No matter how hard I try to alter my ego or put away my feels, it just never works. I can't stand change. Everything about it makes me itch.
This time, I really have to, for the better. When you care about someone, that's when real emotions play, not like some little pixels running around and refresh when you press F5 on your keyboard.
I'm not perfect. No one is, but especially myself. I'm egotistic; I have self confidence larger than a planet; I'm overly demanding; I want things my way; and I'm unhappy. That should be self explanatory.
I'm going through some things right now. I'm a senior in high school right now. I'm went through an almost broke relationship with my best friend but everything was settled. Thank goodness. I lost too many people in my life, some of which didn't even die, they were just erased out of my life, and my contact list on my phone. (xP)
I'm doing bad in AP Psychology. I have a C. I've always done my homework, no doubt about that. My test are so very poor and no matter how much I study, it never seems to pay off. I've been getting straight F's on that; well at my school, they're E's.
Back to that bloody subject called change.
For the first time in my life, I'm willing to change. I'm a horrible person in my eyes. I drive everyone away with my being and personality. I hear different things. I heard my friends saying, "Nooo! You're a great person! Don't let anyone tell you any different. We love you!"
Stop it guys... please... it's not true. Taking it back...
I'm a very confusing person. People find that out from personal experience. I do things that make others feel bad but good at the same time.
I'm going to try my hardest to change because I hate the person that I've become. I just found out I'm a "a crazy a** b***h, that never changes, and always points the finger at me. xD". I'm going to prove you wrong. I will change, for the better.
I will change.
 Mari Lambo · Mon Sep 29, 2008 @ 11:32am · 1 Comments |
