This is just weird. I had a terrible dream that wouldn't sound terrible to anyone else I bet [ stare ] and then last night I had another dream. These two dreams are, shall we say, special, because...first of all, I don't remember dreams, I ALWAYS forget them, normally immediately. There are some good ones that I kinda...I dunno, force myself to remember, but other than that...
These two dreams actually had me, like, my body in them, like I'm seeing and moving and speaking through my own body. It's been a long time since I had a dream in which I could control my actions, and normally those dreams are freaking fun!
No, no. This sucks, this BITES! And so close to Christmas too. This sucks.
Ahem, on a lighter note, I've been getting away with being on Gaia for more than two hours now! blaugh My mom isn't even noticing. biggrin
Well, that's all.
*Edit* I'm in need of a rant, I'll put it in white so anyone can skip over it. There's swearing, so please just skip it. Well this is just the best damned day I've ever had. Cleaning, cleaning, cleaning, lectures from mom.
I do my chores. I need to be nagged occasionally because I have no motivation. My mom's house is dirty, I understand that. I clean as best as I can, I clean more than both of them do, so they need to simply shut the ******** up. My mom has no right to call me a dependent five year old, she is stupid to think that just because I don't get off the internet when she says that I am disrespectful, that I give her no respect.
You know what? Whatever mom. I get A's and B's, I know proper manners, I clean as well as I can, I don't bother you with my damn pathetic feelings, and I'm too damn ugly to cause you any damn stress over a boyfriend. I don't have many friends, I'm somewhat of a hermit, and all I ask is that I can use the damn computer.
If I could get a job, of course I would, I know she has damn money problems and all that jolly s**t!
I am just as tired as her, why doesn't she see that? She works full-time. She drives to her office, she sits at a chair for hours, drives home and gets pissed at me when it's inconveinient to make dinner because the kitchen isn't clean.
Well guess what? I get up at 6 o'clock. Mom gets up at 8:30. I go to school where I am bored out of my mind, trying to soak up information, walking around that huge campus, trying to concentrate, trying to make it through the day without crying or hurting myself.
So she makes the money. If I could, I'd be gone, far from here, away from the ******** HELL HOLE. How dare she say call me a dependent five year old, how dare she think I am just being lazy and that I don't really have it that hard. ******** it, I have no respect for her...hardly.
She's a one income mom doing her best, I respect that, but GOD, some of her ways of thinking.
All this added to my saturated mind already. Whatever.
Byes Journal.
-Kat
Iklbug Community Member 
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