It had been about a week since the events at the Pale Citadel happened. Of course he and Usagi had discussed a bit of what happened and the jashinists a bit closer to the time, but the mental exhaustion from having to deal with them in the first place prompted the two of them to agree to talk more about it at a later time. The white haired man who lost an ally in his fight with the jashinists came to the office. He figured now was the right time to do such, and maybe even help her out a bit with paper work that she was probably doing...maybe doing....who knows. As the man approached the door of her office, he would knock on it a few times before calling out. "Usagi?" He questioned, unsure if she was even in her office in the first place.
The Witch of the Valley Rank:Sandaime Tanikage 磁気 | Classes:Scholar | Scholar | Bloodline | 力 | Body Rank:S+ 勇 | Elements:Water,Earth,Wood
Usagi sat at her desk, hunkered over a mess of papers and a few empty sake bottles. Her cheeks were flushed, but she was staring intently at the sheets of notes that were covered with the unmistakable scrawl of Fuuinjutsu formula. The Kage rested her head in her hand and gripped her fingers close to her scalp lightly as she tried to think. What’d she missed in her fight with that girl? How could she stop that cultist from using the same thing to escape her seal? Was it an issue with the Fuuin array itself? Too many questions buzzed around Usagi’s head, but were only a part of the flood of thoughts that were related to the Jashinist attack.
Before she could even pick one to start on, someone knocked at her door. “Yeah, come in.” she said absently without looking up from her papers. She took a drink while she moved a sheet, looking underneath it to the paper under it. It wasn’t until she heard a voice that she was pulled from her thoughts. “Oh! Hey Iksin.” Her face lightened as the man entered her office. She slid the papers to the side into one pile and she gestured for the Ichibi host to take a seat. “What brings you here? Would you like a drink? Are you holding up okay after… y’know… everything.”
As Iksin opened the door to Usagi's call for him to come in he looked around. 'Yup, still messy.' He thought to himself, stepping in and shutting the door rather gently behind him. She was in thought for a moment, seemingly hadn't even realized it was Iksin who had knocked and asked to come in. However she seemed much calmer once she noticed at least. Her intense focus on something or other wasn't going to go left unnoticed by the man. "Ah, nothing to drink for me." He said to her, taking the seat she offered among her mess of an office. She asked him if he was holding up okay after what happened. A rather gloomy look grew across the white haired man's face.
"It's tough to answer that. Not really yes and not really no. That's actually why I came here. I wanted to check on you as well." He said, placing his hand upon her desk and lightly tapping it for some reason. Perhaps just something he was doing out of some sort of habit? Maybe to calm his nerves? "Well, I can start though. I lost an ally I wasn't expecting to lose. I didn't know her for very long, hadn't even been a week. In fact she had been the one to approach me, she wanted to help me. Not like Aldrich who's sworn to me currently. I know she knew that she could die, I knew she could die, she was a monster after all. I'm sure all her life she had been prepared for death for the most part. But, I don't know. Actually seeing it happen kind of, well, I guess shocked me." Iksin explained, the tapping on the desk stopped and then his hands would come together. Fingers locking together as he covered his mouth and went into thought. "I'm not sure how 'right' it is to bring these beasts into battle alongside me if I'm just going to watch them die." He paused, looking towards Usagi for a moment. "Well, what about you?" His movement into asking that he hoped would show Usagi he wasn't really seeking advice from her about that particularly. At least not yet, he was simply telling her his thoughts, what's been on his mind. Perhaps even letting her know that she could do the same.
The Witch of the Valley Rank:Sandaime Tanikage 磁気 | Classes:Scholar | Scholar | Bloodline | 力 | Body Rank:S+ 勇 | Elements:Water,Earth,Wood
Usagi wordlessly poured Iksin a drink and slid the cup over the desk, despite his initial refusal. She knew it was going to be one of those conversations. Usagi was never one for formalities, but sometimes being in the Kage seat kept her on edge. But when it was just her and Iksin, she felt she could loosen up more than she usually was. So she sat back, crossing her leg over the other, while she sipped from her drink. The Kage watched him carefully, listening to his confession. If she had to guess, Iksin hadn’t lost anyone before. At least not anyone that he had a bond with like his companions. “Being in that kind of position is hard.” She said after a thoughtful silence. “It’s something I think about every time I go into combat with the shinobi here. I consider them my family, y’know. But the thing to remember is that the ones that choose to follow you on their own, like they did, it means they believe in what you’re trying to accomplish or stand for. It’s kind of a silent agreement that they’re gonna put their lives on the line for you, and vice versa. And should you fail, the ones behind you pick up the torch and continue from where you left off.”
Usagi paused and took a sip of her drink as a small smile formed on her face. “If I remember from my time spent in Konoha and Uzu, they call that ‘the Will of Fire.’ It’s kinda sappy, but it gets the job done.” The blonde woman finished her drink before leaning forward to pour another. “Being Kage isn’t really my cup of tea. So I don’t know if I really believe in that Will of Fire stuff.” She said without looking up from the contents of the sake bottle. She was still smiling, but the look in her eyes held a shadow of… sorrow, perhaps? Being a leader, and being responsible for the safety of others, always left a bad taste in her mouth. Especially with how she was chosen, being solely from her bloodline and nothing else. But she was in the seat now, so she might as well get comfortable. So Usagi shook her head and returned her gaze back to Iksin, the more genuine air returning to it. “But I like to think I can provide a space for people to look out for each other.”
Usagi stalled answering Iksin’s question long enough. What about her? She had to think about it a little bit. “I think… I think my opponent at the Citadel shook me up more than anything else.” The Kage admitted solemnly. “I’d been doing my best to fight her, that much is true. But once it was all over… it really hit me that she was just a child. Powerful? Yes, immeasurably. But still a child.” Just thinking about the power that Tabe had made Usagi’s skin erupt into goosebumps. “When I was about her age, I spent some time with a group that turned out to be a crazy world ending cult too. I managed to escape, but some of the things I saw still haunt me. Jashinism is far worse than that, and I can’t imagine the things that girl had to endure at such a young age.” Usagi didn’t notice, but she’d been clenching her fist hard enough for the knuckles to turn white. “And I almost killed her, Iksin. It was bonechilling…”
Iksin listened to Usagi's words rather carefully, as she poured him a drink. To which Iksin, without thinking while she was talking grabbed and took a sip from before sitting the glass back down. It made sense, that was actually how he felt about it for the most part. They both knew what was going on, unfortunately it didn't make it any less hard really. "Yeah, thank you Usagi. I think I needed to hear that." He said to her. Thinking for a moment before adding on something else. "I think, giving a name to something abstract and important like that devalues it. I'll probably not call those sort of things Will of Fire or anything of the sort myself." He chuckled a bit. Before Usagi finally got to answering his actual question about how she was doing. Her words hitting his ears, and he could tell the turmoil the words themselves caused. If thinking back on those things did that, then he couldn't imagine how it felt in the moments after. When the realizations were first hitting her.
Iksin took another sip from his cup and looked at Usagi. Honestly, he was lost as far as what he felt like he should say to her. Her feelings were rooted in her experiences. He was sure there was nothing he could really say to her to change that turmoil inside her. However, this was also a place where he felt like he knew Usagi would appreciate the truth of his feelings involving this stuff. Maybe it would help just hearing his words? Who knew. "This isn't going to make you feel much better. But we're honestly no better than them in my opinion." Iksin said, plainly. "I don't mean in actuality. Jashinism, World Ending Cults, obviously they are out for bad things. But morally, we're pretty bad ourselves." He continued, to assure her that he wasn't saying that they were literally as bad as Jashinism. "I knew it was bad from experiences. Just seeing it happen in a few places. Seeing ninja squads, and other sorts. But it didn't hit me until I actually became a ninja myself. The Ninja Academy's minimum sign up age is 8. A lot of kids usually graduate after about 2 years and become Genin. Perhaps we don't send them off into giant world deciding wars right then, but at that point they're already signed up to take on potentially fatal missions. They could get sent to take on some bandits and die. If they excel at being a shinobi, they're promoted and take on even more dangerous missions. With the way our system works right now? It's very possible for an eight year old to be taking on missions at the same level as us....given to them by us. We do it for a good reason I think, but I don't think it changes much."
Iksin sat back in his chair, sighing as he drank the rest of the drink that was in the cup he had. Placing it down before sighing and looking at Usagi again. "Don't get me wrong though. I'm of the opinion that it's fine. The strong are the strong no matter what their ages are. However, from observing the jashinist I fought. From what I know about Jashinism. The child you fought, the girl you almost killed? If she wasn't just as bad at the others then she'd have already been killed by the jashinists themselves. She knows what she's doing, she is in their upper ranks. To think otherwise, as a ninja, would be a little hypocritical."
The Witch of the Valley Rank:Sandaime Tanikage 磁気 | Classes:Scholar | Scholar | Bloodline | 力 | Body Rank:S+ 勇 | Elements:Water,Earth,Wood
The Kage chewed on Iksin’s words. She was silent as she took another sip of her drink. Of course he was right, after all. The indoctrination of children into the shinobi world was something Usagi was firmly against. It was too late for her, as she’d been exposed to it all since she was young. But children shouldn’t go through the kind of stuff that her and her kind had gone through. Usagi just let out a sigh as she thought about the futility of the shinobi system. Eight years old is far too old to decide to put your life on the line. She had a feeling Iksin knew what she was thinking about. “It’s… hard to rework that system from the ground up.” She eventually replied, loosely twirling her cup as she held it with the tips of her fingers. “Some of the elders here are stubborn, too stubborn to make changes to tradition. ‘The sooner we can strengthen our military, the stronger we can make it.’” She said with a disinterested roll of her eyes. “They don’t see how suffocating it can be.”
Usagi downed her drink before refilling her and Iksin’s cups. The woman thought silently for a second. “Iksin, do you… do you think that Takumi woman has a point?” The blonde Kage rested her cheek against her free hand and made eye contact with her Sannin. “That we’re just violent in nature, and trying to hide with our societal laws and stuff? Like you said, we allow people to join the military before they even hit double digits. Teach them how to harness powerful stuff like the forces of nature, just to have them fight other children.” Usagi paused for a drink. “So d’you think there might be some truth to what she says? It’s just hidden deep under tradition?” Usagi pursed her lips and tapped her finger to her cheekbone. "Kogarashi, these Jashinists, TORNA out to the East, even the samurai... there's too many different factions that wanna see the world burn to think that that crazy cat lady doesn't have a point."
It was true, rebuilding a system like the shinobi system was difficult. So many different things already in place, so many different people who refuse to let things go. The worst part about it being that it seems so many people just won't die on old age, so they're around for so long that it seems never ending. There's always going to be opposition to change, Iksin knew that much at least. However that matter was simply something that he brought up to prove the point that the jashinists they each fought were probably no different than the shinobi there in regards to them knowing what they were doing at the very least. With that subjact matter done, Usagi asked Iksin a rather important question. How he felt about what Takumi spoke of. Was she right? Although he would wait for her to finish her explanation of her own thoughts...Iksin already knew the answer to that question. As she finished her thoughts, Iksin's answer would come quickly and firmly.
"Absolutely." His choice of word to clarify that he thought she had a point, and the quickness of his answer meant to display to Usagi that Iksin agreed to some extent with Takumi in this situation. "Perhaps hidden by tradition as you say, but for me, as a person who had barely been bound by traditions and the like in the first place? I think that it's very obvious. I honestly think that if Takumi wasn't trying to destroy the world in order to rebuild it I would probably get along with her quite well." He added to the conversation at hand, seemingly a bit more comfortable talking about this than he was talking about the shinobi society and traditional stuff. "But that's sort of where my sight of her point ends. I think she has a misconception of how everything would work out for her. Too many stops on her ride, and at one of them she's going to get pushed off the wagon." Iksin's thoughts coming together in his own head. Comparing the jashinist woman's actions to that of riding and expecting to get somewhere. The biggest one is probably method. Actually the most curious thing for me, how she came up with the idea that if she helps Jashin destroy the world she can attain divine power and rebuild it herself. I think she's been lied to, maybe even by Jashin himself. Jashin is far from known for rebuilding of all things. Why would such a destructive god even allow her to do such a thing? Even if he were to do that, would he not just come back to destroy her created world anyways? Then looking past that, if we were to say she succeeds in her goal? Not only succeeds in her goal, but Jashin leaves her newly rebuilt world be. A world where people are basically the same as now, except not bound by societal ideals? That might last for quite some time, but unless she herself stamps out all forms of attempts at law then it will eventually become the exact same world she hated. What she wanted to rebuild in the first place. She'd be stuck in a never ending cycle of her world becoming what she hated and having to destroy it in order to rebuild it again. It isn't like society, laws, and all this stuff was imparted on us the moment we came into existence. Those things grew over time, when a semblance of free will exists within people groups of like minds make decisions based on what they feel is best. Those things exist even among the worst of people. It's not like Jashinists go around killing each other often. Groups of Bandits and Thieves don't steal from one another often either. When they do, usually they're left on their own. It's just nature. Even normal animals are like that. A pack of wolves? Pride of lions? They might not have out society, laws, written language, anything like that, but they have their own rules within their groups as well. To think that rebuilding a world can fix nature itself is foolish." Iksin said, with his bit of a rant ending he sighed. Sure he was fine with talking about it, but it was tiring. Dealing with foolish people who believe something inherently bad is outright for the best.
The Witch of the Valley Rank:Sandaime Tanikage 磁気 | Classes:Scholar | Scholar | Bloodline | 力 | Body Rank:S+ 勇 | Elements:Water,Earth,Wood
The Kage listened closely. She suspected that Iksin’s immediate acceptance of part of Taukim’s point of view would put some people on edge. But Usagi just smiled and let him speak. It wasn’t like it was unheard of. From what she knew about Iksin, it wasn’t too much of a surprise. And she knew he wasn’t going to turn into an apocalypse hunting freak, either. It was logical, and she couldn’t fault him for that. She just slowly worked on her drink while Iksin spoke. Part of her was curious as to what Shukaku thought, too. After all, the Bijuu were creations of Jahsin himself. The blonde woman wondered if the Ichibi had any opinions. But he wasn’t who she was talking to, nor who she was truly interested in hearing from out of the pair of demon and host. “I wonder if something happened to her to make her feel that way. It’s kind of a sad thing to think about.” Usagi eventually commented. “The world can be a hard place to live in sometimes, and it can make people feel like nothing matters. Or that humanity is evil, or that the universe is uncaring. That kind of thinking can twist the morals of even the most noble man.”
“But I feel like that doesn’t mean we shouldn’t have hope for the world, either. Yanno? Not every sailor can see the horizon through the squall, but that doesn’t mean it isn’t there.” Usagi could feel her mind wandering back to her days in TORNA. Her face, even for the most brief of moments, would convey worry or guilt over what and who she’d left behind. Part of her, deep down, wished she could reconcile with them. But the louder part of her brain yelled at her, reminding her it must’ve been too late, so she shook it off. “People tend to have this misconception that the universe doesn’t care. It’s so vast, impossibly so. And life on our own planet is so small in comparison, how could it possibly care about us and what happens? But I feel like that’s the wrong approach. I think that we are the tools by which the universe cares. In the same way that our brains think and our hearts feel, human beings are proof that the universe can care. And so if you choose to care and to love, then that means the universe cares and loves too. But if you don’t, then it means the universe doesn’t. It can be a fickle thing, but not a lot of people go through life without meeting some aspect of love that the universe has for us. So that’s what I mean when I say it’s upsetting that it seems like Takumi has never met one of those instruments of the universe. Her, or the other Jashinists, if they’ve been driven to planetary extinction as they have.”
Usagi finished her drink once again as she let her words hang in the air. A bashful look appeared on her face as she realized the silence between her and Iksin. “Sorry for the rant, I’m not entirely sure where that came from.” She chuckled nervously as she waved a hand in front of her face. Usagi groaned and rose to her feet, stretching her arms above her head with a grunt. “I need to get out of this office, I think, so I’m gonna grab some food. Why don’t you join me? After all, there’s very few things that are more human than eating.”
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