So when I get home tonight I'm going to throw away at least two pairs of shoes. I mean why hold onto them when they cause me so much pain? They're not even that cute. I do need to buy new sandals this weekend since this will be 4 pairs of shoes I've had to throw away in the last 2 weeks. My favorite blue sandals broke, you know the ugly ones that I stole from my brother? I literally almost cried and I didn't actually throw them away since Mom wants to see if she can find them on the Internet.
Anyways, enough about shoes...how has everyone's life been? Mine has been good. I was a little sick earlier this week but you know work tomorrow and schoolwork and all that. I'm probably going to be up late tonight. Bummer right? Currently I'm procrastinating on my homework and waiting for my class to start in about 30 minutes.
Last night wasn't the best though come to think of it and I know that Tyler and M-chan have already heard me moan about it so I ask them to please just bear with me. I'm taking this online class and I have been totally neglecting it, meaning that I haven't done any of the readings or listened to any of the lectures. So I show up to class yesterday and thought I'd be out in like 20 minutes or so. We had a test....which took 4 hours since we had to watch Juno beforehand.
I'm bringing dinner next time. (Totally forgot to eat lunch that day.) I wonder how I did, I know I bombed the last essay since I wasn't sure what that theory was about. I knew it had something to do with perception, but that's about it. The movie was good though. mrgreen Pregnancy scares me by the way and irrationally so. I totally had this fleeting fear that I was pregnant today rationally knowing that it is physically impossible for that to happen right now.
I hope when I'm married I won't have the same fear since it'd then be a constant one...I don't know, I don't think it'll bother me as much just because it's more socially acceptable and I'll have a husband and what not to share the responsibility. Still hopefully it'll be quite a while before I'm actually pregnant.
Okay, enough about irrational fears...have I said anything about how much I absolutely love my boyfriend yet? I mean, he is absolutely the best. xd Pregnancy and marriage just doesn't seem so scary when I picture him right beside me. I can't wait until Friday when I'll finally be able to be in his arms again. I didn't know it was possible to miss anyone this much, but I'll endure it for two years, or even more if I have to. And for once I'm actually 100% confident that I can do something. 3nodding
beautifuldream Community Member 
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Community Member
Ouch. That's awful, but I'm sure you can make up for that test with other marks. Though knowing you, you might have been able to pull off something, even on the essay you had no idea about. Let me know how it turns out.
And I don't think being scared of pregnancy is irrational. I mean...it's a whole new life you're creating. I think it'd be weird if you weren't at least a little scared of it. But anyway...I think you have plenty of time to worry about things like that in the future, so don't dwell on them so much for the time being.
I'm happy for your confidence. I'll try that reading sometime this weekend and let you know the results, though I highly advise you not to take it too seriously, whether it comes out positive or negative. The future is a dynamic thing...