particular subjects she would leave be unless he broached them himself, which was why in her first letter she'd not mentioned Kesucianth.  She'd had no idea how he would feel about her Impressing, from when what she gathered that future was now closed to him, nor did she know how his feelings on dragons in general might have been impacted.

If his letter was anything to go by, he at least didn't seem wont to shy from the subject, though she well knew that he might be choosing to leave some things out or skirt around them, much as she was.  Much as she might want to tell him everything, he surely had enough on his mind without her adding to it.  No, while she wouldn't pretend that absolutely everything was sunshine and light and she had not a single care in the world, she would keep it to, well...normal Elibrie worries.  Nothing especially heavy, just what she imagined was more or less what he would expect from her by now, and would continue to make it clear that he was missed - not out of sight, out of mind, which she knew would be among her worries if she were the one so far away.

When Little Lady did eventually appear with a reply, the green was met with much enthusiasm from both Elibrie and her flock (well, maybe not from Chomps) and bid to stick around awhile, if she could.  Once she had a few minutes of free time in the Barracks, she got to work...but not on writing.  Using a bit of polish she'd borrowed from her aunt, she carefully painted Little Lady's claws pink - a terribly silly thing to do, she knew, but that was the point.  She hoped Juhvek might find it amusing, even if only for a moment.  The little flit was then sent home with her pedicure, while it would be another few days before Elibrie could really sit and focus properly on a reply.  In the meantime, she read what she'd received many times over, and even pored over the doodles in the corner, as though they might tell her something more.

This letter, she agonized over slightly less about exactly how to word everything, as she was beginning to get more accustomed to communicating via letter.  Each one got a little bit easier.  Still, it was just before bedtime when she finished, so, aware of the time difference between them, she didn't send Lullaby with it until morning.

Quote:

Dear Juhvek,

Kesucianth will insist that he isn't the most perfect dragon on Pern, since he is just a blue and he wouldn't want to step on anyone's toes, but he's certainly the most perfect dragon for me.  He will want to make sure he looks his best for you when you meet, though, since first impressions are important and all.

He has been helping me keep it all together while I get used to our new life.  I didn't often think this far ahead, but when I did, you and Oranie and Lusialu were all here, too, so it still seems strange in a lot of ways, especially since I barely get to see them and can't see you at all.  Kinyegele and Yunara Impressed, at least, but it's not the same.

Banshidheth's clutch hatched a few days after Anakumath's, so the Barracks are feeling pretty crowded, between the people and the growing dragons.  It would be hard to avoid making friends even if I tried, I'm sure.  Not that I would, but I do still like my old friends just fine.

I imagine it's less crowded where you are, and not so cold.  I hope you're doing well - I only hear little bits and pieces, probably third-hand at best.

- Elibrie

demon_pachabel

 

[demon_pachabel]

"And what are these?" Juhvek asked the little green firelizard upon her return, lifting up one of her little painted feet and giving it a squeeze so he toes splayed. Little Lady sat patiently in his lap as he did so, giving him a cheep and offering him the mental image of being piled upon by a small herd of her fellows while Elibrie painted them. Certainly, his inquisition had been more amused than anything else, having been able to piece things together at the very least.

It was a shame, then, that the little flit had all but chewed off the polish within a few more days as she groomed herself - leaving him to pick pieces of pink from her teeth.


Lullaby would show up just in time to witness Little Lady putting on her best show of begging for Juhvek's breakfast as he ate. Moreso, him actually indulging the little green a bite here and there. She hardly went hungry, of course, but she did have a perverted fascination with bread.

At least this time he'd be prepared enough to send a reply with Lullaby while pretending he had a strong grasp on who some of the people who had been mentioned in Elibrie's letter had been. Certainly, the names were familiar - Kinyegele was a Weyrbrat not too much younger than him - but that didn't mean faces came to him.

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Elibrie,

I'm honored he thinks I am worth the effort of cleaning up for. I should hope I'll be in a state to be half as presentable,

he stared down at his legs that seemed to almost sting from a certain lack of feeling. But he'd not mention his condition in frank terms unless asked for specifics.

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as he is for me.

Hopefully you don't feel as though I have let you down for leaving you there to fend alone with your friends rather than expected company. I know you'd never dare say such a thing. I'd honestly have you be disappointed I wasn't there, than worried.

Unfortunately, it is still rather crowded where I am, though it is notably warmer than High Reaches. Here in a few months I will find this bed absolutely stifling and will be fantasizing about running free and doing cartwheels outside away from it. I fear without your letters between the visits I'd be left with the poor company of only my own thoughts.

--
Juhvek

Meepfur

 

[Meepfur]

Lullaby had, of course, looked on with hungry eyes when he'd arrived in time for breakfast, but being exceedingly polite, hadn't hovered close or outright begged.  Just...looked hopeful.  Whatever came of his not-begging, he was however quite pleased to be sent with something to give to his bonded - she was always especially happy when he came back with something, and he would be showered with extra affection and a special treat for being such a Good Boy.

Her own reply had to wait until another restday this time, but by now that was only two days away.  Knowing he was looking forward to the letters, though, she was a bit antsy about it taking even that long; thoughts of her next letter were often in the back of her mind throughout her daily tasks, though she was careful not to let it distract her from lessons or dull her focus.  She remained quite particular about following rules and meeting expectations, after all, and wouldn't want to find herself reprimanded for being distracted or preoccupied.  As much of a worrier as she was, she'd already invented for herself a seed of concern that she might, for some nebulous reason, be barred from writing to her friend, so even if she hadn't been inclined to always be on her best behavior, she absolutely was now.

She did do a bit of lip-biting and fussing over exactly how to reply to some of what he'd written this time, particularly about how soon he'd be wanting to run free and do cartwheels - which, from what little she'd heard, was unlikely to say the least, and which he surely knew well.  He always had had a tendency to be rather deadpan even face-to-face, so in a letter, it was even trickier to get a read on.  But by a candlemark after breakfast, she had it written, and Lullaby was sent off once again

...although this time, he had a sneaky tagalong who'd gotten tired of being left behind, and was intent on seeing what his older 'brother' was getting up to.  Prrrrrrpt!!  Appearing with a pop right behind Lullaby, Snoops crowed with delight upon seeing Juhvek, and wasted absolutely no time in at least attempting to conduct a thorough inspection.

Quote:

Dear Juhvek,

I don't think you have to worry too much about first impressions - Kesucianth has practically met you already, since he can see all my memories.  He'll be just as pleased to see you as I am, I'm sure, and I'm sure you'll be perfectly presentable anyway...not that we'd object even if you weren't.

Of course you haven't let me down, and I hope you don't think that you have.  There's not a day that goes by that I don't wish you were here, but it's not your fault that you can't be.  I do worrry, but if it helps any, a little less now that we can write.  It was much worse before.  More than anything, I miss you, and I hope they let you come home soon.

Well, I'm glad you're not freezing, at least, and I hope they'll let you have some time outside before long instead of keeping you cooped up.  It's hard enough just staying put in the Barracks some nights, so I can only imagine.  It would be the perfect time to write, if I had the light for it; just lying awake in the dark almost seems like a waste of time, when we have so little of it to ourselves.  Still, I'll try to write as often as I can, since it does both of us some good.

- Elibrie

demon_pachabel

 

[demon_pachabel]

Writing back was a difficult feat when one was trying to keep a firelizard out of their ear - or at least fend off the worst of the tickling. Little Lady, unfortunately, found Snoops, well, snooping endearing and soon enough was lured into similar shenanigans. Much to the annoyance of the others in nearby cots who would be victimized by both it and the noise without much in ways of apologies from the young man.

No letter would return with either visitor that time, but rather several candlemarks later into the day a bit before dinner - which Little Lady almost landed right on top of before she made pleading, begging eyes for bits of from anybody within radius before even relinquishing her missive.

Quote:

Dear Elibrie,

There isn't much to worry about on a day to day basis, so I have plenty of time to spare more than a few thoughts about how you and Kesucianth are doing. If that leads to small ponderances of what worries you may have on my account, I can't help it. I would prefer to not be a burden of worry upon you, yet I am also flattered to know that simply being out of sight hasn't put me out of mind.

Day to day, here, the plans for me to come back shift in little ways. It has already been two months and the sheer boredom already feels more threatening than anything else. You truly are keeping me above the water, metaphorically speaking.

-- Juhvek

Meepfur

 

[Meepfur]

Elibrie had thought little of Snoops' absence - most of her fair tended to flit about on their own business and adventures during the day, the exceptions being Chomps, who was a homebody, and Lullaby, who more often than not was close by unless on an errand.  So it wasn't until the too-curious blue returned chirping with delight and excitedly giving her images of Juhvek that she realized what he'd been up to.  Little rascal!  Instead of scolding him, though, she just shook her head and scritched under his chin.  She missed their friend, too, and she could hardly blame Snoops for darting off to see him, not when she would be more than happy to do so herself.

As both he and Lullaby were empty-clawed, she'd set to using the rest of her morning to practice her embroidery to keep herself busy, then after lunch and a quick catch-up with her sister, had curled up with Kesucianth for a little nap - who'd more than tripled in size, and could easily tuck her under a wing, which was better than any sort of security blanket.  Though she was sleeping a bit better now than she had in the beginning, being a weyrling was exhausting work, so it didn't hurt to get in a little extra rest on their restdays, when they could.

It was an uneventful day, really, at least until a guest arrived at dinner!  Elibrie readily supplied Little Lady with tasty bites of wherry in exhange for what the green carried, and then got so lost in reading, re-reading, and generally mulling over the letter that her dinner was rather cool by the time she remembered to finish it.  Once she had, she rushed back to the Barracks to formulate a reply; she knew her best chance to get it finished before her next rest day was to do it now, and given Juhvek's last line, it felt most urgent to be prompt.  Kesucianth curled around her with a gentle thrum, eyes whirling blue-green as he watched her write, and they consulted back and forth about the writing itself.  In addition to being pleased about the exchange of letters, for it was so very soothing for His and such a source of happiness, he was also very intrigued.  If he had wished to speak with another dragon, no matter how far away, all he would have to do was send them his thoughts, which was undoubtedly quite a bit more efficient and rather lacking in all this suspense.  But there was something very charming about the letter-writing, and the way they became little treasures, tucked away in His' chest of belongings.  He liked it very much.

Once again, Lullaby would deliver the letter come morning - though without a nosy tagalong this time, thank you.

Quote:

Dear Juhvek,

I'm glad at least one of us doesn't have much to worry about from day to day, so I don't mind making up the difference.  I'd promise to try not to worry, since you'd rather I not, but I know I wouldn't be able to keep it, so I hope you'll forgive me. 

It already seems like it's been so much longer than two months especially with as big as Kesucianth is getting - it's hard to believe he could grow so much in so little time.  If everything weren't still covered in snow, I could hardly believe it hasn't been half a Turn.  It feels like it's been that long at least. They do keep us quite busy, of course, with lessons and drills and chores and then more of the same, then all over again the next day, so I'll admit that boredom has yet to be an issue, even if it is an awful lot of geography and more geography right now.  But no matter how busy we are, we're never so busy that you're out of mind, and I'm always thinking about our next letter until I get a chance to write it.  High Reaches just doesn't feel quite as much like home without you here.

- Elibrie

demon_pachabel

 

[demon_pachabel]

Little Lady was certainly delighted to see her father again so soon, peeping and cheeping for the blue before flopping over onto one side. Lullaby was rewarded for his efforts with scritches (and another nibble from his breakfast, given the timing) as Juhvek read over the letter he'd received. But as before, he'd not reply to it immediately.

His day was so full of various check-ins and other engagements, despite him claiming his days were full of nothing, that it would almost be a full sevenday before he'd have much to write about at all. His days were less engaging than the day to day with a baby dragon, after all, and after nearly three months the extent of what he should expect for his life moving forward was all but written in stone. Bodies were strange, they said, but it was more likely than not.

The slew of visitors he received between letters also did much to take the worst of his burdens off of his mind - mostly because he couldn't hide them from his mother.

Little Lady would be waiting on Elibrie's cot around lunchtime when she finally returned with a reply, having made every attempt to remake the young woman's bed into a proper sleeping spot for a little green.

Quote:

Dear Elibrie,

This last sevenday has admittedly not been the most exciting so I'm afraid I don't have much to really talk about. The highlights were a visit from my mother and sister - I imagine my brother would have come as well but I hear his lifemate suffered severe injury so I do not blame him for putting his dragon first.

Do you imagine Kesucianth will be a large dragon by the time he's fully grown? I'm unsure how well you can really tell it in a young dragon, but I've heard those who see dragons up close on a day to day basis seem to be able to tell.

I do wish I had more exciting things to write to you about, but I simply do the same things from day to day and as they are they're simply not interesting enough to regale you with. The healers say I am making fair enough progress, though, after which we can move onto the next step. Not that we're all entirely sure what that will be yet.

Hopefully something that gets me closer to coming home.

-- Juhvek.

Meepfur

 

[Meepfur]

After the last two letters had arrived fairly quickly, Elibrie couldn't help but worry as days went by without another.  It was a silly worry, she knew - obviously he was just busy and there was no real reason to fret, but fret she did regardless.  It wasn't enough to detract from her attention and efforts in her daily tasks and lessons, but it was there in the back of her mind, as she wondered how Juhvek was and just why he hadn't sent a reply yet.  Could something be wrong?  Could she have said something amiss?  No matter how obvious and simple it should have been to assume that he just lacked the time, she was well-practiced at worrying over silly things.

Kesucianth did help her to keep it in check, though, soothing over the worst of it so that it wouldn't become a preoccupation or distraction, and always offering up sunnier thoughts about why there was no letter yet today.  When eventually the day came that Little Lady snuck onto Elibrie's cot while she was at lunch, Elibrie was both delighted and relieved, and scooped the little green up for plenty of cuddles and smooches.  Chomps had been less pleased by her arrival, but had kept his displeasure to grumbling and glaring from his napping spot on the pillow.

Settling on the cot herself, Elibrie read over the letter and quickly set to replying while she knew she had the time.  It would be ready in time for Little Lady to take it with her, though she'd have Lullaby as a tagalong, as the blue had come to quite enjoy his little visits (and the high likelihood of snacks).

Quote:

Dear Juhvek,

I'm glad you've had visitors, even if I'm a little jealous of them, since Kesucianth and I can't be among them.  I am sorry to hear about your brother's dragon, though, and I hope he's able to make a full recovery, and that your brother is well aside from that.

I'm really not sure if Kesucianth is going to be particularly big for his color or not.  He's longer head to tail than some of his brothers, but more of it seems to be neck and tail than it does for the others.  I'm sure someone who has more experience with growing dragons would be able to say, but I can't.  All I know is he seems to get bigger every day, though he's more sleek than anything.  One of his brothers is, well...a little chunky.

I don't mind hearing about the boring things, as long as I'm hearing something.  Nothing here is especially exciting, to be honest, just busy.  Lessons, chores, drills, exercises - we certainly go to bed tired.  The dragons have been doing a lot of wing exercises to build up their strength so they'll be ready to fly when the time comes, and I know once we get there things will start to move faster and be more exciting, if exciting is the right word for it.  Dangerous may be a bit more appropriate.

I'm happy to hear the healers think you're progressing well, and I hope that they'll decide what's next sooner rather than later.  I know I'll feel much better once you're home.

demon_pachabel

 

[demon_pachabel]

Juhvek was regaled with many mental images of kisses and cuddles upon her return, as well as the letter, making sure that her boy got to appreciate all of them - though he was not a firelizard and knew such things were not actually meant for him. It was nice, for what secondhand affection it was.

Quote:

Elibrie,

If it makes you feel any better, you are the only one who sends letters and I am lucky enough to get to read them again when things are too miserable here. While I don't know the new Weyrlingmaster well, I do wonder if when you and Kesucianth are big enough to fly with company if he wouldn't let you tag along with one of my sisters to visit. It may be wishful thinking, however, and I hope to be back before that is an option.

A day full of things can certainly be monotonous. So far, the healers are mostly trying to help me adjust to the way my life will be once I am able to leave. A few tools, a few adjustments. I should be able to live mostly the way I did before once I recover, give or take a few things. I'd like to come home soon, but if I got to make all of the decisions around here it would probably be a disaster.

I never thought I'd miss Weyr Food as much as I do.

--
Juhvek

Little Lady would arrive a little after supper with the letter and look all the sadder for having missed noms to beg for.

Meepfur

 

[Meepfur]

Having had to wait for the previous letter, Elibrie had been determined not to let herself expect another one soon - and she'd certainly not expected another the same day! Little Lady might have missed supper, but the young bluerider was more than happy to bathe her in still more affection and offer treats from her pocket. It might not be as exciting as dinner scraps, but hopefully it would do! Sadly, that was all she could do before evening chores, and though the green was as always welcome to stay and play or cuddle with the boys, she'd have no letter to return to her bonded with. It wasn't until after chores that Elibrie even had time to read what she'd been sent, and she did so with a pang.

'When things get too miserable here.' It was the first he'd given any open indication that he suffered from much of anything more than boredom, and while she'd known there must have been more to it than that, she'd not wanted to push. She was grateful that he felt comfortable mentioning it even in passing as he did, though it did unleash a new torrent of worry. Kesucianth was quick to hum it into subsiding, but nonetheless, she rushed through her bath so that she could eke out a little bit more time to write before bed.

Quote:

Dear Juhvek,

If that's the case, I'll have to tell Oranie to write as well. I know she misses you, too, and I'm sure she'd be happy to write. Then you'll have twice as many letters to read. I'd ask if there's anything else we could send to help, but I'm sure your family brings you things like that...but the offer's there, whatever it's worth. I hope you'll be back long before we start making trips, but if you're not, I'll be sure to ask. Maybe if we work extra hard, they'll actually let us.

I'm glad the adjustments have turned out to be simple, from the sound of it. I don't think I'll ever stop wishing I could do something more to help than write letters, but I'm grateful it's something. I doubt things would really be a disaster there if they let you make decisions - I'm sure they're doing a good job, of course, but you'd not be such a bad person to put in charge of something.

Weyr food isn't such a strange thing to miss, I think, unless it's burnt soup you're craving.

- Elibrie

The thought of asking to visit - albeit in the distant future when it was even a faint possibility - was quite intimidating, but for Juhvek, she'd do it. If it came to that, anyway...she was still holding out hope that he'd be home long before then. As she had on other occasions after writing a letter late in the day, she waited until morning to send Lullaby off with it, pressing a little kiss to his nose that he would pass obligingly to Juhvek in the form of a boop.

demon_pachabel

 

[demon_pachabel]

He'd really been trying to not get to a point where his letters all became the same facts rehashed over and over again - his day to day wasn't exciting new stuff all the time and Juhvek couldn't help but fear a little that he'd eventually become boring if he allowed it. So when Elibrie replied so promptly it was likely a surprise that he took not one sevenday, but two to reply to it at last. Initially, it had been accidental. This physical therapy was taking up more of his time, and talks of a bigger part of his future had been distracting, to say the least.

Honestly, he hadn't been sure how much of it to even pass on in a letter when it finally came. Little Lady arrived fairly early in the morning with the letter and had immediately appealed for cuddles and playtime before she'd even relinquished it.

Quote:

Dear Elibrie,

I apologize for not writing - there has been a lot happening here that has admittedly split my focus from any one thing. I see my mother and sisters on occasion and the company is nice.

Though he pointedly kept from mentioning that his grim attitude about his state of being had a way of coloring such affairs. He was so coiled up with complicated feelings that he couldn't even put them into words for a mindhealer. He'd needed more time with a mindhealer than he'd have expected from the outside, but Juhvek made a point to not mention that either.

Quote:

I miss more familiar faces. Outside of the healers, people come and go so quickly here that I don't really feel too much of a camaraderie with them by the time they get to go on to better things. It is stable enough, but it can also be horrendously lonely to not see the people who love and care about you. I wonder if this is how holdborn riders feel when they are so far away from their families.

Is this how you feel at least?

-- Juhvek

Meepfur

 

[Meepfur]

To receive a reply within a day or two was always a pleasant surprise, and though she knew better than to expect them to appear so quickly, the hope was always there.  A sevenday was hardly unusual, so while she did worry a bit - he had, after all, mentioned miserable in his last letter, and she couldn't help but dwell on it - she did her best not to let it have too much space in in her thoughts.  It helped to have lessons and Kesucianth to focus on; they were preparing for his first flight, and while her bonded would be doing most of the work, she needed to be ready to steady and guide him if necessary.  But then another day passed, and then another, and with each one, her concern grew.  She knew there were all sorts of good reasons he'd not been able to write yet, that he could very well just be busy, or that he might just not feel like writing...although that possibility prompted a pang of sadness, so she hoped that wasn't the case.  Still, if it was, it was perfectly understandable...

She turned over the possibilities and worries at night most of all, when there was nothing else to focus on, and it made her miss the days when Kesucianth had been small enough to climb up and cuddle with her.  But finally, eventually, Little Lady arrived one morning with a letter in her claws.  Elibrie was delighted to see her, and the little green would receive all the cuddles and attention she asked for, even if she was practically dying to see the letter.  Her delight, however, didn't last long, and she sank back down onto her cot as she read the short letter.

He was lonely, and it broke her heart to know it because she couldn't do anything about it but what she already was, and that wasn't enough.  She wanted to see him, and hug him, and actually talk to him, but she couldn't leave the Weyr.  Why did he have to be so far away?  Why wouldn't they just let him come home already?  She had to stew in those thoughts and others like them until she was able to write a reply, and first she had to get through a whole day's worth of chores and lessons.  But when she reread it the next morning before sending it, she decided it was all wrong and she needed to start again - which meant it would have to wait until the next day, when she would have more time for herself.

She felt rather guilty for the delay, but at least this way she'd have the time for a proper reply - and to write it outside in the cool spring air, with Kesucianth curled around her and humming softly for comfort.  This was the most her feelings had troubled her in quite some time, and he ached with her, though he knew it was only natural.  He could only imagine how he would feel if one of his close clutchmates were hurt and so far away, but even then, it would have been easy to converse with them.  Elibrie could only write, and wait, and write again.  It was better than nothing, yet it seemed to make time pass even more slowly, even as Kesucianth himself continued to grow, evidence that it hadn't actually slowed down at all.

Quote:

Dear Juhvek,

I'm sorry to hear that you're so lonely, though I can only imagine that I would be, too.  I am.  It's not the same, I know - I have Kesucianth and Oranie and everyone else here, but sometimes I am lonely.  From the start, the other weyrlings have all been so happy with their dragons and their new lives, but mine still doesn't feel right.  I love Kesucianth, I do, more than anything, but I miss you.  I hate that I can't see you or really talk to you, or do anything to help fix it.

I don't miss my family anymore, not the way I used to.  I still worry about them sometimes, but I suspect they don't worry about me.  Oranie and I might as well have run away, after all, so even if we'd wanted to go back they wouldn't have us.  I think that's when I was loneliest before, when I realized I couldn't go home, but at least I had Oranie, and we had you to look after us.

I hope they let you come home soon.  I know they must have their reasons, but it can't be good for you to be unhappy, either.

- Elibrie

She hoped it wasn't too much, that responding to his woes with her own wouldn't come across poorly.  She just wanted him to know how important he was, that just because he wasn't here didn't mean he was forgotten about, or that the whole Weyr had moved on from what had happened.  Maybe most of it had, but a few of them hadn't, and that had to count for something, right?

x demon_pachabel