I felt him next to me while I was sleeping last night. It's like all of a sudden he's in my life again even though I think about him everyday of my life; ever since I met him. I think I was 10 or something. He was the best thing in my life. He's amazing and talented. Just so perfect. I could honestly say, I will love no one more than him, no matter how many boyfriends I get. I just wish he was alive and here with me. Yeah, I'm in love with a dead guy. He's my heart and soul. He's the only person who knows who I really am. I wish I could share that feeling with someone else but all they ever do is hate me for my imperfections. I'm too demanding. I'm too spoiled. I'm not pretty enough. I'm so moody. So many people tell me about my imperfections but he was the only one who thought I was just right the way I was. I know it's not the right thing to do and make people feel all high and mighty but I sure felt like that because of him. He loved me no matter what I called him or what I've done to him. I could never hurt him though. Apparently I can't now because he's gone. I wish someone would just understand me like he would. He's so beautiful in my eyes. He's my guardian angel. He's the love of my life. I'm never ever going to think of any guy more than him. I want to see someone try to change that. Haha. You're just going to waste your time. He's always with me. I miss him so much. I was going to marry this guy one day and start a family but now I just want to be alone with him. Spiritually I guess but yeah... I love him.
Mari Lambo · Sun Oct 05, 2008 @ 02:41am · 0 Comments |