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Hmm...wow, dang, I'm sorry to hear that, but I think maybe you should tell someone you know in real life, someone you trust. Just have them be there for you, you know? I know I felt different since entering high school, especially in friends. People change from elementary school to middle school, and from middle school to high school. I'm not really sure what you're experiencing. I think it might be because of bottling up feelings. If you do do that, you should find a way to release that. Maybe it's your self esteem? Whatever it is, I just wanna let you know that suicide is not the answer. You're a Christian, right?

i feel the same way!! crying

Hey, i've been there before. (Idk if you know this or not) Lasyt year things got so bad, I tried to kill myself. Method, stake knif to the heart. But I'm so happy a friend stopped me. But trust me things get better. I got through it becasue I had friends here to help me. I'm always just a pm away if you need in (or a tex if you don't have my # it's (714) 308-2021). Things do get better, even if it doen't look like it. Take it from someone who's been there.