What's the use...

[CrimsonxXxSolace]

what is the use of following rules anymore...when it's always my fault?  

[Kogru]

rules are to "keep us in line". blah. really, rules are things so that the old people have a reason to yell b***h and complain >_>.  

[K1T3]

if we follow the rules and we get blamed for it. we should feel proud that we didn't stoop tot he level of those who didn't follow them in teh 1st place.  

[Sotur]

rules are meant to be followed, but yes, sometimes u need to bend and/or break them bcs said rules can be ridiculous. i guess it all comes down to what type of rule u r talking about. if it's a 'reasonable' rule, or a 'ridiculous' rule.  

[CrimsonxXxSolace]

I feel like a nothing....it doesn't even matter anymore....even if i do it, he's going to yell at me...so what's that use of following them anymore. He's wasting his breath yelling at me for following the rules....I just really want to know why he's always does this to me....what is wrong with me???  

[Sotur]

ok, perhaps if u were a bit more detailed....if u don't want to, that's perfectly fine, but if u expanded more on the problem, maybe we could come up with more accurate suggestions/advice  

[CrimsonxXxSolace]

I'm person who has always followed the rule. I've always done everything that I have too. But i keep getting yelled at for everything that my sister doesn't do. We've both got our set of chores, but as if my sister (who is 15 years old) was a retard, she won't do them. And I get yelled at for them...and when i make a tab to remind her, i get yelled at from my father...

On top of that, I have no clue why he doesn't freaken trust me. I was going to a choir concert that I was in and he yelled at me and basically saying (not straight out) that he knew that i was just going to do something illegal. I know that it's parent's right to worry about their kids, but I'm 17 years old and I'm not that kind of person. But yet every time i step out of the house it's as if I'm the biggest trouble maker alive and bound to get hand cuff or something. He yells at me not not always being home and then if I'm always home he yells at me for always being home. Nothing I do satisfies him, everything i do i get in trouble for.

I'm 17, i know who i am, and what i want to do. I can make my choices and I'm not easily pressured into doing anything i don't want to. My friends know that I'm not easily pressure and they respect me, if they smoke they'll know that why can't convince me to smoke becuase it's my choice and they won't pressure me into doing these things.

I don't even hang out much with my friends and most of the time we're at their house(adult supervision...although it's not like we're going to have sex and drugs there)

It's just driving me nuts...I'm the one that gets yelled at all the time in the house. And it just hurt, you know...to see that I've always done everything just to get his attention, to get some praise...and i've never ever gotten one. It hurts to see that my other siblings gets his praise so easily without even trying and what do i get? Nothing....it's like I'm wasting my time trying to grasp something that will never come....trying to make orange juice out of cabbage...I'm just lost all hopes to even getting his approval and trying to follow the rules...when everything i do is something bad in his eyes....he hates me...and i feel like he's not even part of my family....it's never felt that way and you can just picture watching all of my other friends with their fathers and you standing there just staring out in space and wondering, Where is he?
 

[Sotur]

well, i'll admit i can't really relate, my parents, it's true, were never like that. but i did get yelled at for what my sis did, and didnt do. i finally got the courage to face them and let them know that i was being responsible, doing things right, making correct decision, etc. as they are different ppl, i can't assure that it'll turn out for the best, but maybe u should tell them, show them that u r doing things right. u can even ask them what have u done, if anything, for them not to trust u. as parents they should believe in u and trust u, if they don't it's bcs something happened that made that change. but they shouldn't stop trusting u for no reason at all. also, if u choose to face them, use ur age as a weapon. tell them, remind them [as some use the excuse that they still view u as a child] that u r 17 years old, a perfectly capable young adult who knows how to do things right and IS DOING THEM RIGHT. don't compare to ur sis, tho. but tell them that what they are yelling u for is her responsability, that u took care of urs, and stuff like that.

i guess b4 saying all of that i should have asked: have u ever tried confronting them about this?  

[CrimsonxXxSolace]

My father doesn't listen...he thinks he's the head of the family and he will not listen to anyone or anything...He won't explain anything too...It's just a 'you're wrong' or 'no way', never are 'no because....'.

For whatever reason he will not say, but even if he's doing this because he cares for me, it's hurting me and making me want to rebel against it. It's just soo hopeless with living in this house.....

i hate myself for trying to be someone that he will see only to realize that no matter how hard i try he's never gonna see me. I won't ever hear him praise me or anything....makes me realize that there's no hope.  

[Sotur]

i really can't think of much to say that i haven't already said. sorry i'm of no better use. and this is probably cheesy, hard to believe, etc. but there's hope. little as it may be. eventually it'll get better. problem is always the long-a** time it takes, but it'll get better. just do good in school, don't do anything stupid just for the hell of rebelling [i figure u would't. so far u seem much smarter than that]. and when u can, get a job, gather enough money, and leave. i know it's easier said than done, but it's an option. u can always try renting an apartment with a friend, that way rent is split and it becomes slightly easier to manage. i've never done this myself, thankfully i haven't had the need to, but my bro did and he's managing [he decided to move out, no special reason to it aside form being closer to college and work]. maybe that'll work for ya  

[CrimsonxXxSolace]

I believe he hates me---i know that HATE is a very strong word, but that's how I think....  

[Kogru]

Feh!! Your father needs a good kick in the a**, or some surgery to get that damn stick removed from up it. Feh, my mom is like that... but i tell her to shut the heck up... of course i get in more trouble, but i fight back =].

I have gotten decent grades alll year, and i have really good friends (some do drugss... yes... and alcohol... but i don't). I told her i was gay earlier this year... and now everytime i leave the house i'm out having sex, or getting drugged up in her mind. I got ONE F... and she's flipping out. bleh. pisses me off.

Your 17, on year, and your outie. Come to NJ =] it's fun here <3.

my advice, stick it out, ignore what he says, and go out anyways. turn your cell off so he can't call, leave a note saying EXACTLY where you are... and leave it at that.