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Why is it that the more we think about something the more it seems to escape us.
Try this... Look up "Stool Pidgen". Then say it 15 times. Does it still mean the same. If you say no then I've made my point.

Why is love the same thing to so many people but to the rest, the more you think about it, the more you get it.

The more you think about the person you're "in love" with the farther you fall into that sea. The more you realize that the person in question is absolutely Perfect or Imperfect.

I fall into that perfect zone. I can't get him out of my mind. All I think about is him and how much I just want to see him and tell him how I feel. Words escape me though everytime I even try. And I've tried so many damn times. It's just so damn hard. Why Is that... It's so hard to say what we mean and when we get to that point that we know what we want to say we can't find the right words AGAIN!

Now on that note let's bring up something else... I'm finally afraid. My ex is moving back next month. (If you don't know that story just know this he's a psycho who abused me for a couple of years) Well I'm afraid of him trying to get me back and finding out im taken and tracking down my b/f. I don't want to tell him i'm afraid of this because i know he's just going to put on this "I'm not that easy to hurt...blah blah blah Mr. Macho somthing that you're not going to pay any attention to because you're rolling your eyes" persona and then just leave it at that. Almost like it makes no differance that I wake up at night screaming because I dream that he's dead. The last time I thought about calling my b/f but it was 3 something in the morning and i was worried about waking up someone and his mother getting upset at me for it. I wonder if he's even worried that i'm this afraid. Probably not. Even this I have a problem telling him about. Because I know that damn persona of his will come out and be ******** egotistial.
So guess what i'm going.... That's right I'm learning how to disable anyone with just a couple of hits. And to answer your question: I don't honestly think he'll try to come to my house. He knows he's not welcome but i'm still going to keep a sword or gun (i'll take my pick) nearby.


*More to be added as I feel